Do you think referring to "females" as "girls" in the "Looking for" section to be sexist and demeaning?

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ColorsWolf

Sep 24, 2013

If you meant "fully grown adult WOMAN", then refer to them as such, please don't belittle women and butcher the English language with sexism and demeaning slang!~

How many of you also think that referring to "females" as "girls" in the "Looking for" section is sexist and demeaning?~

sfguyyy

Sep 24, 2013

OkCupid has always been "cheeky" with its wording and references, this is just an example of that.

The interesting thing is that when it comes to both the management here and the typical user (at least historically), OkCupid is FAR FAR more liberal than almost any of the competition, and has overall, the least issues with things like sexism and racism and so on.

The fact that some highly developed-by-marketing-committee competitors studiously avoid such language doesn't necessarily mean they are more concerned or sensitive, it mostly means that their marketing people know that such things are hot-buttons for some people, so they excise anything but the most boring, middle-of-the-road, bland stuff from every corner of their sites, for fear of offending anyone.

The thing about OkCupid is that it historically assumed its target users to be sophisticated enough to see the difference between cheeky and piggish.

Unfortunately as the site has gotten entrenched and now stagnant, much of its style has evaporated while its userbase has gotten less and less astute about such things. ;)

 

DiscoJer

Sep 24, 2013

Meh, they aren't really liberal, they are corporatist. Part of the new digital oligarchy.

But beyond that, part of the thing is that the acceptable terms often change.

Many women find the term "females" to be offensive.

Even non-gender/race specific terms can change in how they are perceived. Like "pal" or "buddy" used to be used like man or dude (or the current "bro"), yet now if you call someone pal or buddy chances are you'll piss them off.

ColorsWolf

Sep 24, 2013

Would it be so hard to refer to both as "men" and "women", or how about "male" and "female"?~

The OkCupid system is based on a binary system of "male" and "female" for the sexes any ways so it wouldn't be such an issue separating terms as there are no options for others who not identify as "male" or "female" regardless.~

MsOtis

Sep 25, 2013

some people think that calling women "females" is demeaning.

Not sure if it's more demeaning than "girls."

I don't care either way.

ColorsWolf

Sep 25, 2013

It's demeaning to be called "female"?~ Wow, has the misogyny let up at all over the decades?~

MsOtis

Sep 25, 2013

??

Not sure what that means, but several women who are feminists on the forums object strongly to being called females.

Just sayin.

sfguyyy

Sep 25, 2013

 

Meh, they aren't really liberal, they are corporatist.

 

I'm imagining how you must approach shoe shopping.

Decide ahead of time what size and style you want, buy them site unseen, then when you discover they don't fit and actually hurt your feet, spend months going through machinations and exercises and pain and suffering and in the end, blame the manufacturer for them not fitting your feet.

 

 

ColorsWolf

Sep 25, 2013

MsOtis

Today – 5:17pm

"??

Not sure what that means, but several women who are feminists on the forums object strongly to being called females.

Just sayin."

 

That is counterproductive, if the context or the meaning behind the word "Female" is not an insult, then by their own beliefs and pride of "being a woman" shouldn't they be PROUD of being a called a "female" or "woman"?~

 

Seriously this self-imposing misogyny or "hatred of women" perpetuated by WOMEN even "WOMEN feminists" is so subtle it's laughable!~

"Oh I'm an adult, but don't call me a "WOMAN" EVER.~ Bleh!~ I'm a "girl"!~ ^_^ Teehee!~ Oh and I'm a feminist!~ :)"

 

*rolls over floor laughing* HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!~

AirmanEpic

Sep 25, 2013

What's insulting about "Girls?"

Plenty of people use that phrase outside of this site, it's trying to stay relevant and I respect that. Target people who are using that in real life if it offends you, I honestly think "girls" is a lot more endearing and friendly than "Females"

ColorsWolf

Sep 25, 2013

AirmanEpic 

3 minutes ago

"What's insulting about "Girls?"

Plenty of people use that phrase outside of this site, it's trying to stay relevant and I respect that. Target people who are using that in real life if it offends you, I honestly think "girls" is a lot more endearing and friendly than "Females""

 

It doesn't have to be "females" it can be "women", but "girls" is outright stating that in your Looking For Section that you are looking for immature females and I find that insulting not only to WOMEN but to my preferences in searching for some one to love.~

GimmeThaLoot

Sep 25, 2013

This is one of the more stupid threads I have ever seen.

Someone getting angry at calling women "girls" and then getting confused that not everyone shares his tastes in language.

5FM_

Sep 25, 2013

"girls" is outright stating that in your Looking For Section that you are looking for immature females

 

Obviously  this  is untrue,  but  at its  kernel,  actually  a swell  idea.

 

I  propose  that  the  "Looking  for"  section  now  replace  "girls"  with  "immature  females,"  with  no  other  changes.  At  least  that  would  be an  outright  statement.  (Bonus:  it'd  probably  attract  girls  with  low  self-esteem.)  :|

OceanTorrent

Sep 25, 2013

Seconding this motion. I would like my preference in a partner explicitly shown to be cute young girl who likes to party.

PikerSkiff

Sep 26, 2013

I didn't vote in the poll. I, personally, would suggest that every female user who feels offended by the usage of the word "girl" cancels their monthly subscription and deletes their account immediately. That will show them. It's also the only way to actually make an impact, it's the only language they understand: losing revenue.

A positive side-effect would be, that I stay out of your life and you stay out of mine. Fair play.

Informavore

Sep 27, 2013

Take their Dating Persona test.  Get to the part where they helpfully redirect you if you have an STD.  (Although as someone who's been around forever, it would've been funny if their new corporate overlords missed that.)

The simplest solution would be two similar helpful links.  If you're upset about your special snowflake term not showing up, you might be happier here.

If you're going to write angry letters about oppressed you feel because OKC is not using flavor-of-the-month buzzwords, you should probably go here.

-Morpheus-

Sep 27, 2013

At least this thread gave me a chuckle.... perhaps we could try...

♂ and ♀

or are symbols also insulting? Probably ... and confusing as well. 

My only vaguely relevant thought is that the words should be 'paired'...

  • girls or boys
  • women or men 
  • female or male  
  • gals or guys (is that right?)
  • ♀ or ♂ (because I find it humorous)
  • ladies or gentlemen (yes I know... would never work!!!)

 

Tulefel

Sep 27, 2013

  • lads and lasses
  • testosterone-based life-form and estrogen-based life-form
ColorsWolf

Sep 27, 2013

-Morpheus- 

Today – 11:11am

"At least this thread gave me a chuckle.... perhaps we could try...

♂ and ♀

or are symbols also insulting? Probably ... and confusing as well. 

My only vaguely relevant thought is that the words should be 'paired'...

  • girls or boys
  • women or men 
  • female or male  
  • gals or guys (is that right?)
  • ♀ or ♂ (because I find it humorous)
  • ladies or gentlemen (yes I know... would never work!!!)"

 

This is exactly what I am talking about, at the very least it's sexist because it excludes 1 sex and not the other from this treatment.~

sfguyyy

Sep 27, 2013

 

Oh look, ColorsWolf is buying into the gender binary concept.

How backwards of you. Kind of ironic coming from a person whining about "sexist terminology". :P

 

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