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atropa777

25 / F / straight / Single

Ypsilanti, Michigan

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Body acceptance, fat, feminism

edit moved to the bottom of the post
I don't even know where to start with this one. So I apologize in advance for the roughness.

1. We live in a society* obsessed with thinness. Obsessed. The diet industry is a $35 BILLION a year industry in the US. There are a half dozen reality shows on primetime TV that document losing weight at fat camp, the foolishness mainstream models have to endure, and designing clothes for sometimes dangerously skinny women. That's not even including the "extreme makeover" shows that liposuction fat out of stomachs, thighs, necks, and asses, or reward people for losing large amounts of weight. Meanwhile, there aren't many shows that deal with the dangers of being too thin. Thousands of real women suffer from anorexia nervosa and bulimia every year because they feel they aren't thin enough.

2. Health is not correlated with fat. Let me say that again really slowly for you.

Fat does NOT in and of itself indicate unfit.

So don't say that you're anti-fat because fattiez don't exercise enough. Because I bet this guy can complete a marathon faster than you can.

Before your heads explode, let me spell it out for you. Fat people can be unfit. Skinny people can be unfit. Old people can have poor fitness. People who sit in front of a computer, or game controller, or stand at a register for hours upon hours a day can have bad cardiovascular fitness. To say that all fat people are fat because they're lazy and overeating is ignorant and/or bigoted.

3. Fat people are not a monolith of lazy couch potatoes eating cheetos and drinking mountain dew morning, noon, and night. People get fat because they have metabolic conditions, hormonal problems (1 in 10 women have PCOS), have limited mobility for extended periods of time (whether that's due to cancer, injury, or other condition beyond their control), gained weight slowly over time, got depressed, hate exercising, or just don't have the time or money to exercise because they're poor and working for food and shelter is more important than running 5 miles a day.**

Add to all those problems the fact that cheaper, more convenient foods are processed with partially or fully hydrogenated oils, high-fructose corn syrup and other synthetic chemicals, and it's easy to see why eating healthily is requires people to be either informed and discerning consumers, farmers/gardeners living off the grid, lucky enough to be raised in an environment that teaches healthy eating habits, and affluent enough to afford organic nutritious food.

4. Body acceptance is something that everyone should aspire to. Confidence is sexy-- and unless you really are a middle or upper class WASP 20-something with perfect vision, completely symmetric features, full straight hair, perfectly clear tanned but not too tan skin, and a great fashion sense, chances are, you're insecure about your appearance in some way.

People need to stop hating themselves for having
  • acne,
  • scars,
  • fat,
  • cellulite,
  • that weird cut over their hips,
  • blotchy complexions,
  • bad vision,
  • extra body hair,
  • stubby toes,
  • kinky hair,
  • cowlicks,
  • odd proportions,
  • waddles,
  • small mouths,
  • ears that stick out,
  • stretch marks,
  • tan lines,
  • hair that's migrating south from your head to your ears and backs (I'm looking at you, men-not-balding-gracefully),
  • unsymmetrical labia,
  • unusually shaped penises and testicles,
  • gray hairs,
  • love handles,
  • dark skin,
  • pale skin,
  • thunder thighs,
  • big feet,
  • wide asses,
  • hairy digits,
    and
  • whatever else people hate about themselves.


That's what fat acceptance is. The absence of hating your body. Body acceptance is a good thing regardless of your age, sex, race, or socioeconomic status. I really, sincerely, want everyone on OkCupid to accept their bodies without hate.

I'm not saying you have to find fat people or skinny people attractive. Or anyone attractive at all. If that's what you took away from this, you're willfully misinterpreting or an idiot.

What you do need to do to at least mask your bigotry from sight, is not
  • make fun of,
  • belittle,
    or
  • otherwise hate,
  • offer unsolicited advice to people you don't know like:
    • "exercise more"
    • eat less
    • eat better

to fat people who are just existing and aren't sorry for it. Sound familiar, feminists? Sort of like not hating women for unapologetically existing, huh?

4. Body acceptance, like feminism, will benefit everyone. Fat acceptance especially benefits people who have an emotionally unhealthy relationship with food. Whether that's compulsive eaters, bulimics, or anorexics.

5. Fat is a feminist issue. Boys and men are increasingly suffering from society's obsession with thinness: more are seeking out plastic surgery for liposuction, gluteal and pectoral implants, and rhinoplasty. More teenage boys are becoming anorexic and bulemic. But it is still women who have to apologize the most and face the most harassment for being fat, for taking up space and food, for not conforming to male ideas of beauty.

I expect other (radical, militant, armchair, progressive, whatever) feminists to support fat acceptance just as readily as they do other anti-racist, feminist, queer, and social justice causes. This is part of my personal manifesta. I don't expect people to agree with me about everything. I do expect people to own up to the attitudes and prejudices they carry honestly.

====================================================
*shorthand for white American consumer culture, which exports its ideals to the rest of the world. A la the Ms. Universe contest, etc. Assuming you have internet access, this should not come as a shock to you.

**None of these conditions are mutually exclusive.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Edits: August 9 edit: Comments are closed til I get back from Ohio, at which point I will be in a better frame of mind to deal with this foolishness, basically, not deal with it at all.

8/10: Any comment talking about how fat people complain about their weight is probably deleted and or blocked. No one complained about their weight until OHS and CJ. The implication that all fat people constantly complain and are unhappy about their weight makes it so much easier to hate on them if it looks as if they're hating themselves. If someone's lack of self-loathing offends you, then there's probably some bigotry going on.

Let's talk about something less controversial for a minute. If we were having a discussion instead on why minorities shouldn't feel compelled to conform to unreachable ideals of white beauty like
  • light eyes,
  • pale skin,
  • straight hair with moderate texture,
  • narrow and slightly upturned smallish nose,
  • un-slanted eyes,
  • bigger breasts than hips in women and broad shouldered men
, no one would dare say that they should continue to hate their bodies the way they are and subject themselves to unhealthy and dangerous extremes to meet those unrealistic paragons of white beauty. If you don't think that skin bleach treatments and hair relaxers are unhealthy and dangerous, why don't you go buy some and test it on your skin, let's see how long it takes you to get a nasty chemical burn? /edit
edit moved to the bottom of the post
I don't even know where to start with this one. So I apologize inadvance for the roughness.

1. We live in a society* obsessed with thinness. Obsessed.The diet industry is a $35 BILLION a year industry in the US. There are a half dozenreality shows on primetime TV that document losing weight at fatcamp, the foolishness mainstream models have to endure, anddesigning clothes for sometimes dangerously skinny women. That'snot even including the "extreme makeover" shows that liposuctionfat out of stomachs, thighs, necks, and asses, or reward people forlosing large amounts of weight. Meanwhile, there aren't many showsthat deal with the dangers of being too thin. Thousands of realwomen suffer fromanorexia nervosa and bulimiaevery year because they feel they aren't thin enough.

2. Health is notcorrelated with fat. Let me say that again really slowly foryou.

Fatdoes NOT in and of itself indicate unfit.

So don't say that you're anti-fat because fattiez don't exerciseenough. Because I bet this guy can complete a marathon faster than you can.

Before your heads explode, let me spell it out for you. Fat peoplecan be unfit. Skinny people can beunfit. Old people can have poor fitness. People who sit in front ofa computer, or game controller, or stand at a register for hoursupon hours a day can have bad cardiovascular fitness. To say thatall fat people are fat because they're lazy and overeating isignorant and/or bigoted.

3. Fat people are not a monolith of lazy couch potatoeseating cheetos and drinking mountain dew morning, noon, and night.People get fat because they have metabolic conditions, hormonalproblems (1 in 10 women have PCOS), have limitedmobility for extended periods of time (whether that's due tocancer, injury, or other condition beyond their control), gainedweight slowly over time, got depressed, hate exercising, or justdon't have the time or money to exercise because they're poor andworking for food and shelter is more important than running 5 milesa day.**

Add to all those problems the fact that cheaper, more convenientfoods are processed with partially or fully hydrogenated oils,high-fructose corn syrup and other synthetic chemicals, and it'seasy to see why eating healthily is requires people to be eitherinformed and discerning consumers, farmers/gardeners living off thegrid, lucky enough to be raised in an environment that teacheshealthy eating habits, and affluent enough to afford organicnutritious food.

4. Body acceptance is something that everyone should aspireto. Confidence is sexy-- and unless you really are a middle orupper class WASP 20-something with perfect vision, completelysymmetric features, full straight hair, perfectly clear tanned butnot too tan skin, and a great fashion sense, chances are, you'reinsecure about your appearance in some way.

People need to stop hating themselves for having
  • acne,
  • scars,
  • fat,
  • cellulite,
  • that weird cut over their hips,
  • blotchy complexions,
  • bad vision,
  • extra body hair,
  • stubby toes,
  • kinky hair,
  • cowlicks,
  • odd proportions,
  • waddles,
  • small mouths,
  • ears that stick out,
  • stretch marks,
  • tan lines,
  • hair that's migrating south from your head to your ears andbacks (I'm looking at you, men-not-balding-gracefully),
  • unsymmetrical labia,
  • unusually shaped penises and testicles,
  • gray hairs,
  • love handles,
  • dark skin,
  • pale skin,
  • thunder thighs,
  • big feet,
  • wide asses,
  • hairy digits,
    and
  • whatever else people hate about themselves.


That's what fat acceptance is. The absence of hating your body.Body acceptance is a good thing regardless of your age, sex,race, or socioeconomic status. I really, sincerely, want everyoneon OkCupid to accept their bodies without hate.

I'm not saying you have to find fat people or skinny peopleattractive. Or anyone attractive at all. If that's what youtook away from this, you're willfully misinterpreting or anidiot.

What you do need to do to at least mask your bigotry from sight, isnot
  • make fun of,
  • belittle,
    or
  • otherwise hate,
  • offer unsolicited advice to people you don't know like:
    • "exercise more"
    • eat less
    • eat better

to fat people who are just existing and aren't sorry for it. Soundfamiliar, feminists? Sort of like not hating women forunapologetically existing, huh?

4. Body acceptance, like feminism, will benefit everyone.Fat acceptance especially benefits people who have an emotionallyunhealthy relationship with food. Whether that's compulsive eaters,bulimics, or anorexics.

5. Fat is a feminist issue. Boys and men are increasinglysuffering from society's obsession with thinness: more are seekingout plastic surgery for liposuction, gluteal and pectoral implants,and rhinoplasty. More teenage boys are becoming anorexic andbulemic. But it is still women who have to apologize the most andface the most harassment for being fat, for taking up space andfood, for not conforming to male ideas of beauty.

I expect other (radical, militant, armchair, progressive, whatever)feminists to support fat acceptance just as readily as they doother anti-racist, feminist, queer, and social justice causes. Thisis part of my personal manifesta. I don't expect people to agreewith me about everything. I do expect people to own up to theattitudes and prejudices they carry honestly.

====================================================
*shorthand for white American consumer culture, which exports itsideals to the rest of the world. A la the Ms. Universe contest,etc. Assuming you have internet access, this should not come as ashock to you.

**None of these conditions are mutually exclusive.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Edits: August 9 edit: Comments are closed til I get backfrom Ohio, at which point I will be in a better frame of mindto deal with this foolishness, basically, not deal with it atall.

8/10: Any comment talking about how fat people complainabout their weight is probably deleted and or blocked. No onecomplained about their weight until OHS and CJ. The implicationthat all fat people constantly complain and are unhappy about theirweight makes it so much easier to hate on them if it looks as ifthey're hating themselves. If someone's lack of self-loathingoffends you, then there's probably some bigotry going on.

Let's talk about something less controversial for a minute. If wewere having a discussion instead on why minorities shouldn't feelcompelled to conform to unreachable ideals of white beauty like
  • light eyes,
  • pale skin,
  • straight hair with moderate texture,
  • narrow and slightly upturned smallish nose,
  • un-slanted eyes,
  • bigger breasts than hips in women and broad shouldered men
, no one would dare say that they should continue to hate theirbodies the way they are and subject themselves to unhealthy anddangerous extremes to meet those unrealistic paragons of whitebeauty. If you don't think that skin bleach treatments and hairrelaxers are unhealthy and dangerous, why don't you go buy some andtest it on your skin, let's see how long it takes you to get anasty chemical burn? /edit
Body acceptance, fat, feminism
An image of atropa777 I couldn't find a convenient place to link this excellent article by Paul Campos: http://tinyurl.com/2ny7sm and a quote: Consider two women of average height, who weigh 110 and 150 pounds, respectively. The former "ideal weight" woman is roughly ten pounds away from a lower weight level that correlates with a doubling of her mortality risk, while the latter "overweight" woman would have to gain more than 100 pounds to move into a similar risk category. And while people generally gain weight in middle age, they usually begin to lose weight once they've reached retirement age--and nearly 80% of all deaths take place among people 65 and older. (Indeed, high weight has almost no correlation--or even a negative correlation--with mortality risk among the elderly, while weight loss has a very strong positive correlation, even when one controls for weight loss caused by eventually fatal illnesses). Given these facts, it seems odd to focus on the possibility of an "overweight" woman gaining 100 pounds rather than a thin woman losing ten.

atropa777 commented on

Default user image I'm so thin I once stabbed myself in the eye with a kneecap.

A former user commented on

An image of atropa777 Other great resources:

Junkfood science blog http://tinyurl.com/ypshq7

http://tinyurl.com/347xy4

atropa777 commented on

An image of atropa777 And, if you want a tiny take-away message, it's that people have different body masses for a variety of complex socioeconomic, biochemical, and psychological reasons. Assuming that all fattiez r lazy is about as cogent as assuming that all women are mothers, all black people are stupid, and all gays are child molesters.

atropa777 commented on

An image of sararhm Amen!

sararhm commented on

Default user image absolutely

A former user commented on

An image of flufficat Great post, you are really on the money.

flufficat commented on

An image of atropa777 Oh, and I'm totally going to start linking here when "kill urself, fattie" starts popping up on my radar. I encourage the rest of you to do the same.

atropa777 commented on

An image of wimsey70 I just wrote about this in my journal.I don't even know where to start with this one. So I apologize in advance for the roughness.
...

wimsey70 commented on

Default user image Kudos to you for taking the time to write this. With a few minor changes, it's like something I've had in mind. Emphasis on mind, of course.Two books I highly recommend: Fat! So? Because You Don't Have To Apologize For Your Size. by Marilyn Wann, and The Obesity Myth: Why America's Obsession with Weight is Hazardous to Your Health by Paul Campos. The title of the latter might have been changed to substitute "The Diet Myth" for "The Obesity Myth".I would also add that all that fat sucking and body slicing/dicing to aim towards the wonderful goal of a size 0 often comes with major drawbacks. A friend got weight loss surgery... she hasn't lost nearly as much weight as she'd like, and she's going to have to be under a doctor's care for the rest of her life. Her sister got the same surgery and had to rush to a doctor once when she got a tiny piece of carrot wedged incorrectly in her innards.

A former user commented on

Default user image *applauds wildly*

cguni commented on

An image of atropa777 If hearting people were ever appropriate, now would be the time. But love to all of you. :)

atropa777 commented on

An image of harpy61 Brava! I've been planning a longer piece of my own, and was about to start writing. It will have a different focus, more on sexuality, but I applaud everything you said.

harpy61 commented on

Default user image Paul Campos gets into the racist and classist aspects of fat hatred in his book. From personal experience, I can only rant personally about the class aspects. Some other time, of course.It's unfortunate that "out of shape" has come to be a commonly used term for level of fitness. I have a shape. Everyone has a shape, unless they are an amorphous cloud of pure energy. I am in my current shape. During the summer, when I'm (hopefully) gardening, I'll have a slightly different shape.You left out a key element of perfect WASPishness.... blonde hair and blue eyes. Red hair comes in second. Even the societally aspired-to WASP vision of female perfection can (and often does) have body insecurity. Looking "perfect" doesn't mean someone will feel perfect.Also... "extra body hair"? If it grows there naturally, it's not "extra". A merkin, or a wig would qualify as "extra". And... "unusually shaped penises" and asymetrical labia are the norm. The problem comes from people getting their notion of normality from porn and airbrushed models in advertising, among other places.I really, sincerely, want everyone on OkCupid to accept their bodies without hate.Go you! Sincerely.

A former user commented on

An image of aych_ex_see I just wrote about this in my journal.I don't even know where to start with this one. So I apologize in advance for the roughness.
...

aych_ex_see commented on

An image of atropa777 It's unfortunate that "out of shape" has come to be a commonly used term for level of fitness. I have a shape. Everyone has a shape, unless they are an amorphous cloud of pure energy.

Eve, that's exactly my pet peeve about height-weight proportionate too. The phrase assumes that there is a correct proportion of height to weight. Everyone has a height to weight ratio. And it varies depending on the elevation you're standing at, what you're wearing, what your mass is, how tall you are, what you ate, and your state of health.

And BMI is a broken measurement. Brad Pitt is overweight according to BMI. Seriously, Brad Pitt. Overweight.

http://kateharding.net/bmi-illustrated/

atropa777 commented on

An image of atropa777 And when I say:

I expect other (radical, militant, armchair, progressive, whatever) feminists to support fat acceptance just as readily as they do other anti-racist, feminist, queer, and social justice causes. This is part of my personal manifesta. I don't expect people to agree with me about everything. I do expect people to own up to the attitudes and prejudices they carry honestly.

What I mean is, if you want my support for your progressive cause, whatever that cause is, I want your support in return. I expect you to not tacitly approve of fat bashing. I expect you to examine your own body attitudes. If you consider yourself my friend, I expect you to tell your friends you don't agree with them if they're fat bashing. I don't care if you do it in private or public, but your silence is tacit approval.

atropa777 commented on

An image of atropa777 Ok, Ok, I promise to stop the narcissistic commenting right after posting this link http://tinyurl.com/2dpczd

atropa777 commented on

An image of Permanence_101 Suddenly <3'S Atropa.

Permanence_101 commented on

An image of mcwho Yes, this is the team I'm on.

No bashing.

Very clearly stated, as usual, and thanks.

mcwho commented on

Default user image And BMI is a broken measurement.

Yeah it is. I believe last time I checked my BMI, I was somewhere in the seriously obese category. While I could certainly drop 20 pounds or at least firm it up, I've never been called fat or anything close to it... and yet the media keeps making all these reports about American schoolkids using BMI. Feh.

A former user commented on

Default user image I have a dear friend who is an endurance athlete - I could find no real fat on his body, and his BMI said he was obese.

witchzenka commented on

An image of CheshireKat56 *loves atropa*

CheshireKat56 commented on

An image of SatanLuciferi And BMI is a broken measurement. Brad Pitt is overweight according to BMI. Seriously, Brad Pitt. Overweight.

Glad I read the comments because I was just going to say this.

Consider me on Team Atropa. Unfit = Unfabulous. Fit = Fabulous. Fit does not equal thin. Being healthy is my personal crusade and if anyone wants an eCoach, just say so.

SatanLuciferi commented on

An image of atropa777 Perm, I kind of heart you, mcwho, witchz, and SatanLu, and everyone else too :) Love, love, love.

I also wanted to say publicly that if anyone wants to comment here and can't, please email my tracker profile, perspicacity777 and I'll unblock you. The conditions of posting are of course that you are engaging honestly, and have read the articles/studies/blogs/comments that I've linked to. In short, I won't unblock you so you can say "lose weight or kill urself, fattie."

atropa777 commented on

An image of G_mork Thank you, Atropa.

G_mork commented on

An image of cricketsmack Unfit = Unfabulous. Fit = Fabulous. Fit does not equal thin. Being healthy is my personal crusade and if anyone wants an eCoach, just say so.

IAWTC

My dad, who is in no way large, is considered overweight by his BMI...my dad eats like a bird and would be considered thin by anyone who meets him.

Fat acceptance especially benefits people who have an emotionally unhealthy relationship with food.

I think I just messaged my eAuntie something similar to this. I dont agree with people I love damaging their bodies and threatening their lives through overeating, but I dont think that publicly shaming them is going to help them lose their emotional dependence on food. Much like publicly shaming me is not going to make me lose my emotional dependence on nicotine. I dont want my family and friends who are unhealthily obese to *want* to be fat...but I do want them to love themselves (and I will love them) no matter what they look like. *babble babble babble*

cricketsmack commented on

An image of Eavocative Thanks Atropa, as ever, for saying everything that I don't have the time to research and support adequately. You have (and will continue to be) one of my OkC heroines.

I am proud to call you my friend.

Eavocative commented on

An image of atropa777 I would like to say that fat doesn't equate to an unhealthy relationship with food. People of all sizes emotionally eat. And to single out fat people as emotional over-eaters while also not acknowledging the serious problems of binging and purging, or emotionally refusing to eat food is targeting fat people. Simply because they're fat.

It's hard for me to express exactly what I mean here. I am not trying to deny that there are lots of people who are fat because they have a poor diet and don't get much physical exercise. Those people exist. They need to change their lifestyle or else they're going to die of a sedentary life.

What I guess I'm trying to get at is that fat shaming under the guise of caring about someone's health is still fat shaming, I don't care who does it. If you know someone who is inactive, encourage them to be more active or support their desire to be more active. If you know someone who has a disordered relationship with food, whether that's overeating, emotionally eating, refusing to eat, or binging and purging, or obsessive calorie counting, you should definitely encourage them in a healthier relationship with food without blaming them for that relationship. http://tinyurl.com/2ohtrg

atropa777 commented on

An image of atropa777 Plus, at the heart of anorexia, bulimia, and dieting, is the mortal fear that some people have that if they're not skinny enough, people won't love them. That people will hate them because they're fat. Hating fat people only fuels anorexics and bulemics to take their bodies and make them too skinny.

atropa777 commented on

An image of lordsuperfast I just wrote about this in my journal.I don't even know where to start with this one. So I apologize in advance for the roughness.
...

lordsuperfast commented on

An image of mcwho It's hard to accept, but hating and shaming behaviors almost always have at root self-hatred for failing in some way to achieve the nonexistent perfection portrayed as the ideal.

This can extend to all kinds of hating, not just about body issues, but faith, intelligence, and on and on. None of us can live up to perfection, we all have enormous flaws that we try to hide. Most especially from ourselves.

Peace is way more than an absence of violence. We can all find ways to be less negative about all the things we "hate".

Obviously (to me) I am leaving in a bit for my difficult support group. I am filled with compassion, I am filled with compassion, I will stay filled with compassion for the next few hours, or bust.

mcwho commented on

Default user image I appreciate what you are saying, Atropa. I would never hate myself for any of the reasons mentioned. However, I do consider weight problematic in terms of attracting a mate. I'm not so worried about how I see myself as how others see me, and I have a hard time being confident about my weight when so many men make it clear that it's a priority for them. I find that painful, but hard to ignore.

I don't think I have ever disliked myself, but I have sometimes doubted other people's relationship priorities.

A former user commented on

An image of wimsey70 The issue that many proponents of fat-shaming don't understand that just being obese by medical standards doesn't necessarily translate into an unhealthy relationship with food. For example, I don't eat chips or sweets. If you come to my house, you'll find organic chicken, fish, eggs, and lots of vegetables and fruit in my refrigerator. I eat half of my portion at restaurants and take the other half home. Yet I am obese, and I get hate mail because of it. It's not as simple as "fat people are lazy slobs who stuff their mouths with food all the time." And it's not as easy as "eat less and exercise more" for a lot of people. In the end, what I strive for is to eat healthy, exercise as best I can, and accept that my body isn't perfect.

So threads like the one going around lately aren't, in any way, about promoting an unhealthy lifestyle, and that's what the critics fail to understand. It's about accepting your body the way it is, bumps, warts, bulges, and all, and that's not equivalent to saying, "sit on your fat ass and eat chips."

wimsey70 commented on

An image of attagurrl Well stated. Thank you.

attagurrl commented on

An image of harpy61 Yes, that annoys me. I got a comment about the food thing on my journal. I love food, but I cook, eat sensibly most of the time and don't even like twinkies. Actually, not being American, I'm not sure what twinkies are, but they must be some kind of chocolate bar or cake, and I don't have a sweet tooth.

harpy61 commented on

An image of atropa777 Harpy, bless you for not knowing what a twinkie is. It's a horrible piece of nastiness that is basically sugar, cream, starch, preservatives, and yellow #6. But regardless of that, I do like sweets. I like some chips. I like rich foods made with real butter, vegetables, alcohol, starches, I like salads, fruits, vegetables, salt, eggs, candy, pop, ice cream, whole grains, poultry, and did I mention fruit? MMmmm blueberries. I am not going to let anyone stop me from enjoying food. Embarassing me about what goes in my mouth isn't going to do anything besides encourage me to 1. think the person doing it is an asshole, 2. find new friends, and 3. eat more, secretly.

atropa777 commented on

An image of cricketsmack I don't think I have ever disliked myself, but I have sometimes doubted other people's relationship priorities.

I really liked that atropa included in her post that not everyone needs to be attracted to people of any body type. Though my top priority in a relationship is not physical attraction, it is a priority. And I dont see how you can really work around that. How anyone can work around that. *shrug* Certain people will never find me attractive because I have small breasts. This is something everyone faces. Someone we find physically attractive will not find us physically attractive. Im sure you didnt intend it this way, but it sounds as if you are saying their priorities are messed up because they dont want to be in a relationship with you because of the way you look.

cricketsmack commented on

An image of harpy61 Exactly. I love some rich foods, and love real mayo and taramasalata, for example. I could drink olive oil. But I mostly practice moderation, cut down the fat in how I cook and practice portion control. I use ediets for ideas about what to eat, but had to give up on one of their plans, because the desserts were way too sweet for me. I'd rather have fruit and plain yoghurt. I do keep a bag of Ghiradelli dark chocolate drops in my fridge for those crave moments (mostly pre-menstrual), but ten of those do me fine, and the bag lasts for months.

I think the deprivation thing is why most diets fail. If I feel like eating something, I will. I try to come up with alternatives to the high-fat or high-calorie stuff, or just have small amounts, but deprivation leads to craving.

harpy61 commented on

An image of atropa777 Cricket, this is a gem And I dont see how you can really work around (attraction preferences). How anyone can work around that.

That's the whole point. It's perfectly alright for people to be disgusted by the sight of fat bodies. It's just fine to be disgusted by small breasts. What's not ok is spreading that disgust and hate around unsolicited and tell fat people or small-breasted women, or what the fuck ever, that they need to change because they're not attractive. Well, attractive to who? And why do they need to change to suit someone who isn't attracted to them in the first place? Why should they hate that part of themselves simply because someone else does?

atropa777 commented on

An image of cricketsmack Absolutely.

cricketsmack commented on

An image of wimsey70 Hear hear, atropa. That's all we're saying, cricket. It's all right not to be attracted to us. It's not, however, okay to then send us unsolicited hate mail, or leave us hateful comments about how unattractive that is. Well, I'm not attracted to people who smoke, or people who like to tan, and both of those are unhealthy behaviors. But I don't go around sending hate mail to smokers or tanners about how disgusting they are, and certainly I would be reviled if I did so. Why, then, is it acceptable to tell us how ugly we are, and how noone will find us attractive, and if they do, they're somehow freaks?

wimsey70 commented on

An image of cricketsmack ...since when did I become the opposition?

cricketsmack commented on

An image of wimsey70 Err... sorry, didn't mean to make you feel like you were being picked on. I was addressing your comments, but expanding on them to address a larger issue.

wimsey70 commented on

An image of sfguyyy Excellent post! More in a sec...

sfguyyy commented on

An image of sfguyyy Most has already been said, but this is a subject that is not only important to me for the usual social justice reasons, but also because I have been around and/or involved in some BBW communities over the years. I think it's also good to see that women are not the only ones who can write extensively on this. :P

Below is a repost of my comment made in SistrMryLazarus's journal, upon the arrival of the usual fat-bashing trolls:

.......

Ah, so I see the Trench Coat Mafia has arrived. How lucky we are.

A couple of little points:

1) The definition of "obese" is hardly settled, indeed in the USA it has been a moving target for years. The US government has changed it several times, with the trend being increasingly thinner. http://www.ajcn.org/cgi/content/full/72/5/1074

2) If we had to make a list of all of the things that people in this society do that endangers their health, we could write for days. Yet certain small-minded, petty individuals who have nothing better to do like to focus on the weight issue as if it is a reflection of someone's character, as if someone who is heavy affects their personal quality-of-life. Nothing could be further from the truth. (unless they happen to have shares in some clothing manufacturer that only serves thin people)

3) One must question the motivation of the fat-haters. Ask them why they spend their time and energy on lecturing people who don't meet their BMI criteria. Does anyone really believe that their motivation stems from anything other than a desire to ridicule others?

4) Yes, western society is getting fatter, this is a result of a combination of factors, not least include the sedentary lifestyle at home and work, now made possible thanks to technological advances. This affects everyone. Yes, there is a loose correlation of mortality with severe obesity, but then again, you find these correlations with many things, including heredity, family life, the neighborhood you live in, the type of employment you choose, how much stress is in your life, and many others.

If the "fat haters" were sincerely interested in "helping" people, they wouldn't spend most of their time and energy they devote to such "altruistic" endeavors ridiculing people who don't meet their BMI criteria and trying to make them feel subhuman. Secondly, one would expect that we'd hear about them lobbying their municipal and congressional representatives to remove junkfood from schools, stop junkfood advertising targeting young children, institute workplace rules that stipulate minimal levels of time away from desks and computers, laws limiting daily television and other electronic device exposure time for children, etc etc etc. This "one trick pony" approach reveals that the real intent isn't to help anyone, but rather to seek to entertain themselves with adolescent-style bullying games.

.......

sfguyyy commented on

An image of serenejournal May I worship you, atropa?

serenejournal commented on

Default user image Here's me thinking it's really stupid to be disgusted by any kind of body. Why invest the energy? I realize most people have preferences, but I don't see the point in getting knickers twisted about what is not prefered.

A former user commented on

An image of wimsey70 By the way, cricket, the reason I didn't stop by your journal and compliment your photo (which was cool) was that I saw the bashing direction of the comments and figured you were mocking us.

wimsey70 commented on

Default user image Good point about the term "obese" sfguyy. I've been meaning to get to that.

A former user commented on

An image of madoo This really is the best explanation of the position that I have seen. All those obese-person-photo posts that led to this one didn't seem to strike the right tone w.r.t. what was being endorsed.

I admit that I am not that tolerant of widespread acceptance of being fat, or rather, being obese (I am equally intolerant of the stick-thin-is-the-only-way-to-be-beautiful view). By acceptance, I mean the thinking that it's perfectly OK to be like that over the long term. By and large, medically-defined obesity is unhealthy and will lead to early death and put more stress on medical systems. The increasing prevalence of bariatric surgery as a solution, while effective, is frightening, because people are effectively maiming themselves in an effort to lose weight, despite the fact that the dietary and activity changes that precede the surgery normally lead to significant weight loss on their own.

Granted, the medical definition of obese occasionally gets it wrong - most of NZ's infamous rugby team would be overweight if not obese, but then they're professional athletes. If you are, by all means, ignore the BMI. Most people aren't.

85% of people with Type II diabetes are classified as overweight or obese - it has some serious complications of its own. Heart disease, a major (if not the major) cause of death, has obesity as one of its primary risk factors. There are a number of other complications: http://www.obesityinamerica.org/complications.html. Sure, someone can be obese and otherwise healthy, but I'd say the majority of obese people aren't.

A person who has eaten more energy than they output and become overweight or obese should accept their body, yes. They should also accept, as I do, that they are the cause of this happening - they can't all have metabolic disorders! For me, at least, my BMI of 26.5 (= overweight) is because I am lazy. I do not enjoy exercise but I have plenty of time in which to do it. I eat a very crappy diet. I also see kids at school having 1.5L of sugary drink for breakfast, or pigging out on chips and pies at lunch, and I think they are doomed - dooomed, I tell you! - if they already eat like that at their young age. Whatever happened to good old sandwiches?

I don't go around being scathing towards fat, overweight or obese people merely because they are fat, overweight or obese. That's a lame reason to pick on someone, and hardly helpful, as is better said in the OP.

I do, however, privately wonder how the more extremely obese people could possibly have let themselves get that fat, especially when it really starts to impinge on their ability to move or, say, even get out of bed (I'm thinking half-tonne man here).

As for all the weight-loss TV shows, I applaud The Biggest Loser (and, in NZ, Downsize Me), for showing that significant weight loss is possible merely with changes in diet and exercise (albeit extreme exercise!). The ones that involve (prohibitively expensive) surgery I am less enamoured of, as they are not practical solutions for most people, especially those who become fat through reliance on cheap foods.

madoo commented on

An image of madoo I'm gradually making my way through the links, btw, and they are v. good.

madoo commented on

An image of atropa777 Serene, I am a mere mortal, not worthy of being worshiped ;) Eve, I agree that it seems like a useless waste of energy directing hate at something rather than reveling in what you like. But nonetheless, there are people out there who are revolted at the sight of fat. That's ok. All they have to do is keep their mouth shut about it and not try to foist their hate and disgust onto others.

Thank you, sfguy, for pointing out that part of the reason behind the "obesity epidemic" is that "obesity" is a moving, shrinking target. And wimsey, for bringing up a great point. Not only did I not comment in your thread until well after the fact, but didn't even see cricket's because it wasn't linked off of harpy's journal. Plus, I'm not quite sure why we were expected to show up on a thread to support someone who wasn't showing anyone else support.

And lastly, I hope it doesn't go without saying that agreeing with this thread and the ones written by pkcose and mookMJK are mutually exclusive. No one can both agree that 'obesity is inherently unhealthy' and that fat does not exclude fit.

atropa777 commented on

An image of atropa777 Madoo, here's the problem. You can't tell by looking if someone's fat because they have a metabolic disorder, depression, are recovering from anorexia or bulimia, suffered an immobilizing illness, or just choose not to exercise. So why bother assuming anything at all? It's pointless unless you know the person.

As for biggest loser, I think it's great that people get more physically fit on national tv. Fantastic. The problem is, they vote off people who are still getting fitter, but aren't losing enough weight. That makes the primary goal "lose weight" instead of "be fit." Again, obsession with thinness. And lastly, there are so many different experts that believe different things when it comes to how to eat, and how to exercise that it's either a matter of luck or incredible perception to wade through the bullshit and find the "right" way that's both safe and effective for free. It's much easier to pay someone (actually, more like a team of doctors, dieticians, and trainers) who you trust to personally coach you through the process. Health care like that is restricted to reality show contestants, and the middle and upper classes.

atropa777 commented on

Default user image Thanks Atropa.....after reading some of the posts yesterday I was quite disgusted....but I just read this and for a 23 year old, you made a lot of sense in this post and I do hope people see it the way its represented.

Atta girl ......proud of you, keep it up!!

gazelleeyes37 commented on

An image of harpy61 Madoo I, too, look at massively obese people and wonder how they could have let themselves get that way. Then I stand back and think, "But other people probably see ME and say 'how did she let herself get that way?'" As a sociologist, I look at how people in stigmatized groups resist being 'othered' by saying, "well, those things apply to other people in the stigmatized group, but I'm not like that." I also doubt whether people who are so big they are unable to move around are happy with themselves, and I don't think it's a problem of fat acceptance.

I know how I got to be fat. Or rather, I've never been not fat. If you put on a pound a week, that's 50 lbs in a year, and 2 years later you are 100lbs heavier than when you started, which will likely put anyone into the obese category. I reached my heaviest weight about 20 years ago, actually. It hasn't been a constant upwards journey for me. I weigh myself regularly, and know that my weight can fluctuate by a couple of pounds in a day. I know that includes water and waste etc, but it's interesting nonetheless.

As far as health goes, what a lot of people seem to miss is that it is a continuum, not an absolute state. Most people have some health problems, and some people need daily medication to maintain their health at a reasonable level. I'm lucky in that I don't. As a cancer survivor, I have my health indicators measured on a fairly regular basis, and they are good. I don't have problems with blood pressure, diabetes, cholesterol etc. I could stand to take more exercise, but my basic exercise levels are reasonably good, because I walk a lot in my daily life, I don't have a car. I have occasional back problems, and achy knees sometimes (partly due to an accident years ago, and my history as an archeologist, but I'm sure exacerbated by the weight). I'm not unconcerned with my health, and I am taking active steps to improve it (including losing weight).

Part of the reason I am able to lose weight is because I'm happy and confident in the rest of my life. My friends love me and accept me, and my 'weight' is not an issue. I am NOT fat harpy, I'm smart harpy, I'm harpy who is funny and sometimes outrageous, I'm harpy who 'knows everything' (said in an amused and awed way), I'm harpy who will help you out if she is able, I'm harpy who is a good cook. I am not defined by my weight, and I never will be. But my weight is not anything to be ashamed of, either. The things I am ashamed of is when I let people down, or when I don't live up to my standards for myself. The rest of me, I'm quite proud of.

harpy61 commented on

An image of harpy61 And, I'm particularly ashamed when my verb doesn't agree with my noun!

harpy61 commented on

An image of atropa777 It's also a compounding problem. Because once someone's approaching immobilization weight, their hips, knees, and ankles are strained to the max and exercise becomes just getting out of bed. To which I've heard "get in a pool and exercise that way" but that requires both regular access to a pool, and enough self-confidence to put on a bathing suit and get in that pool when others might see them in a swim suit -- and not hide their disgusted looks, or yell out insults, or throw things. It takes a lot of courage for those people just to go out in public and face that kind of harassment and judgment every day.

atropa777 commented on

An image of Eavocative *Sits and glows at Atropa and Harpy*

I have so much to learn from each of you!

Eavocative commented on

Default user image I'm really glad you've linked to this post, as I'm sending the URL to men who write and give me diet advice.

A former user commented on

An image of atropa777 Eve_l, I'll keep comment notification turned on just for your unsolicited advisers, but the kind of people who offer unsolicited advice about diet and exercise are the kind of assholes who are too cowardly to say anything when they're rebuffed. :)

atropa777 commented on

An image of CatalinaVanilla Atropa, thanks so much for starting this thread! I appreciate it so much! I was wondering for the girls who posted that they get hate mail - do you mean on OKC? I get plenty of comments in real life but not one yet here.

CatalinaVanilla commented on

An image of atropa777 Comment disappearing syndrome strikes again :(

Catalinavanilla, I know at least Eve_L and wimsey, and probably the other people posting about hate mail have received it here. So have I. Funnily enough, I've never gotten comments in person.

atropa777 commented on

An image of harpy61 I used to get negative comments sometimes from teenaged boys in the street years ago, but can't remember the last time I got in person negative comments about my size. I suspect that is because as a middle-aged woman you become pretty invisible to the young guys who think it's fun to comment. Oh, I forgot, I did get some abuse from guys passing me in a car and catcalling last year. I guess they felt that being in a moving vehicle gave them the same kind of protection that being at the other end of a computer does to similar immature fratboy guys here.

harpy61 commented on

An image of onehalfspin I'm personally getting sick of people telling me to accept my body and claiming that I am not fat. I have gained 15-20 pounds in the last two years, because my metabolism has slowed, I've been eating worse/more, and I have been getting less exercise. I am not physically fit anymore.

I'm not just ashamed of my body, I'm at high risk for health problems. Type II diabetes runs in my family. Everyone who is significantly fat in my family has it. If you want to tell me there is no link between being fat and getting diabetes, go right ahead. I also have joint problems, and the more I weigh, the worse it is for my already bad joints.

Two things have kept me on my current "diet," and that's being ashamed of my body and fear of developing health complications. If one more person tells me that my body is fine the way it is, I will probably punch them in the face.

onehalfspin commented on

An image of filmgirl81 onehalfspin, finally speaking my language. I could give a fuck about anyone else's body, but I hate the extra weight on me. It looks gross. also the diabetes thing runs in my fam

filmgirl81 commented on

An image of onehalfspin That Kate Harding blog you linked to bothers me. It links to another blog, the junkfoodscience one, and that one is just making me see warning flags all over.

It is defending the obesity paradox, where people who are obese have higher survival rates for chronic diseases, like heart disease. But this blog also claims that being obese has nothing at all to do with heart disease. Hmmm. Sure. People who are obese have much higher rates of chronic diseases. They may be more likely to survive a heart attack, but they're also much more likely to have a heart attack.

I really DO think people need to be much, much more accepting of their bodies and themselves and all that, but I really think that you linked to a few things with some shady science.

onehalfspin commented on

An image of onehalfspin onehalfspin, finally speaking my language.

Yeah I know I usually disagree with EVERYTHING you say!

onehalfspin commented on

An image of Misanihilist I think a balance needs to be struck between acceptance but being realistic when it comes to this. I don't see much argument in favor of being overweight, but extreme negativity regarding it typically makes everything worse - whether that negativity comes from the self or others.

...got depressed... or just don't have the time or money to exercise because they're poor and working for food and shelter is more important than running 5 miles a day.

I think this in particular is important. When people are dealing with problems in other areas of their life their health often suffers. Paris Hilton is an "ideal" form not because she possesses IRON WILL, (pffffft) but because she hasn't a care in the world to sap her energy and foul her mood. The last thing people need when they're dealing with stress is more stress in the form of abuse.

When the fat haters start kicking people while they're down, they know intuitively it's to cause harm and, hopefully, keep people inferior even as they claim it's "for their own good" to convince themselves they aren't acting like petty shitbags.

Also, in case some one didn't say it, BMI isn't intended to be one size fits all. It's specifically noted it isn't intended for atheletes since muscle throws the numbers.

Misanihilist commented on

An image of wimsey70 I'm glad shaming works on you. But does that give you the right to go around shaming other people? Do you think that shaming is really a good incentive for everyone?

I think atropa's main point was that it's really not that simple. Fat is not necessarily equal to unhealthy (I come from tall, heavy peasant stock myself. My grandparents lived into their 90's, and we have no family history of heart disease or diabetes). Lots of thin people are unhealthy. In the end, what we should all be striving for is the best possible health, while accepting that we're okay the way we are now.

I'm glad shaming works for you. All it does is piss me off. I can like how I look now, and still strive to live a healthier life as best I can, and telling me I'm ugly isn't going to be productive any way. All it does is make me think less of you.

And, in the end, fat-shamers know nothing about my life, my health problems, and my challenges, unless they read my journal. Which they wouldn't, because they automatically think I'm unworthy of their time and energy because I'm overweight.

wimsey70 commented on

An image of onehalfspin I'm glad shaming works on you. But does that give you the right to go around shaming other people?

It's only shaming myself that works. It's awful for people to go around calling people "fatty boombalatties", and I do think the media influence both women and men, contributing to unrealistic perceptions of normality. No one ever calls me fat (I've hidden my weight very well, though I've gone up in pant-sizes rapidly), but if they did, I'd be upset in some way.

I want to stress that I was NOT advocating shaming people into losing weight.

And to add to what bronzy said, there all also a lot of people out there who are obese because they have a combination of low incomes and little access to healthy food, often coupled with poor nutrition education. They aren't making excuses, they're more like victims of multiple circumstances.

And there also needs to be a distinction made here between fat and obese. Or maybe "chubby' and obese, or something. Besides the blogs that were linked to, I challenge anyone to find credible medical/scientific evidence that being OBESE or beyond is not unhealthy.

And being mega-obese has got to be just awful, even without having to find any scientific evidence. I can't for the life of me imagine that being 5'10" and 300 lbs doesn't mean you're not healthy.

onehalfspin commented on

An image of LuLuDerErdgeist Thank you bronzi. There was a time after my injury where I was unable to exercise. I still remained on the diet (or eating choice) is was on. When I was given a list of alternatives to exercising, I was very happy. I can walk, even a light jog, h20 aerobics and eventually light yoga. I found all kinds of exercise programs for people like me, who have been injured and/or are in chronic pain. There are alternatives. My husband and I take dance classes.

I miss not being able to Fence, Take Tai Chi, Ivengyar (sp) yoga, and Judo. But I do enjoy these other classes. We have a common bond. We want to get better and stronger. We don't want to have a pity party about our pain and blame our weight gain on our injury. There are ex atheletes, Senior Citizens, Ice Skaters, all kinds of people in my classes.

At 26 I started a new medication. I was 5-7 and had a waist size of 22. I was curvy but thin. The medication made me so sedated I was too tired to do anything. I went from Fencing and training 6 days a week to sleeping most of the time. I gained 50 pounds

Then I moved to SF to go to school. I walked everywhere. I took Public Transit too, but more walking than anything else. Up steep hills. I walked probably 2-3 miles a day, maybe more. And I lost all that weight.

I am still not at the ideal weight I would like to be (I did put on my honeymoon 25 ;). But I am working on it. Instead of turning my injury into an excuse, I am trying to defy it.

LuLuDerErdgeist commented on

An image of bronzcowgrl I just can't fathom people who don't want to work their asses off to be the best possible human being they can be.

I guess some people's opinion of being the best they can be has absolutely no physical quantifiers, but for myself I would be seriously disappointed if I was so unhealthy that I couldn't play tag with my friends' kids in the park, or go kayaking when my roommate invites me out with her, or go hiking in the Rockies to see the beauty of places you can't drive to.

bronzcowgrl commented on

An image of SatanLuciferi Yes, you can, Bronzi. You said yourself, DENIAL. You were in it once and it's not easy to break out of it. Some do. Some never will and like their excuses and their sad little lives.

Decide, commit, succeed, every single day, each day, as if it was the first time.

SatanLuciferi commented on

An image of LuLuDerErdgeist Bronzi-that is why I am so adamant about exercising. It's frustrating to go from being very strong and active, to not being able to pick up a gallon of milk with my left hand/arm. I know I will never be back to 'normal' but I want to at least try and get as close as I can.

My dear friend and hairdresser had breast cancer and in turn, had a mastectomy. They told her she could never lift her arm past her shoulder. She was having none of that. Now she can bench press over 50 pounds. That's pretty damn good.

LuLuDerErdgeist commented on

An image of Mote_already I dont really have anything to add, I think the post said it well enough. Sorry I didnt come across it sooner, atropa. :)

Mote_already commented on

Default user image A few years ago, I had a tumor the size of a watermelon removed from my abdomen. But, for years before it was discovered and taken care of, I looked fat. I had no idea what it was and just thought I was fat.

A healthy diet and exercise didn't work (ldo) so I starved myself. I intentionally went on week-long drug binges so that I wouldn't be hungry or notice if I was. Every time I looked in the mirror, I hated what I saw. And really, I was fucking grotesque-looking.

I don't know what my point is, other than I know what it's like to have this enormous social pressure to look a certain way, and to internalize that pressure, and still not be able to fix it, for whatever reason. Sucks.

A former user commented on

An image of bronzcowgrl Yes, SL, but even in the heights of my "I don't know why my body is getting weird on me" denial, I still knew something was wrong and I still knew I had to do something about it. It took me a while to realize exactly what about my lifestyle had to change because I had never lived differently, but it was common sense once I thought about it.

Net negative calories. Either eat a LOT less, exercise a LOT more, or (ideally) a moderate blend of the two. I have gone down 3 sizes since then, and will probably squeak out one more if I keep up the exercise routine I am on.

I know you're a huge advocate of just getting up and DOING the exercise because you're like me, you're stubborn and driven. What I don't understand is people who realize they should eat less/exercise more to lose weight, want to lose weight, and yet change nothing.

bronzcowgrl commented on

An image of bronzcowgrl A healthy diet and exercise didn't work (ldo)

...and this is the big/only problem I have with social pressure to lose weight. If a healthy diet and exercise aren't helping you to lose weight, this should NOT be something that spurs people into bulimia in order to fit a specific mold. It should be a red flag that you need to contact your doctor to either a) see what is wrong with your strategy or b) see what is wrong with you, because if diet/exercise don't work, then it is because one of those two things is broken.

It makes me sad that people are feeling pressure to lose weight because of aesthetics (my personal opinions on beauty aside). They should be wanting to lose weight because of how good their body will feel when it is able to do aerobic and anaerobic activity with ease, when there is less stress on joints, etc...

bronzcowgrl commented on

An image of wimsey70 Wow, my earlier post was shrill. I'm sorry about that. I should not post when I'm tired, it's the end of the workday so I'm rushing out, and I'm already upset about something else.

I cannot, and will not, speak for anyone else. I do think there are often complicated factors that go into weight gain, including not only the things that onehalfspin mentioned, but also things like a suburban sprawl-based society where everyone spends far too many hours a day in their cars, a culture obsessed with the scheduling of children's lives, which leads to a lot of parents who spend their lives chauffeuring around their children, and many other things.

That said, I have no such excuse. I am trying to exercise more, for my own personal health. Not because I think I am not attractive and sexy, but because I know it's the right thing to do in my continued quest to be a better person. But it's a very complicated psychological issue for someone who's had lifelong health problems that are often aggravated further by exercise, and who has dealt with a lot of psychological abuse on the subject of exercise.

If anyone is actually interested in some frank journal entries about my struggle with this issue, they are here:

My medical issues: http://tinyurl.com/5f783k

My struggle with exercise: http://tinyurl.com/65dpsp

Just one person's viewpoint.

wimsey70 commented on

An image of sfguyyy Europe is in the middle of an obesity epidemic too. On the whole they may not be as bad off as USians, but I attribute that in large measure to the carte-blanche US corporations get to promote all sorts of unhealthy products and lifestyles here without a peep from (particularly the current) government.

For example, in England it is AGAINST THE LAW for a company to advertise sugary, unhealthy food on shows targeted to young children. The USA is so in the pocket of the corporate interests that the government by-and-large wants nothing to do with getting involved in advocating for the health of the citizenry when it comes into conflict with the big corporate food interests, for example. During the Bush regime, they have undertaken all sorts of actions to undermine the legitimate health interests of the citizenry, including pre-empting an excellent standard for organic food in California with a crappier federal standard that, among other things, allows producers to call their products "organic" even though they've been irradiated, and if I'm not mistaken, genetically-engineered. We also have a federal labeling standard for trans-fats which is the weakest in the world, whereby a company can claim "0 grams trans fat per serving" even though there are very measureable amounts which if one had 2-3 servings it could easily reach harmful levels. Examples of this sort of thing abound.

The vast majority of haters that sit around in places like OkCupid and browbeat heavy people trying to make them feel bad have absolutely no history, background or credentials when it comes to advocating for public health issues. They are basically bullies, plain-and-simple. They get away with it because fat people are the new "niggers". Once upon a time people wouldn't stand up to defend and African-American from abuse from whites, today much the same holds true for fat people.

As wimsey said, you don't motivate human-beings by abusing them day in and day out. If the haters had any real compassion for people, rather than simply wanting to bully them, they would show a tiny iota of compassion for a person's individual challenges, rather than simply sitting there spending inordinate amounts of time shooting off their mouth trying to make people miserable. (The sick corollary of this is that there is another category of person that they are really speaking to here - the ones who will publicly or privately applaud them for this. I'm convinced that to some extent they are attempting to ingratiate themselves with this crowd, the ones who publicly or privately say "fat people are lazy, gross jerks who don't deserve to breathe air".)

sfguyyy commented on

An image of wimsey70 I just wanted to say that one thing that kills about the fat-shamers on OKCupid is that many of them are smokers.

I just find that the ultimate in hypocrisy.

wimsey70 commented on

An image of atropa777 Wimsey, I'm not nearly as nice as you are, so I'll chuckle a tiny bit when they get lung cancer. I hope it's small cell, guys. Then the chances are good it'll metastasize to the brain. I wish smokers would think about that the next time they light up. Especially around a child.

As for fat = cardiovascularly unfit, that's about as solid as the abortion= increased risk of breast cancer connection. As the study linked to in the post shows, cardiovascular fitness is correlated with life expectancy, not body fat percentage. If you have a problem with that study, take it up with JAMA. If anyone has a more recent article that refutes the JAMA article, please feel free to link to it. Your common sense say-so doesn't count. Oh, and cholesterol and other lipid levels in blood serum are a result of liver function, which can be affected by drug use, stress, recent alcohol use, medications, and genetic variance of enzyme function, among other things.

atropa777 commented on

An image of SatanLuciferi In the article, there's no direct information as to the baseline measurement of cardio fitness except saying the bottom 20 percent. I would like to know what that measurement is, just to know.

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/116277.php

This link is far more interesting as to costs on the healthcare system. While I agree that fit is what's important, I also know that most overweight/obese people are not fit, period. There are exceptions, but they are generally not the rule. I don't care what someone does with their life, it is their life, but I don't think highly of someone who complains about their weight and does nothing as I think that's disingenuous. I completely respect someone who says I'm ok with myself and I'll do what I need to and does just that.

SatanLuciferi commented on

An image of sfguyyy Most people are simply not successful at everything they would wish to be successful at. Thus I think many people vastly oversimplify the complexity of overcoming these sorts of challenges. It's easy for someone else to say "just do it" - I'll bet there's all sorts of aspects in the lives of those who throw stones where they don't practice what they preach either.

For example, there are lots of people in way over their head financially in the USA. How easy it would be to start singling out everyone who had a bunch of credit cards maxxed out and say "You're such a loser, just pay off your debts and make more money, you lazy ass!".

The reason why you can't easily do the same random criticism of debtors is because people don't carry around a big sign attached to their body that says "I'm $50,000 in debt on my credit cards" or "I defaulted on my car loan". But fat people do carry evidence of their particular challenge around for everyone to see, which makes them a much easier target for sanctimonious jerkoffs.

sfguyyy commented on

An image of atropa777 SL, the paper says Participants' fitness levels were measured using a treadmill exercise which means an exercise stress test was used. If you want acceptable ranges on stress test measurements, I can get those, but I don't have reference manuals in front of me at home, so it'll be a few days.

atropa777 commented on

An image of bronzcowgrl For example, there are lots of people in way over their head financially in the USA. How easy it would be to start singling out everyone who had a bunch of credit cards maxxed out and say "You're such a loser, just pay off your debts and make more money, you lazy ass!".

I fail to see why it is bad to look down on people for shit like this. If you only make $30k a year, but you spend $40k a year, that is undisciplined and not an intelligent choice. I live my life without credit cards at all, and I paid off my student loan yesterday (yay!) without any financial aid from outside sources. In my opinion, people are too quick to blame circumstances "beyond their control" for almost everything.

I also know that most overweight/obese people are not fit, period. There are exceptions, but they are generally not the rule.

Exactly. It is entirely possible that a severely overweight person might have a higher level of cardiovascular health than I do, but it is not likely and probably not common. I would be willing to compete in a foot race with 10 people who are seriously overweight and I would be incredibly surprised if more than one of them beat me.

bronzcowgrl commented on

An image of Borogovian Maybe you could beat 9/10 bronz, but that doesn't mean the average, lazy, malnourished shinny kid is going to do as well as that.

Actually I find it quite interesting that some body types can stay heavier while doing more exercise and eating better than others who live on processed foods and the couch. Just food for thought. Should these body types push themselves beyond a healthy range so as to achieve the thinness our society deems desirable? I guess that all depends on who you ask.

Borogovian commented on

An image of Two-Step P.P.S. I would be willing to compete in a foot race with 10 people who are seriously overweight and I would be incredibly surprised if more than one of them beat me.

I would be willing to compete in a three-way foot race with any living overfat (man w/ > 25% bodyfat, woman with > 30% bodyfat) human in the world and a hungry, angry bear. Which is to say, I am more than willing to bet my life that it will not be me who gets eaten.

The reason being that I am at 6% body fat, and can maintain a 15mph pace a hell of a lot longer than a grizzly can, and am also considerably faster than both the bear and the fatty when running downhill - because they are fat/hunchbacked. (Yes, I have thought this through carefully. Is there some other way to spend a Saturday morning?)

Excuses are lovely, but they will not help you survive in the wild.

Two-Step commented on

An image of atropa777 I know this may come as a shock to some people, but this is not a troll-friendly journal. If you can't address the topic (like say, talking about how all the fattiez complain about their weight and don't do anything about it, when NO ONE IS COMPLAINING ABOUT THEIR WEIGHT HERE BUT YOU), or, you know, read the comments before you so as to not make an ass out of yourself, then it'll be deleted and or blocked.

This is not your soapbox to hear yourself think. That's your own journal. No more comments from journal regulars, please. If you avoided commenting here in january, you should stick with that instinct and keep avoiding it now.

atropa777 commented on

An image of bronzcowgrl Firstly, I have no idea why Two-Step's comments were deleted. I have them all in my Favorite's list and don't see anything troll-y about them.

Secondly:

Maybe you could beat 9/10 bronz, but that doesn't mean the average, lazy, malnourished shinny kid is going to do as well as that.

I thought we were talking about the average "fit" person vs. the average "fat" person, for the sake of comparison? I would have to go do more research but think the number of people who are seriously underweight is pretty small in proportion to the population.

Actually I find it quite interesting that some body types can stay heavier while doing more exercise and eating better than others who live on processed foods and the couch. Just food for thought. Should these body types push themselves beyond a healthy range so as to achieve the thinness our society deems desirable?

What makes you think it would take exercise/diet beyond a healthy range to maintain a lower weight? A slower metabolism is not a dead metabolism.

If you avoided commenting here in january, you should stick with that instinct and keep avoiding it now.

Generally I avoid these types of posts. I find that unless a commenter's viewpoint is the same as yours atropa, even if the argument is phrased carefully and researched, the person ends up being labeled as a troll and a fatty-hater. That is simply not the case, but it seems that it is far too easy to pigeonhole people in this way.

bronzcowgrl commented on

An image of atropa777 I deleted and or blocked comments that mentioned how fat people complain about their weight, because not one fat person was complaining about it here until august 8th. And then, it was two males saying that they found their own bodies disgusting/were ashamed of their bodies at their current weights. Making a false argument isn't going to earn you any points around here.

And MissN emailed me an article on yahoo back on the 12th http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080812/ap_on_he_me/med_healthy_obesity which refers to this article published in the Archives of Internal Medicine http://tinyurl.com/6z9emh

That article states that basically, 23% of adults over 20 with a "normal" BMI had cardiac risk factors, 50% of adults with a BMI in the "overweight" category were very healthy from a cardiovascular perspective, along with ~31% of adults with a BMI falling under "obese."

atropa777 commented on

An image of atropa777 Let's also not forget that Brad fucking Pitt is overweight according to BMI measurements.

atropa777 commented on

An image of FrancescaSF Thanks for this. . . so lovely to see someone else verbalize this. Waaaay too much body shame around. I grew up with a visual artist/sculptor who also happened to be a large woman and an all-around great person. . . I was large too, but was trained from the get-go to see the human form in sculptural terms -- to be amazed and excited by the variations and shapes and textures, the sags, the scars, the pudges, and bored by plastic perfection. . . every body a sculpture. Unfortunately recent and past events have masked that intelligence about my body and while -I- can see that in the bodies of others, I have no faith that others will see it in my body. . . it's too bad. I almost feel that I'm looking down on others by not acknowledging that they could have that sensibility too -- but every day I see anti-fat sentiment and am shot down again. Good luck to all!

FrancescaSF commented on