Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Due to unforseen circumstances I came here on an airplane when I
was eight years old. Here used to be Taiwan, and then it was
Connecticut. Now here is Canada. It's pretty all right here. Back
home the trees don't change colors and pretend to die. My fingers
don't get frostbite and blacken. The milk doesn't stay fresh so
If I don't go to graduate school then I have to enlist in the
military back in Taiwan. That's how it works over there. Fascists.
Just kidding about the fascism. I get universal healthcare. It's
like five bucks to go to the dentist's.
My grandmother doesn't have to go to the dentist anymore. No teeth
left. She had a stroke when she was 68, then she grew smaller and
smaller and then impossibly smaller. It's been ten years, and she
is dry skin draped over brittle bones now. A wind could carry her
away like a kite whose string has broken, my grandmother kite.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I doze off during class sometimes, and in my dreams I am a
mathematical genius. I walk very slowly in the dream because I have
about twenty professors hanging on my pantlegs, begging me to work
on their research.
I don't have a job. Sometimes I buy lottery tickets. That is almost
like having a job. One time I won $900 dollars at roulette. I write
a lot of stories that don't have endings. The people stop talking
one day and the cats wander off through doors left open like blank
Currently trying to write a movie. It's going really slowly, like
an iceberg. That's how you know it's going to be really good. All
the good parts are under water, invisible to the Titanic of your
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Picking out books you'd like, beating children at Tetris,
pretending to read in a cafe, making you orgasm with my hands,
memorizing facts about marine animals.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My indefatigable spirit and lack of faith in the future of
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
This is something we can talk about on a walk to the bagel shop,
unless you're into raisin bagels. If you like raisin breadstuffs
I'll unfortunately be obliged to push you into oncoming traffic.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
This section was stupid, is now about
THE THINGS I DESPISE:
1. People who try to enter an elevator before people get out.
2. DHL Canada.
3. Mayonnaise in my sandwich.
4. Laptop speakers at full volume.
5. The cat ate a mouse on my bed. Why. Don't do this.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Reasons for staying awake, touching, breathing, quantum gravity, P
vs NP, my regrets, the accumulation of the infinitesimal, how to
write down this moment, girls, the structure of time, evolutionary
biology, the logistics of spending the day in bed.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The cat and I drink from the same glass. I don't wash my jeans all
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You are sleep deprived. You like the sea.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.