I am an outgoing introvert. Often friendly with complete strangers, as I try spread a little good will in a world that can feel cold and harsh. However, I can also be quiet and withdrawn among friends at a party, preferring to play the piano in the corner, rather than engage in small talk.
I can be logical and analytical, a thinker, yet those things never rule me. I am happiest when I am in the moment and untethered from my logical mind. Laughing, Playing, Feeling, Loving and Connecting are not logical endeavors, and I can freely flip from one hemisphere of the brain to the other, without much trouble.
I have a tremendous capacity for non-judgement and forgiveness. It is all about one's intentions. We all can be less than artful at times, but if your intentions are good, then you and I are good. And, if you cut me an inch of slack, I will give you miles. On the other hand, if you take pleasure is ridiculing others, deserving or not, you will likely find that I won't be playing along with you. Rational criticism is welcome. But, it is not a blood sport for me.
I love absurdity, the non-sequitur and inexplicable humor.
I relish competing in games and sports, yet I don't care if I win or lose, and often lose track of the score.
I am proud of my accomplishments out in the world (some fairly impressive), yet I am the last person to toot that horn.
I am a mature adult male who takes seriously all those things that come with adulthood, but I still completely relate to the inner kid who wants to balance atop a boulder, skip rocks, or build sand castles at the beach. (And I am not ashamed to go ahead and do those things.)
I always need some sort of creative project (usually music, but it can also be a drawing or some writing), yet the result of the endeavor might be tossed away after it has been toiled with to be 'just right'.
I'm very into aesthetics and design and can have strong opinions what works with someone's creation, yet my personal appearance is often far from fashionable or well groomed. (Although I do have great hygiene, and can "clean up" nicely when I need to)
I'm the person who can remember precise details from an event many years ago, but who can't remember where his cell phone is while he is talking into it. (True that.)
I am non-materialistic. While I greatly appreciate a nice gift, especially when it makes me look a bit more stylish, I can just as easily feel like a gift is a burden, if it is something that will just add clutter to my simple life. (Even while I truly appreciate the sentiment behind the gift.).
A stoic who tries to bottle irrational emotions for fear of losing control… a sucker for heart string tugs in cheesy TV commercials... an effusive musical performer who loves to lose control while in public on stage.
An avoider of conflict, who will never back down from his principles and isn't afraid to get in someone face if I have to. (Although I never feel good after a confrontation, even if I prevail.)
I hate arguing, yet I love intellectual or political or philosophical discussions where differences of opinion are probed.
I can come across as arrogant, yet I am actually humble, and don't feel that anyone is above anyone else.
I believe that the character of a person is the only thing that SHOULD really matter, yet I can't help feeling disheartened by the fact that there ain't as much hair sprouting out of the top of my head than there once was. "Oh, where have you gone, beautiful tresses?" And to add insult to injury... hair sprouting out of other places I would prefer it not to. Sigh. (I warned you about "warts and all".) The good news, I would think, is that I love smile lines around a woman's eyes. A few extra pounds is not a big deal. I have a some of those myself at the moment. (Maybe we will shed those pounds doing an activity together. That would be great.) I want a mature woman who is at ease in her own skin, not someone who is fighting tooth and nail to preserve what's left of her former youthful glory.
I am able to pick up subtle social cues and read situations well, yet can completely stumble when it is my turn to interact.
I will boldly stand up for the disadvantaged when I observe injustice out in the world, yet I can be very self serving/preserving when I face a chaotic environment.
An ascetic minimizer of things and desires, who can become an indulgent hedonist when the urge surfaces. Although my indulgences are strictly limited experiences rather than "things".
I am very self sufficient (comes with being an introvert), and it would not be the end of the world for me, if I were to spend the rest of my life alone. Life is good. The world is beautiful. I have great friends. But, it is so much more fun to share all those things with someone special. That is the point of my being here.
If you can be easily annoyed, or are suspicious of the world, or have a tendency to point out faults in others, or have a quick temper, then I will come across as non-empathetic. I might even challenge what you are saying.
I am sometimes absent minded (head in the clouds), my intentions are always true, but I will absolutely forget to get the milk at the market at least once. If we can both laugh about this, that would be ideal. It should never be taken personally. It is not a reflection of what is in my heart, just the jumble that can exist in my brain from time to time. I will always be happy to scurry back to the market to get the forgotten item.
I don't want to be EVERYTHING to someone else, and I'm not looking for someone to be EVERYTHING to me. I am not needy, and to be truthful, I do poorly with emotionally needy people. I will be more than supportive in time of real need, but don't think I will do a good job of filling an empty void inside of someone else.
I will be your strongest ally, supporter and confidante if you will accept me "warts and all", and not judge me harshly. I will do anything you want if you ask nicely. If you become my harsh critic, I will tend to revert back to my self sufficient introvert, who finds life good and the world beautiful, and there will be distance between us. Communication is key. Letting go of the ego, and being completely honest, is hard, but I am ready for that.
I will bring the best of myself, if someone else can do the same.
Okay… congratulations! You read this far. Woo Hoo.
There's one more thing….
I am a #5 enneagram personality. I don't place a lot of currency in pop psychology, but I have to say, that enneagram just nails my personality.
If you web search "OkCupid Enneagram" you will find a personality test on this site. That test does a good job of characterizing my personality as a #5 which is know as "The Thinker" or "The Investigator" or "The Observer". You might want to check that out. Fives have good traits and not so good traits (like all personality types). The next relationship I get into, if it is a healthy one, will bring out the best traits. I'm sure of it.