I'm White. And nerdy.
(and an occasional Weird Al fan, obviously)

I'm here partially out of boredom, partially out of loyalty to the old Sparkmatch, and partially to find cool local people to hang out with. I try to be an easy going person because being otherwise creates unnecessary complications. I genuinely believe that all people are inherently good and have something to offer. That said, if you are extremely close-minded, or stupid in a highly irritating way, I still think you have something to offer, but I'll encourage you to offer it over there.

I'm really loyal to people who deserve it. I tend to be really blunt and dislike beating around the bush. Combined with the fact that I don't automatically empathize with people, this has been known to get me into trouble.

I'm fairly easily amused. Given the right company I can have a good time doing just about anything. Relentless teasing is one of my primary methods of conveying affection, and the better I know you, the more relentless I get. If you think this might bother you, stay away. I've never been good at walking on eggshells.

That's a really big question without a definite answer. I suppose I'm trying to prepare myself to jump headfirst into the Real World. I'll update when I know how that's going.

UPDATE: Student at Portland State, enjoying city life, scoffing at the east side, majoring in Psychology, minoring in Biology and Sexuality/Gender Studies, trying not to think too far beyond my bachelor's degree to avoid going crazy.

FURTHER UPDATE: Official Portland State Graduate. Woo. Any day now I'm sure they'll be sending me my shiny new 60k a year job in the mail. That's what happens when you graduate, right? If that doesn't come through I plan on running away to Europe, send me a message if you want to come with.

First of all, guys, stop listing oral sex under things you're really good at, either by stating it bluntly or just implying it. So you can get a girl off, here's a cookie, but you don't honestly think listing cunnilingus as a skill is going to bring the females a-runnin do you?

As for me: Procrastination, being anal when it comes to grammar, go kart racing, witty banter, arcade games, Dance Dance Revolution, teasing people (but only people that I like), writing too much in response to online profile questions, walking the fine line between cool and geeky, laughing uncontrollably at terrible jokes... Oh, and oral sex (ha ha).

Probably the boobs (my cleavage is like a huge magnet, sucking in eyes and dollar bills and small objects thrown by people playing NBA star), and if not that, then the bitchy look on my face, which was originally carefully assumed to ward off crazies on public transit, and now shows up subconsciously whenever I'm out alone in public. I'm working on eliminating it. I'm really a nice person, I swear.

(a) Chuck Klosterman, Neil Gaiman, Ray Bradbury, Lovecraft, Francesca Lia Block, What is Goth?, Memoirs of a Geisha, High Fidelity, The Girls Guide to Hunting and Fishing, Battle Royale, Ender's Game, Brave New World, Neil Strauss biographies (Marilyn Manson, Jenna Jameson, Motley Crue), House of leaves, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, Sin City, The Post Secret books, various crappy fantasy novels, The Divine Comedy (esp. Inferno), and pretty much all classic lit and mythology.

(b) Fight Club, Eternal Sunshine (Michel Gondry in general), Interview With the Vampire, Boondock Saints, Pulp Fiction, Ong Bak, the Protector, The 5th Element, Edward Scissorhands, Count of Monte Cristo, Cowboy BeBop, Bubble Boy, Desperado, Some Like it Hot, Pleasantville, American Beauty, Run Lola Run, Catch Me if You Can, the Mask of Zorro, Wristcutters, the Matrix, Moulin Rouge, Minority Report, The James Bond movies (Mostly Sean, Pierce, and Daniel), Ocean's Eleven, Cruel Intentions, True Romance, Tank Girl, The Kill Bills, The Crow, Garden State, Saved, Shrek 2, The Incredibles, Mallrats, The Blade Movies, SLC Punk, High Fidelity, Amelie, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Kung Fu Hustle, White Oleander, Pride and Prejudice (BBC mini series), All of the Back to the Future movies, Serenity, Sin City, V for Vendetta, Hard Candy, the Saw movies, 300, Grindhouse, most Kevin Smith and Tim Burton, John Hughes... This is really just scratching the surface, it would be easier to name movies I don't like... If I could think of any....

(c) Basement Jaxx, Bush, The Cure, Depeche Mode, Dirty Sanchez, Electric Six, The Faint, Freezepop, Frou Frou, Goldfrapp, Hellecasters, Journey, Justin Timberlake (I'm only a little ashamed), Ladytron, Lily Allen, Michele Wylen, Mindless Self Indulgence, Muse, NIN, Pink Floyd, Portishead, Postal Service, Puscifer, Queen, Sneaker Pimps, Weezer... I love most music but I tend to become obsessed with individual songs rather than pledging allegiance to certain bands/artists. Such is the tragedy of the digital music age.

(d) I am highly carnivorous, I love lebanese, chinese, and italian, and anything that wouldn't seem out of place on a breakfast menu.

Not necessarily in order:

1. An urban environment

2. My Friends

3. Noodles of some kind

4. Wikipedia (read: omniscience)

5. Physical Contact

6. Music

I'm often caught thinking about my future, money, sex, movies, my latest video game/book, the nature of opinions and stereotypes, the way people are biologically programmed in regards to relationships and sexual preference, the effects of music on mental states, and whether or not it's possible to be as objective as I'd like to think I am.

With a group of my friends, doing some activity which may include but is not limited to any combination of the following: getting drunk on delicious beer or experimental cocktails, bowling, laser tagging, playing video games, playing pool, in a movie theater, out getting dessert and coffee, in someone's living room just talking or playing music or watching movies, causing general mischief, and/or 80's dancing the night away.

I play with action figures in the bathtub.

I used to have the More Literary, More Mathematically Inclined, and More Kinky personality awards, and it secretly infuriates me that I've lost all three. I comfort myself by thinking that maybe as I get older, other people are gradually becoming more intelligent and less vanilla.

You aren't going to "wink" at me. I despise winks. They are a lame cop-out way to strike up a conversation with someone without actually putting any effort into it. If you're going to message me, just please SAY SOMETHING. I promise I'll respond (eventually...). You should also message me if you want to start a debate (friendly) or a fight (non-friendly), or if you have anything original and/or funny to say. I'm not that hard to please when it comes to electronic correspondence.