This website makes me feel like I have nothing going for myself. Everyone on here is in a MA program or working their fancy jobs and making tons of money. That's not me. I'm working and going to school but still confused about what I actually want to do in life.

I'm not really a classy lady. I cuss and drink a lot and make really crude jokes. I'm most comfortable in jeans and a hoodie, I don't dress up much. I've been told I'm funny for a girl cause I'm more like one of the guys. I'm told that I'm abrasive.I have also been told that I should do stand up, but 1. I'm too shy and 2. I feel like I only have enough material for one set. I have fun doing pretty much anything because I feel like it's all in the company that I keep. I love baseball and can be found watching the A's game most days. One of my best friends is my friends 5 year old daughter. My friends have said many times that me and Liz Lemon are the same person. I think it's pointless to make my bed cause I'm just gonna sleep in it and mess it up so soon again. I don't take myself or pretty much anything too seriously. I'm laid back so much that sometimes it's to a fault. I live in a crappy, destitute town known as Bay Point. We have nothing here besides illegal Mexicans and crackheads, which does come in handy if you want delicious tamales delivered to your door by a woman with a cooler on her head or if you're in need of heroin or someone that will help you hide a body or steal a car for under 10 bucks. But it's not an ideal place to live. I'm politically incorrect and kind of offensive. I'm a chub, I don't think my pictures show that so I just wanted to put it out there. I have big hips and a fat ass. I am an overweight smoker with hereditary hypertension. I really don't know what the fuck I'm doing here. What the fuck else am I supposed to talk about on here?

This thing is a joke, yet I continue to be on here. So what does that say about me?

Being a down ass bitch.

Working my ass off for shit money and going to school for something I don't even want to do but have invested so much time and money that I might as well fucking finish.

Fuck bitches, get money.

Making jokes that no one else gets.

Elevator wit.

Lion King for Sega.

Probably my glasses. Or if my hair is up, the holes in my ears.

Music: Everything, really. Right now it's The Weeknd, The Black Keys, Thrice, Cults, Ludovico Einaudi, Animal Collective, Blakroc, and Kid Cudi. And anything 90's, especially the r&b.

Movies: Mostly comedies and documentaries. The Sound of Music and Scott Pilgrim. Live freaky die freaky. I've been on a Mark and Jay Duplass kick lately.

Books: Currently reading Children of the Mind by Orson Scott Card.

TV: I watch a shit load of shit.

I love carbs.

My dog, music, laughter, toilet paper, sunglasses and chapstick.

Tupac cat

And this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KAQhG59zqZc

When the song California Love comes on in other states do people get as hyphy as they do here?

Why the fuck is it so hot right now?

Putting on my red shoes and dancing the blues.

Probably sleeping cause I work at 5 most Saturday mornings.

Or getting harassing phone calls from my friends 5 year old daughter cause I fell asleep when I should be at her house playing uno with her.

Doing anything that will give me a good story to tell later.

Jameson.

I have Bieber fever.

You have a loud, unique laugh or you have a dog that can put up playing with my crazy dog. You can teach me how to shoot a hand gun. I don't know. You fucking feel like it.

If you enjoy watching The Office as much as I do. Which is a whole fucking lot.

I have a tendency to be loud and innapropiate at the wrong times. I need someone that can put me in my place and tell me to shut the fuck up when it's necessary.

If you still somehow haven't seen two girls one cup. I would love to be the person who shows it to you.

If you're okay with my Irish stoicism and that you will likely not see much emotion from me.

And you don't try as hard to be cool as every other fucking prick on this site.