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32 Philadelphia, PA Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 22–40
  • Near me
  • For long-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Sep 25
5′ 3″ (1.60m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Leo, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and has cats

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm Aaron, a teeny tiny 32 year old father of two cats.
I like bikes, baseball, blunts, beer and celebrities named Bruce (seriously, think about it...Springsteen, Willis, Lee, Dickinson, Campbell and the shark from Finding Nemo are all fucking awesome. Bruce Bochy sucks though. Fuck the San Francisco Giants and Tim Lincecum's stupid face).
I also own a plethora of flannel shirts and am horrifically bad at remembering to get haircuts on the reg, so I'm usually a sloppy mess.

follow me on instagram: aarongoddamncrank
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Mostly I work and occasionally I try to save my money for possible major purchases....but somehow at 32 I'm still kinda frivolous with my spending habits....its a process.

After work and my weekends usually consists of relaxing, working out, hangouts, food/drink and blowing off steam. I also just recently decided I like the outdoors and want to start camping on the reg....I bought a hatchet and a sleeping bag, so lets do that shit.

I kind of hate my job. I spend 40 hours a week administering latte enemas to entitled assholes who think their coffee order makes them special....I also get to tell people to clean bathrooms and to respect my authoritah and do my bidding. I've been with the same company for a decade now, the pay is decent, the stock options, 401k and benefits are above I kinda have this weird sense of loyalty to the company for being pretty good to me, despite my gripes with it.

However, when I'm not working I'm primarily a pretty happy fella, even though the above made me sound like some sort of miserable jerk.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Eating: I have an insatiable appetite, and am constantly munching on something. Extra points if its a hot dog or a burrito.

Spouting off baseball stats: not sabermetrics though, I don't understand WAR or VORP or BABIP or any of that nonsense. Just give me traditional stats please. Miguel Cabrera's triple crown is far cooler to me than how the Angels would perform if some hypothetical AAA player took Mike Trout's place.

Making overpriced subpar espresso beverages: Even though I'm actually just pushing a button and pulling a lever....oh well.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I supposedly bear a striking resemblance to a young Paul Simon, or Charlie Day. I don't see either one, but especially as Its Always Sunny has gotten more popular, I get the Charlie comparison more and more.

I get complimented on my eyes and/or smile occasionally, but I don't see it.

I'm hella short.

I have alot of bad tattoos, so theres that too.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: I read alot of erotic Star Wars fan fiction. That's not true, but I really don't read as much as I'd like. Feel free to suggest a good book.

Movies: The Dark Knight Trilogy, Die Hard series, The Departed, The Royal Tenenbaums

Shows: The Wire and The Golden Girls are tops for me. I feel like Avon Barksdale and Sophia Petrillo would be homies. I also love Breaking Bad, Destination Truth and South Park

Music: Marvin Gaye, Badfinger, Rot In Hell, Ghost, NWA, The Murder City Devils, Seven Sisters of Sleep, Chuck Ragan, The Gaslight Anthem, Deafheaven, Snoop, Nas, Shuggie Otis
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Baseball
2. Arnold Palmers (the combination of black tea and lemonade, not the golfer)
3. Lorenzo's Pizza
4. Federal Donuts
5. My cats
6. Netflix
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Judgement Day.....when Skynet becomes self aware and launches its offensive against humanity. I know its real. I know it happens. On August 29, 1997 its gonna feel pretty fucking real to you too. Anyone not wearing two million sunblock is gonna have a real bad day, get it?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Probably either at work, on a bike ride, wrestling with my cats, watching netflix, rolling a blunt or eating a burrito. I'm super exciting, obvs. I don't really do the whole bar scene that often...I'm not opposed to it by any means, but I'm just not much of a drinker. I prefer a beer (maybe two) on my couch while I watch a movie or maybe in my backyard with friends.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Wouldn't be answering this make it no longer private? Get yo shit together OKC.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're shorter than me, or not opposed to hanging with a bite sized fella.
You want to eat hot dogs and watch Die Hard.
You wanna get standing room tickets and drink beer at ballgames this summer.
You want to go on a bike ride.
You want to go to the zoo with Roy Halladay.
You want to take a ferry to Camden to look at that huge alligator at the aquarium.
You know the reference in my "I spend alot of time thinking about" section.

And most importantly: PLEASE no trainwrecks, scummy girls or liars. I've had a tendency to pick some real winners over the years, and I'm really not looking to keep going down that road.