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ACSlaterstein

34 M Los Angeles, CA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 3:16pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 3″ (1.91m)
Body Type
Used up
Diet
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Judaism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Virgo, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Retired
Income
More than $1,000,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Speaks
English (Poorly), Bengali (Fluently), Ilongo (Okay), Mongolian (Poorly), Sanskrit (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Unlike those of you who never imagined being on an online dating site, I've dreamed of this moment since I was a young boy. That makes me a visionary because the internet wasn't really around back then. I could tell you that I like to "work hard and play hard", but to be quite honest, I work best flaccid. Also, I stopped "playing" in sixth grade. I'm into originality, people who get it, good music, tv, and entertainment, and some good old fashioned tom foolery. I'm also a sucker for the Whole Foods' salad bar. If any of that sounds appealing to you, hit me up, but don't be too aggressive. I'm not afraid to slap an online restraining order on you.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a fortune cookie writer. It's a tough job, but someone has to do it.
I’m really good at
Filling out online questionnaires. I mean, are you reading this? It's f'in fantastic.
The first things people usually notice about me
That I'm tall, have all my teeth, and have one helluva head of hair.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I love to read but am really bad with favorites.
Movies: Karate Kid, Goonies, Old School, Three Amigos, Cable Guy, Stepbrothers, Shawshank, Anchorman
TV: Curb, Eastbound and Down, random Food Network shows, ESPN
The six things I could never do without
1.facial hair
2.underwear
3.my Bugle Boys
4.beard trimmer (I don't want to look like Tom Hanks in Cast Away)
5.Chuck Norris
6.sense of humor
I spend a lot of time thinking about
When it became so in vogue for women to post pictures of themselves wearing fake mustaches, shootings guns, and jumping in the air on OKCupid (not all at the same time, but if someone did all of that at once, they'd be pretty badass). Update: a new trend in women's profile pics is yoga poses in public places. Congrats, ladies! That warrior pose at the beach is a winner.
Whether people on here who say "Don't message me if...", and "I'm not looking for..." order at restaurants by saying, "I won't have the chicken. I won't have salad. I won't have soup."
On a typical Friday night I am
Practicing the lambada
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
A.I drank gasoline when I was four.
2.I've never seen Top Gun. I'm saving it for marriage.
D.I'm illiterate.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 25–34
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You're looking for a man who was voted to People Magazine's top 100 internet bachelors in 2004.