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21 M Seattle, WA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 9:59am
5′ 11″ (1.81m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Cancer, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from high school
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Recently added resident to the wonderful city of Seattle. So far my only complaint is you are all terrible drivers.

My modesty is probably my best quality. I never hang out with people my own age. I enjoy the company of animals. Purple is my favorite color and I hate small talk. I made a joke the first sentence of this paragraph. I won't tell you how I am feeling. My gaming handle is an innuendo that does not make sense. I hate disappointing or being inconvenient so have a hard time with decisions, like what I am getting on a pizza. I use a lot of voice inflection and hand gestures. I combine eloquence with swearing. I am terrible at social networking.
What I’m doing with my life
Making commission convincing people Verizon is better than T-Mobile (which it is) and waiting out the rest of my Army [reservist] contract as a Medic. Selling contracts and stuck in one, basically. I love irony.

I thought about going to school once. Ah-ha.
I’m really good at
Listening, singing spoken-word 'Roxanne' by The Police, observing and not using the Oxford comma in this list.
The first things people usually notice about me
Pale, lean, tall-ish.

I am on the Hall and Oates hotline with speakerphone blasting. Don't believe me? Call +1 (719) 266-2837.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I have (if available) a premium account for every service that provides entertainment. Amazon Prime, Netflix, HBO GO, Pandora/Google Music, Playstation Plus, etc. I am one movie-streaming, music-listening, game-playing, Kindle-reading mother fucker.

Live shows are hands down the best, though!

One of my sisters is vegan, another is extremely picky, and another has almost every food allergy one can have. None of those things applies to me. Let's eat!

I play softball and football, as well.
The six things I could never do without
In no particular order ....
... ethnic foods
... happy hour
... Wi-Fi
... Reddit
... boxer-briefs
... antisocial cats
I spend a lot of time thinking about
If I am a sociopath. No, right?

Why everyone has "taco" in their username. Do you just like tacos, or ... ?

What is Snapchat useful for? "This is me, at work. This is me, not at work."
On a typical Friday night I am
Crying into my whiskey sour, masturbating, and going to bed because I work on Saturday.

Ha-ha, I am totally kidding. I don't cry.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm a grow-er, not a show-er.
I get creeped out by spiders.
I am an avid Android user.
I am not a Seahawks fan.
I enjoyed Mass Effect 3's ending.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–28
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You want to fall in love and never feel it reciprocated because I'll pay more attention to your cat.

You called the aforementioned hotline.

You have troubleshooting questions, or want me to fix your plan.