Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I come highly recommended.
Just take a look at these testimonials from actual users!
"A good girl for you... well, I think she would have to not be too
concerned with social graces."
-- My Boss, 46
"A+++++++ fast payment would recommend"
-- bonghits4jesus87, ebay seller
"Suspect is a white male, approximately 6'1 or 6'2, One-ninety
pounds, may be heading east on McAllister, repeat McAllister, or
possibly Fulton, all units be advised..."
-- Sgt. Cortez, 37
"The feel good hit of the summer, with swirling synths, pounding
bass, and a sick vocal breakdown"
-- Pitchfork Magazine
"How did you get in here? This is for guests only. Sir, I'm going
to have to ask you to leave immediately. No, you can't have that.
Put that down."
-- Ahmir, 25, Hotel security
"You got a face for radio."
-- Bum on Market and 6th
I'm a database engineer/analyst at a small advertising firm. I ride
a motorcycle (Yamaha YZF-R6) I like frisbee, homebrewing beer,
drinking said beer, german board games, and reading widely. I run
and lift a couple times a week to counteract the effects of the
aforementioned beer. I think pulling out your phone in the middle
of conversation is the height of rudeness, and I'm completely
unimpressed by social media. I have really entertaining facial
expressions. If I had a nickel for every time I started a sentence
with "I read about a study where..." I could pay for like 40
seconds of parking. I've backpacked for weeks at a time and crossed
the atlantic a few times. I consistently test INTP, if those
letters mean anything to you. My love language is definitely
I really like dogs, my family raised several guide dog puppies when
I was a kid and I miss that a lot. If I had a living situation
where I could have a dog that fetched frisbees I'm pretty sure I
wouldn't need other humans.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm enjoying the fact that we live in the future, as Louis C.K.
says. This is seriously the best time to be alive ever. I've got
gripes, but it's really difficult to be serious about them when I
have a magic brick in my pocket with literally all the world's
knowledge and especially cat pictures on it.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I used to think that I was pretty good at impressions, until
someone pointed out that they were basically all Sean Connery from
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Like most people my height, I am 6'1".
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I love frisson-causing EDM, Examples: Gareth Emery, Above and
Beyond, Pryda, Tritonal, Andrew Bayer, Arty, Mat Zo, Mark Eteson,
Porter Robinson, Aruna, Seven Lions, etc.
My two favorite artists are Bonobo and Emancipator.
Words that start with E: Ebullient, effervescent, etiolated,
Shows I've enjoyed recently:
Game of Thrones, Firefly, Veronica Mars, Battlestar Galactica,
Breaking Bad, Deadwood, The Wire, Suits, White Collar, Twin Peaks,
Books: Currently reading Brothers Karamazov. Before that I read the
Wind-Up Bird Chronicle by Murakami. It was my first Murakami novel;
I didn't really warm up to it, I felt his characters did not behave
like real people. One of the producers at Pixar said that her
golden rule for writing screenplays is that it's fine to get your
characters into a situation by coincidence, but never ok to have
them solve it by coincidence. I felt like every conflict in that
novel violated that rule.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Never liked this question. I've rewritten it several times and it
never comes out right. If you answer too directly, it's so chumpy
and boring. But if you answer it too glibly, it's twee and
eyerolly. Ignore for a minute that that describes almost everything
on this site, this one's the worst.
I like regular human stuff, like you.
I'll replace it with some other things instead.
Average time it takes from closing the apartment door to removing
pants : 35s
Favorite ironic greeting containing the word "Bro" :
Best burrito filling: Carnitas
Number of popped collars where it goes from douchey to parody: 3.5
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How are we going to handle geometrically increasing productivity in
a somewhat linear demand-based economy in the next couple of years?
The only way I see to prevent a total collapse in the near future
is a universal basic income, but this seems politically untenable
in the current climate.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Wiping up the bowl of Chicken Tikka with the last of that garlic
naan at 1:30
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I worry sometimes that I don't seem to feel things as strongly or
deeply as other people do. Like most of the time when I go to a
concert, I'll think it's just alright, then read later how
hyperbolically someone else loved it and wonder if we went to the
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You know what I'd love? Just message me something fucking random.
Like just the phrase "anal prolapse" or something. The less
explanation, the better - like a two word writing prompt.
Or, if you want a motorcycle ride.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.