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ASimpleSpiderman

25 M Temple Hills, MD

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 5:04pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Black
Height
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body Type
Skinny
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Christianity, and laughing about it
Sign
Scorpio, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Administration
Income
$30,000–$40,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
I think it's time to blow this scene. Get everybody and the stuff together. Ok three, two, one, let's jam.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2rVnRwW0h8

Slightly dorky, very geeky, a little introverted, quiet and mellow yet crazy and fun loving. Add a handful of nerdiness, two scoops of friendliness, one tablespoon of sarcasm, and a sprinkling of occasional self-deprecation and you got me in a nutshell. I have a love for video games, anime, zombies, museums, Fireball Whiskey, paperbacks, military history, movies, board games, and Chipotle burritos.

To sum up, if Kif from Futurama and Ted from How I Met Your Mother somehow had a son, it would probably be me.

A few random facts about me
1. I've met Rosa Parks while she was alive
2. I've been on TV before
3. I've never broken a bone my entire life
4. I've met the director of Cowboy Bebop
5. I have Wale's autograph
6. I've seen President Obama in person twice
7. I've sauntered into Mordor
8. I am a man of eye street
What I’m doing with my life
First off, do you like apples? You'll know why if you read my whole profile.

I received my B.A. in English from UMBC in 2010 and soon after, my M.S. in Human Resources Management from UMUC in 2013.

In between my two degrees, I've worked as a clerk/investigative assistant for the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. I've also worked as an intern for a local government contractor in their HR office since October 2013.

I just started a job as a government contractor based in the HR office of the GAO in DC. Needless to say, I'm very excited because I feel that HR is my right career path. It finally gives me the opportunity to pursue my five year plan but for now, I'm just ready to get it started.
I’m really good at
Using movie quotes in appropriate real life situations, saving the galaxy as the first human spectre, getting on the Metro car that will stop right in front of the escalator, being a good listener, pretending I can dance, being your friendly neighborhood Spiderman, surviving the zombie apocalypse (twice), playing a VERY mean hand in Cards Against Humanity and Snake Oil, working hard for selfless reasons. Probably more but I can't think of them off the top of my head.
The first things people usually notice about me
My friends say I have a natural talent for being funny even when I'm not trying to be. I'm pretty humble and not in a sucking up/kissing ass kinda way. People notice that I almost always have a book with me wherever I go. I'm usually wearing some quirky hat or t-shirt that references something I love. I'm also extremely easy to talk to.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Top 5 Books: Battle Royale, World War Z, Band of Brothers, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, All Quiet on the Western Front

What I'm Currently Reading: Console Wars by Blake Harris

Top 5 Movies : Top Gun, Lord of War, Starship Troopers, Gangs of New York, Blazing Saddles

Newest Movie I've Recently Watched: Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

Top 5 TV Series : How I Met Your Mother, Archer, True Blood, The Walking Dead, Friday Night Lights (probably my favorite TV show of all time)

What TV Show I'm Currently Watching: The Strain

Top 5 Anime : Gundam 0080, Full Metal Panic!, Cowboy Bebop, Black Lagoon, Tengen Toppa Gurren-Lagann

What Anime I'm Currently Watching: Aldnoah Zero

Top 5 Video Games : Mass Effect, Fire Emblem Super Robot Wars, Smash Bros., Mario Kart

What Game I'm Playing: Catherine

Top 5 Musicians/Bands : The Killers, Lindsey Stirling, Zomboy, Knife Party, Anamanaguchi

What Album I Currently Have on Repeat: Transistor OST
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9O2Rjn1azc
The six things I could never do without
-My GPS (I have a terrible sense of direction)
-Exploration and curiosity
-The internet
-Humility
-A good paperback (they fit in my pocket better than a hardcover can)
-Family (blood or not)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How funny would the movie "Speed" be if they were on a short bus the entire time?
What place can I travel to that won't break my bank?
Why people still don't realize that on DC Metro escalators (when they actually work), you STAND ON THE RIGHT and walk on the left...
Really bad puns.
Will we eventually see giant robots stomping around?
Rhetorical questions. Man who needs em?
Why does OKC describe me as more organized than most but more sloppy than most as well?
On a typical Friday night I am
Typical is boring. Here's my ideal night.

Over a friend's house. We all have a gathering for drinks, hookah, shooting the shit, video games, fire pit, card games, and probably drunken singing/dancing depending on how much we've had to consume.

Honorable mention to staying in to Netflix or catch up on some new movie or game that came out.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Sometimes when I drive and Danger Zone pops on my MP3 playlist (yes I have the Top Gun soundtrack on my phone, DON'T JUDGE ME), I find myself unconsciously pretending my gear shifter is a throttle like on a jet and that I'm Tom Cruise.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 24–30
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
-You have a love of museums and bookstores
-You're Metro/WMATA accessible (AKA, you're within driving distance in and around the DC, MD, NoVA area)
-You have a plan for the zombie apocalypse
-You ever want to play on Steam sometime
http://steamcommunity.com/id/thealmightyfoofy

And just to conclude: how bout them apples?