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55 Bristol, UK Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 54–56
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 4:06am
Pacific Islander
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Full figured
Mostly other
Very often
Atheism, and laughing about it
Dropped out of high school
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
English (Okay), French (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Perhaps the most important thing you need to know about me is that unless a lot of things go terribly wrong, I will be moving to France (almost certainly Brittany) in about 5 years' time ... so this will probably continue to be more of a blog than a dating profile. - and once there' there are even fewer locals subscribed to this site.

Donc si tu cherche une relation de longue durée, il faut que tu parles français au moins un peu déjà et aura envie de l'améliorer (Est-ce qu'on se tutoie automatiquement sur un site de rencontre ? )

Not scared off ?

Facts are easy (and there are masses of those in this epic profile), , but what sort of prospect am I emotionally ?

I have loved and been loved in return ... (there's a song in there somewhere)
I was guilty in the past of leaping before looking ... and then taking so long to recover from the inevitable consequences that I forgot what I'd learned and made the same mistake again - but hopefully two points constitute a learning curve ... I wonder how many people find lifelong partners without hearts being broken ?

On a daily basis I do my best to work around my basic human failings - the greatest of which in my case is probably procrastination.
I usually still manage to assume people are decent and motivated to do the right thing and am only occasionally deeply disappointed.
I could definitely try harder to pro-actively do things for others.... I hope to remedy that in the near future ...

I would like to beat myself up rather less over my mistakes.
I could also do with rather more frivolity in my life - I haven't felt like dancing for far too long - but some things need to be shared...

You may well find some of the following a bit blunt, but relationship failure is horrible, so why not deal with the easily-avoided pitfalls straight away. ?

----------------------------- 1 ---------------------------

"Green" / Left of centre / atheist / socially libertarian etc. ?
This is, after all, the 21st century.

----------------------------- 2 ------------------------------

Do you enjoy the outdoors; sleeping under canvas; messing about in or on the sea; gardening; self-sufficiency, ?

I'm not talking about being holed-up in the woods, but we aren't going to get on if you're into fast cars, skiing holidays and gold plated bath taps.

----------------------------- 3 ------------------------------

Music has always been an essential accompaniment to my life and I would want to share this with a partner - so there would need to be a healthy overlap in our tastes .(extensive details below)

----------------------------- 4 ------------------------------

Do you live within reasonable mutual cycling distance (15 miles) of east Bristol ?

In terms of establishing real-life friendships, being realistic, I mean Bristol, plus anywhere near to the railway path as far as Bath ...
I can drive, but prefer not to own a car, and don't even like taking the bus when I can cycle or walk.
"...but I'm open to persuasion... " (one of my favourite songs :) )

----------------------------- 5 ------------------------------

Parles-tu français - au moins un peu ?

I'm hoping to retire in five years' time, sell my hovel in the UK and move to within walking distance of the French Atlantic coast - to live on a modest pension I appear to have acquired more by luck than planning.

I'm currently looking at Finistere - I have crashing waves and quiet beaches at the top of my shopping list, but also supermarkets and doctors and transport links.
I also need to have a big enough garden to grow my own fruit and veggies ("oh no, not asparagus again !" ). - the best possible way to keep fit and have a healthy diet while subsidising a pension !

I want to swim, dive, kayak, surf, and probably sail - as well as quite likely cycle across France at a relaxed pace , with lots of camping and simply picnicking on the beach. I've taken far too few holidays in my life so far.

I've trimmed this project down from full-on self-sufficient living out in the sticks to something rather more conventional - though I'm open to persuasion if I have a helpmate.

A key point that has dawned on me is that though I'm fitter and healthier than most, and living within walking distance of a supermarket is currently harming my health, this is after all "retirement" so I don't want to be too isolated and heavily dependant on transport .- especially of the motorised variety.
Clearly human company is going to be a vitally important factor so I want to make sure I'm not shipwrecked in a sea of holiday homes.

I naturally would like to share this with a kindred spirit - but I also need to make the most of the next five years...


I fell in love with France when I twice visited for a month in my teens, I've always had French colleagues, and intermittently listened to French radio (now exclusively ) - which gives ours a serious run for its money.

Initially, having to drag my neglected French towards eventual fluency seemed too much like hard work, but it quickly became part of the attraction - along with being forced to give the human race another go - through needing to get to know people from a different culture - though not all that different - and even now as I edge towards being a 60-plus retiree, albeit the very idea seems bonkers, I find myself more understanding of other people's priorities.

I hope to make myself useful in the local community as a replacement for what I do at work - and I certainly wouldn't turn down occasional paid work as a way of integrating as well as eeking out my modest pension.

It will be a challenge moving from a city and a job where I mix with very diverse people, to the very different rhythm of small town / village life. But I'm very much in need of an injection of the French style of human interaction.
And I'm also finding myself drawn to Breton culture.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Improving my French.

Clearing out my hovel so I can do it up a bit and sell it in 5 years' time and escape to France.

Trying to shift the results of over-indulgence in relatively inexpensive carbohydrates.

---------------- gardening ------------------

In 2014, my brugmansias survived the unusually mild winter entirely unscathed in my unheated greenhouse, so I ended up doing a lot less cycling and much more gardening - so less of the sprinting and hauling my vast bulk over the surrounding hills, and more lifting, carrying and occasional climbing as I endeavoured to use every cubic inch of my hundredth of an acre.

Ironically my gardening year started with me doing something to my piriformis muscle, which then hooked up with an inconveniently arranged sciatic nerve and being unable to walk unaided for 6 weeks.
I've been musing that this example of very poor "design" is my own personal and painful proof of evolution.

Luckily I could still cycle five miles, but the walk to and from the bike shed was almost comically painful - thereafter, the building where I have a moderately active job is amenable to my pushing a trolley everywhere. The local supermarket was more of a challenge because I had to walk to and from the trolley park.

So having something to enjoy from my garden bench was very welcome.

Initially I was going to grow just a few of my favourite plants, plus a lot of salad in the greenhouse, but I had to shelve the salad idea because the ornamentals have shaded the greenhouse too much !

My garden has ended up as something of a shrine to the sub-tropical, often spectacularly fragrant and delightfully toxic solanaceae family.

----------------------- cycling ---------------------

I get a shiver down my spine at how close I came to not cycling - or in effect taking any regular exercise at all.

In spite of being a whole-food vegan from 21, I was 27 when I was actually forced onto non-motorised two wheels, 36 before I got super fit due to the rave scene, and 49 before I stopped putting the bike away for the weekend when I got home from work on Friday !
My scrawny adolescent nerd self would be amazed at how I now sometimes spend my free time .

I'm no Lycra warrior, and mostly only a mid-distance, mid-speed plodder, but I try to cycle 365 days a year - sometimes in the recent past averaging 100 miles a week during the better half of the year - commuting, shopping, group rides with the Bristol CTC, two day camping trips and sometimes just for the exercise and chasing the sunshine. I'm hoping to build up to multi-week touring.
I'm striving to find real enjoyment in climbing hills, and most days will sprint for a mile or two - testing the pain barrier, but I wouldn't be seen dead in a gym and I hate "sport" of all kinds (I'll watch bits of the TDF, but largely for the scenery - the riding itself is insane and the rest of the year I wonder why I watched it - I hate the way cyclists ride too fast and close to others on shared paths) and have never in 25 years of cycling set out without music to listen to, and until recently wouldn't go for a ride unless there was a specific destination and a "purpose" for going.

In retirement I hope to do a lot of sea swimming and almost certainly kayaking and maybe even some lazy surfing.

--------- non-human-powered transport -------

At 24, after 7 years of motorcycling, having been horrified by a trial driving lesson a few years earlier, I bought a Reliant 3 wheeler and taught myself to drive one evening in 1984, but long distance driving sends me to sleep and I use motorised transport - even as a passenger - only when there's no other option. I've owned or part-owned 6 motorcycles, 5 cars and 5 bicycles.

The car adverts on TV baffle me.

The older I get, the more cars look like mobility scooters - but usually with non-disabled people driving them.
(There is a sad convergence - though it's mostly psychological)
The craziest feature of this era is children being driven to school in armoured cars, and recreational shopping that makes Sunday traffic on suburban roads look like the trunk roads did during the rush hour when I was a kid.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Inventing stuff.

Gardening :-

My preference is for for form and fragrance and a restrained palette of colours.
Oh and I'm a bit of an amateur botanist / plantophile.
I can't wait till I have a bigger garden in retirement and the time to grow my own veggies.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm built like a brick outhouse - though hopefully I move with a little more grace - due to my daily hour (minimum) of cycling to music and having done a lot of dancing of the improvised variety.
My wardrobe is as minimalist as I can manage - and I don't own a suit or a tie. I aim to be able to dress in the dark !
There is only one setting on my washing machine.
I fully subscribe to the modern design principle that form should follow function and I hope to always be ready to jump on my bike at a moment's notice.

My bathroom has only Body Shop shower gel, fragrance-free deodorant and fennel toothpaste and is not a room in which I spend much time - even my weekly bath isn't a major performance. (I appear to be lucky with my genes - try googling "ABCC11 " )
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I learned to read incredibly easily, but it's been downhill since then. I haven't actually read a book in years, and if I allowed you to visit my hovel, you would struggle to find a single book.
I often find the themes in literature and drama distressing.

That said, I read "Zen and The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance several times, most of the William Gibson "Cyberpunk" novels, and I once read Dickens's Hard Times" during a very brief dalliance in the Social Sciences - as well as "1984" and "Brave New World" ..

I even managed to fail my English O level the first time (I got an A in French), and ungraded in English Lit (I enjoyed "To Kill a Mockingbird", but "Romeo and Juliet"- yuck ! -).

I once bought a copy of "Ulysses" in the doomed hope that I could learn to love literature as much as music, but found it just as suffocating and depressing as if it had been conventional in form.

Since I'm learning French, I bought a copy of "Le Nez Qui Voque" a few years back after hearing a very abridged and atmospheric reading on "France Culture", but I haven't got very far - I certainly won't be reading any Camus or Sartre.

I occasionally enjoy radio drama and book readings.


I dislike "movies" - apart from the likes of classics like "Inherit The Wind", "12 Angry Men", "To Kill a Mockingbird". or "Goodbye Mr. Chips" and inevitably as a Francophile I like Tati and Pagnol (with someone to hold my hand I might be able to cope with watching "Jean de Florette" a second time) I've never seen "Star Wars" or "Indiana Jones" and have no plans to.


In terms of non-factual TV, I used to like detective series - "Morse", "Law and Order", "CSI", etc, - though the subject matter is ultimately too disturbing for me.
In spite of being squeamish, I watched every "House" episode more than once, and embarrassingly fall back on Star Trek TNG & Voyager and latterly "Big Bang Theory" for comfort fodder.
I'm on the cusp of seeing if I can live without endless repeats of "Time Team" and "Air Crash Investigation" and thereby slim down my cable package. (The programmes classed as "factual" on the Discovery channels would be laughable if it wasn't such a scary reflection on the beliefs of the average American)
French TV doesn't so far seem worth the expense ... their speech radio on the other hand sometimes makes even Radio 4 seem a bit naff.

My TV finally packed up at the end of 2014 and I haven't missed it - so I will be cancelling my cable package.


"Shows" LOL
I was actually once dragged out to see "Coco Cabana" and didn't actually hate it.
I saw a fair few Shakespeare, Ibsen and Chekhov plays at the Old Vic one year so at least am familiar with the experience of theatre.
I find Shakespeare too sexist, racist, crude and violent - spectacular though the word-play may be. (perhaps there are also too many words - I'm not keen on Mozart either)

----------------------------- music ------------------------------------

"One good thing about music, when it hits you feel no pain"
Actually in the particular case above, I need to be in a very comfortable place to hold back the tears.

For me it's like being on a drip. It helps keep me sane, it helps me zone-out the traffic noise drifting over from the main roads as I cycle to work and back - as well as being worth a few extra MPH.
If I didn't share an office I would have it playing 24 hours a day.

I was raised on the likes of Vaughan Williams and Ravel parents were seriously into singing (madrigals, lieder) and made me join a church choir (I soon did a runner) ... I even "played" the clarinet as a child, and briefly attempted to play "jazz" later, but I have absolutely no talent for making music ...but I can generally make some sort of vocalisation in tune.
I don't mind a bit of Bach - or perhaps EARLY Mozart, but full-on classical and worse still "romantic" music with its German drinking songs leaves me cold.

In the 70s, encountering Motown, Pink Floyd, punk (a fairly brief dalliance in my late teens) and especially dub reggae changed my tastes for ever.

Hearing "King Tubby Meets Rockers Uptown" on John Peel in 1977 was pivotal. :-

My favourite vocal album is Joni Mitchell's "The Hissing of Summer Lawns" which I have been known to sing along with in its entirety. (Ironic since its narrative is not something I would relate to in literature or film)

These days it's mostly "ambient electronica" - which probably means so much more to me because I spent many Saturday nights dancing myself skinny at local raves in the late 90s.

I feel incredibly spoiled these days.
Those of us who enjoyed minimal / avant-garde/electronic music in the 70s and 80s used to have to really scrape around for it - we had Tangerine Dream, Steve Reich, even resorting to the instrumental bits of Genesis albums ....

"Deep Mix Moscow" radio is my daily cycling soundtrack :-

The nearest to a full-on "rave experience" these days is when I'm sprinting home slightly uphill on the railway path with Orbital or deep House on the cans.

Doing it to a samba beat is a particular pleasure :-

Aphex Twin :-
Orbital :-
LTJ Bukem :-
Basic Channel :-

Electronica; dub; jazz; reggae; Joni Mitchell; worldbeat; dance; Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan; Orbital; Basic Channel; Augustus Pablo; AphexTwin; KingTubby; Culture; Miles Davis; Hendrix; ambient; Basic Channel; Goa Trance; techno; Ulrich Schnauss; stax; motown; soul; LTJ Bukem; Larry Heard; Andy Sheppard; Boards of Canada; TheOrb; garage; Pink Floyd; MC Solaar; Cocteau Twins; Soul II Soul; Stanley Clarke; John Martyn; Disco; house; Drum&Bass; detroit; Jeff Mills; Keith Jarrett; Weather Report; Airto Moreira; Linton Kwesi-Johnson; stax; motown; cheb mami; steve hillage; MC Conrad


(select, right-click, choose "open link")

I spent my late 30s dancing by myself in Bristol (at the back of the room wearing earplugs). I came to the "rave" scene very late. My ears were at the time attuned largely to modern jazz and the early UK rave music had sounded like massed Stylophones... and then there was all that driving around the M25 - all totally alien to me. Then I heard the Aphex Twin on late one night Radio 3 , and also noticed the legal "repetitive beats" events that were happening within walking distance.

I never met my dance partner in this "vibrant" city of 400,000.

By the time I turned 40, the scene had soured and I'd had enough of paying £10 or more to spend a few hours in a smoke-filled room with a load of boozed-up youngsters.

So I returned to my gardening and since then have had to dance at home - or in my head.
Mostly I "dance" on my bike at 15MPH. (I see a lot of my cycling as some sort of dancing or meditation.)

I tried several different Salsa classes, but found it cheesy and contrived out of the context of Cuba (maybe I was also too unhappy) ... I prefer slightly moody samba influences in my jazz and dance music.

I managed half a lesson of Lindy (the instructor was built like Wayne Sleep, but just a little more elastic) and CeRoc (I did a runner from both after half an hour - after the latter I was reeking of cheap perfume - the venue with its keg beer should have given me a clue )

I repeatedly wonder about Zumba, but it seems a bit too much like line dancing, and then there's "urban street dance", but to be honest, I can't see myself fitting in...

I reckon I just need to find the right partner - and give real meaning to the dance.

-------------------------- DIET ----------------

I was a dietary vegan throughout my 20s and 30s, (never seen "Star Wars", never eaten in a fast food place) but thanks to Ray Mears and Hugh Fearlessly Eatsitall, and a desire to be more sociable, in my early 40s I started dabbling in fish (At least /attempting/ to catch one first was a prerequisite I set myself), and latterly French cheese and free range eggs (I've always had far more of a moral problem with dairy and eggs) , but my diet is still nearly always vegan and I could happily eat tofu and salad sprouts all day ...It's quite possible that I will revert (I dream of looking more like an Okinawan and less like a Tongan !) I like sushi and do nearly all my cooking in a wok, but I pick and mix.

Update - a summer binge on oily fish shows that I appear to be prone to gout - another evolutionary "joke" ... so I am vegan again until further notice.

I'm not a "social" drinker .. sadly it's almost always solitary - most nights - therefore "often" - but in moderation - 1 glass a night - and only ever as an accompaniment to food ... I like half decent southern French red wine - Cotes du Rhône, Saint-Émilion etc - though it brings the associated danger of cheese.
(not good for the waistline and I always had more moral issues with dairy than fish)
A lot of my excess calories actually come from those not-so-innocent smoothies...

I lack any great enthusiasm for cooking, but I know what to do with vegetables.
I mostly cook in a wok. I like "oriental" / Mediterranean - but in the main quite simple / bland food - I splosh tahini about liberally.
I make my own heavily seeded wholemeal bread and spread crunchy PNB and Vitam-R yeast extract on it.
I'm very particular about my tea and coffee too - Oolong blend during the week at work, Guatemala single estate on weekends (Aeropress inverted method) I'll settle for an Earl Grey teabag when out on a Sunday bike ride.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Difficult to put these first three in order :-

1. Music - I used to carry FOUR MP3 players - two of them were phones - though I never actually make or accept any calls.
2. Bicycle
3. The Internet

4. I would like to say "The Atlantic ocean", but I rarely get to see it - let alone mess around in/on it - hopefully to be corrected in "retirement".
I'm taking daily access to at least a token amount of nature as a given. (as well as oxygen, water, food etc)

5. A loaf of (home made wholemeal) bread, a jug of wine (French red)
6. And thou - currently missing and who would hopefully move a lot nearer number 1....
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Can man live on spuds, sprouts, tahini and cranberry sauce alone ?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Discussing anarchy and kittens on Urban75
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Anything I haven't already confessed will have to wait.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You've read any of the above and still think we might have words to meaningfully share.