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AffableHermit

44 Bellevue, WA Man

Man

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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 25–55
  • Near me
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Jul 27
Orientation
Straight, Demisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
A little extra
Smokes
No
Drinks
Often
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Other, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Aries, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Dropped out of university
Job
Law
Status
Open relationship
Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Offspring
Has a kid, but doesn’t want more
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm introverted, but not in a social anxiety sort of way; I get along well with pretty much everyone. I just really like having down time. I enjoy having people over, or going out to spend time with my friends, but I equally enjoy having my solitude. My MBTI type is INTJ, just in case you're interested in such things. Introversion probably plays into (or is the cause of) my computer geekery, though I do unplug as often as I can to get out and practice photography, which is my main creative outlet / hobby. I think that introversion probably also plays into my sense of humor: I have a dry (though not necessarily quick) wit. It doesn't hurt that I was also exposed every summer to a steady diet of Britcoms by my UK born grandmother.

I'm Canadian and lived in the Atlanta area for a long time. I acclimated to the heat down there as much as I probably could, but I still found summers to be pretty brutal. On top of that I've lost a lot of my resistance to cold, at least from my perspective. I moved to the Seattle area at the start of 2013, so perhaps easy access to snow in the winter will help me recover that.

In relationship matters I'm polyamorous, with an emphasis on the "amorous". I don't do casual sex or hookups, I require there to be an emotional connection before starting anything physical, and usually feel more comfortable if my partners roll the same way. In a general sense I'm looking for new friends or activity partners and, while I'm not actively seeking anything more than that, if something good develops beyond those two things I think that's cool.

The definition of Polyamory that I adhere to is the original one given by the woman who coined the term, Morning Glory Zell, who said “The two essential ingredients of the concept of ‘polyamory’ are ‘more than one’ and ‘loving.’ That is, it is expected that the people in such relationships have a loving emotional bond, are involved in each other’s lives multi-dimensionally, and care for each other. This term is not intended to apply to merely casual recreational sex, anonymous orgies, one-night stands, pick-ups, prostitution, ‘cheating,’ serial monogamy, or the popular definition of swinging as ‘mate-swapping- parties.” To which I would also add a requirement of informed consent: real polyamory demands that you be open, honest and forthcoming about your involvement with and to all your partners.

Unlike a lot of folks I've met who work from that definition, I don't look down on other forms of non-monogamy, and will support people living those lives, so long as they are practicing consensual, ethical non-monogamy.

I'm father to a grown son who still lives in Georgia.

I am mellow, confident, and easy to talk to.

You can find my photography at http://www.flickr.com/photos/aflennik.

NSPP
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Professionally, I'm a specialist in the data analytics technologies used in litigation. It's an interesting field with a very unique set of frustrations and challenges. Outside of work I'm a gamer (pencil and paper RPGs, computer and some console) and photographer. My photography mostly concentrates on landscapes and nature and I will quite happily hare off on a whim to some place new on a weekend just to take pictures. I'm interested in doing more architectural photography and portraiture since I haven't had much practice with them yet.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Fixing your computer. I'm an exceptionally good listener. I think I'm a pretty good photographer (it certainly makes me very happy), but I'm getting better at that all the time.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Facial hair. I sport a circle beard, but I've also worn a full beard and rocked a moustache / soul patch combo. I've been told my eyes are one of my best features.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Let's focus on authors - Arthur Clark, Brian Daley, C. S. Friedman, H. P. Lovecraft, J. R. R. Tolkien, Jenny Lawson (The Bloggess), Larry Niven, Mick Farren, Neal Stephenson, Neil Gaiman, Robert Heinlein, Stephen King, Terry Pratchett

Movies: The Adventures of Baron Munchausen, all of the Alien movies (Except AvP. People keep talking like those got made, but they don't exist.), Blade Runner, Brotherhood of the Wolf, The City of Lost Children, Delicatessen, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, The Fifth Element, Kill Bill, Pulp Fiction, Serenity, Sin City, "Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter... and Spring", Star Wars IV-VI, Tron, V for Vendetta

Music: David Arkenstone, AC/DC, Johnny Cash, Chopin's Raindrop Prelude, The Decemberists, Dire Straits, Iron Maiden, Jethro Tull, Oakenfold, Pink Floyd, Queen, Tiesto, Tool

Foods: My cooking stems from a desire to keep it simple and fresh. I avoid pre-packaged food to a great degree. When eating out, however, my favorite cuisines are Mediterranean, Mexican, Japanese (Sushi) & Ethiopian. I'm currently doing some weight loss via the Atkins diet, so most carbs are off the menu now. I miss you, ice cream.

Shows: Babylon 5, Battlestar Galactica, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Castle, Doctor Who, Firefly, Fringe, Sherlock, Torchwood. I don't really watch a lot of TV (as the number of off the air shows on that list probably attests to) and I don't have cable. Shows that land in the Nerdosphere are my obvious favorites and if they're on Netflix or Amazon Prime Instant I'll probably get around to them eventually.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.

Alone time, books, trees, computers, autumn leaves, cats.

I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Shouldn't I be exercising more? Where can I go next to take photographs?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Friday is dependent on the week I've had and thus how much energy I have. Editing photos, reading, playing a video game, watching a movie, or going to a party have been on the menu, but so has going out to see a Monty Python inspired burlesque performance.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm not as vanilla as I appear.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you feel like it.