1. A day without laughter is a day wasted.
2. I don't need a friend or lover who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better.
3. I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.
4. Love is when you meet someone who tells you something new about yourself.
5. If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude.
6. In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on.
7. Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.
8. Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.
9. It's useless to hold a person to anything he says while he's in love, drunk, or running for office.
10. Never go to bed angry, stay up and fight.