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33 Tucson, AZ Man


I’m looking for

  • Women who like men
  • Ages 21–40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 8:28am
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Virgo, but it doesn’t matter
Working on university
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Has dogs and has cats
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Look up! I'm not single! Still with me? Oh, splendid!

So yes, I'm married to a super awesome young lady. We're both very aware of each other's extracurricular activities and we tend to high five afterwards.

I am child-free (and medically guaranteed to stay that way!) and I tend to make a lot of offensive jokes. I have 3 dogs and 3 cats. I have a pool with a diving board but let's keep that to ourselves and not tell my homeowner's insurance company about that, all right? I feel like I can trust you with this.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I work as a claims adjuster for an insurance company. I'm back in school due to getting 2/3 of the way through a journalism degree when I was first in college (Back when the Earth's crust was still cooling) WITH A FOCUS IN PRINT JOURNALISM. I might as well have majored in rotary phone repair.

Long story short, dropped out, none of my credits transferred to schools here in Arizona, and I'm starting over! Hooray, now I get to take classes like BIO 100! Did you guys know that DNA stands for "Deoxyribonucleic Acid"? Well now you do!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
- Going down on women. Sorry, but it's technically a thing I'm good at. Where else was I supposed to put this?
- Petting dogs that don't really want to be pet right now, thanks.
- Arguing
- Listening to whatever my current favorite song is on repeat for a really long time without getting bored of it.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm fairly tall but otherwise pretty nondescript. Someone once told me I should be an "eye model" but it was someone in the drive though at a Mcdonald's so I'm not sure they were someone I really wanted life advice from.

I am blunt to the point of outright rudeness sometimes. I always want the non sugar coated brutal truth, and I tend to give people the same. If that's not what you'd prefer, I'm not a sociopath, so just say so and I'll be sure to tact it up a bit!

I am a fan of the "tell 10 jokes in a few minutes and at least one of them will likely land" school of conversation.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books - Game of Thrones, what I call "Pop Non Fiction" like The Perfect Storm, the Accidental Millionaires, and Fast Food Nation. I've read pretty much everything by Stephen King (even the Gunslinger books, TEAM JAKE 4 LYFE) and I really like reading dry, scholarly works on Naval warfare (really!)

Movies - I'll just throw a list here, I'm not even going to try to defend it. Anchorman, Ted, Starship Troopers, Transformers, Battleship (It was good! REALLY!), This Is The End.... Actually, you know what, it's easier to just say "Every movie with at least two member of the Frat Pack in it" and "Action movies that stimulate the little lizard part of my brain that enjoys watching things explode"

Shows - Parks and Rec, Archer, The Walking Dead, Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, Sleepy Hollow, New Girl, All the Fox animated shows, How I Met Your Mother, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. I like single camera comedies over the broad multi camera ones (NERD ALERT)

Music - Top 40 music. That's it. Well, and Japanese pop music. And music by Immediate Music. You know the cool pulse-pounding instrumental music that you hear in the trailers to some movies and they all seem to sound really similar and you hear the same ones in a bunch of them? That's Immediate Music!

Food - Peanut Butter. Burgers. Good Steak. Nerds Rope. Choco-Chip cookies by Peggy Lawton (Only available in a 50 square mile radius from their factory in Walpole, Massachusetts, so I'm at the mercy of friends who come visit to bring me a case or two when they arrive). Veggies and stuff make their way in there as I start losing teeth and hair to scurvy.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
- Peanut Butter
- A TV over 70 inches
- Lady orgasms
- A friendly dog or cat that will let me pet it, or preferably pick it up
- Something to put together from scratch (I like building things or putting them together, like computers, home theater setups, etc...)
- The Amino acid Lysine because I'M A DINOSAUR
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I am really interested in gender roles, feminism, and how they play into society. I read Feministing and Shakesville on a daily basis, not because I agree with them (The writers are batshit lunatics who would pile all men into a huge cargo ship and then sink it if they could), and The Good Men Project and A Voice For Men on a somewhat more casual basis (Again, not because I agree with them, they're just as insane as the ladies over at the other two).

Basically I think there's a lot of fucked up aspects to how women are treated in society and I try to keep up with what's happening in that regard. I also think the radical feminist counter-movement that's sprung up is fascinating (although completely wrong-headed and bigoted in their own right)

I Wiki-wander a lot, so I spend hours upon hours reading different articles about literally everything. This has lead me to have a completely superficial knowledge of like...everything. I couldn't give you the slightest bit of in-depth information as to how day-to-day life in Slab City, California works, for example, but I know it exists, and it's basically a tent community of thousands of homeless people and starving artists that live in the middle of nowhere, CA zip code whateverthefuck
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Typical breakdown as follows:

Date Night - 10%
Staying in to watch TV, play video games, or do homework - 60%
House Party where I get FUCKED UP and have to be carried home - 5%
House Party where I just hang out and shoot the breeze with good friends - 10%
Bar Trivia/Meeting a new lady friend to play with/Other - 15%
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I don't know how air conditioning works. Like, I understand it takes air and somehow makes it colder, but as to the actual MECHANISM that causes this, I have no idea. I decided literally like 15 years ago that I want to come up with my own theory before I look it up and see how close I was.

Also, "obsessed" sounds so dark and ominous, but there's really no other way to say it, I'm obsessed with making women orgasm. A lot of "foreplay" type stuff (fingers, tongue, whatever) is my main focus in any sexual encounter.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You want to be friends! - If you just want to chat and maybe hang out, that'd be great! I mostly talk about sex, politics, and touchy societal stuff so be warned! Actually, it's mostly sex I talk about. But it's so interesting!

You want to hook up! - If you're interested in a naked-time encounter that mostly consists of me eating you out a lot, even better! If it goes well, maybe you'd want my fiance to join in next time? Best possible outcome!


If you're easily offended. Actually, fuck it, if you're not almost IMPOSSIBLE to offend. I don't want to get into a "you're too sensitive" vs. "you're not sensitive enough" argument, you stay in your friendly little corner of the internet and I'll stay in mine, sound good?