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AlchemyPhoenix

32 M Mechanicsville, VA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 4:25pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Sagittarius, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Science / Engineering
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Speaks
English (Fluently), Spanish (Okay)

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My self-summary
I'm so optimistic even my blood type is B+!

I think a good indicator of how well I'm eating in any given week is whether I'm running the dishwasher because it's full or because I ran out of silverware.
What I’m doing with my life
My boss just gave me TWO GIFT CERTIFICATES to APPLEBEE'S for being so damn good at my job! (I sell capital analytical equipment to universities and industries, if you're interested. I do just enough applications where I can still barely get away with calling myself a scientist, a title I'm clinging to with all my heart.)

I'm a lover AND a fighter. I do Argentine tango with the ladies and Krav Maga with the boyz (SHOUTOUT TO ALL MY SINGLE FELLAS EATIN BREAKFAST BURRITOS OVER THE KITCHEN SINK HOLLA HOLLA!!!) I also do occasional part time contract work authoring college chemistry textbook questions, so the evil publishers can put out a new edition and prevent you from saving money on a used copy. (Believe it or not, I genuinely feel bad about this. You should buy the old edition and get the homework problems from a classmate.)

Additionally I am part owner in a bar (the silent part), and I keep busy with periodic carpentry, flooring, and landscaping renovations, because I believe a man should work with his hands and know how to do a few certain things.
I’m really good at
picking fights with strangers, writing self-indulgent poetry, seducing older women, saving money, spending money
The first things people usually notice about me
"You look like that guy, from that TV show... What's his name?"
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
The Road, The God Delusion
Fight Club, LA Confidential
David Bowie, Tom Waits, PJ Harvey,
Breaking Bad, Archer, Mad Men
sushi, Italian
The six things I could never do without
There is nothing I could never do without. You adapt. Or at least your ancestors did.

Put me in the woods with a vice grip, a roll of duct tape and a can of WD-40 and I'll figure out a way to survive.
On a typical Friday night I am
cleaning the lint trap in my dryer. I love that shit!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Irony police, I have a piece of floss stuck in my teeth. Does this count?

All I want is for people to accept me for who I pretend to be.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 25–36
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
OK, pay attention, because this is VERY IMPORTANT:
Jonah Hill, Bon Iver, Dale Earnhardt Jr. Fuck, marry, kill. GO!

If you are one of these menacing-smile, violently feminine, stiletto and corset types, you should DEFINITELY message me ;)

You should NOT message me if you are looking for a man who will provide you with cocaine. What you do on your own time is your own business, but I don't use drugs and I'm not going to buy you any or hang out with your friends while they are doing it. If that bores you, then piss off. I don't need you.