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AlhaplusX

27 M Dundee, United Kingdom

My Details

Last Online
Today – 5:29pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body Type
Overweight
Diet
Mostly other
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Gemini, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Working on university
Job
Sales / Marketing
Income
More than $1,000,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Has dogs
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
- I study philosophy and 'Eng Lit' just so I can talk down to the slightly less literate. Being and Time gathers dust on my shelf, Katie Price' latest does on theirs.

- I've bought an expensive suit, but nobody in my family gets married or dies, so I'm hoping to get a date here just as an excuse to wear it pretty much.

- I've met quite a lot of e-women now, and haven't murdered a single one so am a pretty safe kinda guy. Saying that I wouldn't trust most of them near my knife collection like.

- Hyperbole makes me cum buckets.

- I suppose if I was gay, I'd be known in the community as a slightly reluctant bear.

- My friend and I figured out that greengrass from Heartbeat did 9/11, so I think we should go for some drinks and get a woman's perspective.

- My face has been permanently marked above the cheek owing to a date with a girl here. It was a wall, and I was drunk, but the ultimate responsibility is with the buyer of the gin.

I am the Übermensch, looking for my Überfrau.
What I’m doing with my life
Throwing out all of my old clothes, acquiring businessman/pimp looks.

Spreading despair.

Losing my umbrella in my friend's sister's hot-tub.

Counting to 7.

Forgetting to wash my shins.

Fetching tins for old ladies.

Saying 'arriite' to people who recognise me, but I don't remember.
I’m really good at
Fucking things up.

Being blunt.

Rainbow Road.

Being temporarily persuasive.

Saying blatantly outrageous and untrue things and watching people take me seriously. P.P.P.P.P.P.P Poka faccceeeee....

Placing a focus on efficiency in areas of living where it is uncalled for. I talk, shop and shag 'efficiently', but don't work or live efficiently. Perhaps I'm some kind of German from space
The first things people usually notice about me
Tall
Nice eyes
Beer gut
Blazers
Boots
I say inappropriate things
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I no longer pay attention to anything cultural.
The six things I could never do without
The internet
Sex
Dogs
Caffeine
A warm bed
A crisp new shirt
I spend a lot of time thinking about
What the fuck am I doing?

How best to be stylish?

So, where do I go from here?

Does my dog love me or just associate me with warmth, walks and food?
On a typical Friday night I am
Tonight, working. Last week, drunk. Next Friday, still regretting my actions tomorrow.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm a very shy megalomaniac.

My life is completely meaningless.

I have fucked jam, peanut butter, various fruits and a £40 tub of someone else's moisturizer.

I loooooooooooooooooove money, and would abandon all my leftist principles for merely a fiver.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–37
  • Near me
  • For new friends
You should message me if
You find my pictures attractive and don't think real life conversation between us would be awkward.