A passage from "Bitch: In praise of difficult women"


"Well I for one am sick of it. All my life one person or another has been telling me to behave, saying don't let a guy know you're a depressed maniac on the first date, don't just be yourself, don't show your feelings. And the truth is, this is probably good advice, men probably don't like overbearing, hotheaded women who give blow jobs on the first date. In all likelihood the only man who will ever like me just as I am will probably need to believe I'm somebody else at first. I probably do need to learn to behave. But I don't like it. It seems like, all this, all these years of feminism, Mary Wollstonecraft, Charlotte Perkins Gilman, Simone de Beauvoir, Virginia Woolf, Gloria Steinem, Susan Faludi - all that smart writing so we could to behave? Roe v. Wade - so we could learn to behave? Thelma & Louise - so we could learn to behave? The gender gap - so we could learn to behae? Madonna, Sally Ride, Joycelyn Elders, Golda Meir, Anita Hill, Bette Davis, Leni Riefenstahl - all those strong, indefatigable souls so we could learn to behave? What good reall have any of those things done if we still get the feeling that we have to contain our urges and control ourselves in the interest of courtship and love? Did Germain Greer importune us so long ago with the words 'Lady, love your cunt' and did Anka Radikovich regale us with her tales of the sexual picaresque in "The Wild Girls Club" so we could be told never to succumb to our sexual abandon on the first date? After all this agitation, along comes "The Rules" to tell us that we're not even allowed to accept a date for a Saturday night after Wednesday."


And I think she's right, I hate "The Rules." I also hate that women are stuck playing the same mind games that men like to play, just to compete. I'd rather not waste my time, I wont conform to attract someone, anyone who could keep up with me would probably like me just the way I am.

I previously wrote a journal about my poor taste in reality television as a guilty pleasure. So I thought I'd brag about all of the great television I also enjoy. I know some people hate television, but I think they are missing out on some amazing stuff.
I'm a huge fan of PBS. I love most of their normally scheduled series, the Antiques roadshow, Nova, Independant Lense, etc. I dont even know where to begin with their big documentaries. The most recent Ken Burns series about World War II was spectacular. Another favorite that they've aired in the last year was Simon Schaumans The Power of Art.
I'm totally hooked on one of their oldest series called Nature. Its just what you think it is, little one hour episodes about animals, plants, insects, people who work with animals, all of that stuff. There is some amazing cinematography involved in most of the episodes, and besides that I love to learn about animals. In most cases I prefer them to humans, they dont whine or cuss me out, and more importantly, if I dont fuck with them, they dont fuck with me. I've got respect for that. I'm not the type of person to go stomping through the rainforest, so I appreciate that people who do, take their video cameras with them.
Which leads me into my next favorite channel, The Discovery channel. They also do huge projects about nature, Planet Earth and Blue Earth etc, but I'm also a fan of some of their series. I love watching Cash Cab, I think more game shows should be in random places. I think the Discovery channel is also.. less bias when it comes to politics, and religion. Sometimes I think the history channel is trying to persuade me. And what's up with them airing movies? Hah.
Another show I'm happy to admit I watch is Meet the Press. Its how I pass the time on sunday mornings, when I'm drinking my coffee. I think Tim Russert really pays attention to whats happening in politics. Anyone who's anyone appears on Meet the Press and Tim doesn't let much get by him. He'll ask the questions, whether or not the guest has much ability to answer them is a different discussion.

So, for fun I admin in a little atheist chatroom on paltalk, and generally its good times. Interesting debates, poking fun at the less than smart theists who wander in and dont really have critical thinking skills.

However, I got ticked off this morning during a discussion about domestic violence. Party A, describes new laws in California which state that if a woman is beaten up, her spouse is automatically a suspect. As an example, he told a story of a woman beating herself up, and her husband being prosecuted for it.

The fact is, most women who get beaten up or abused are victem to their spouses. I don't think its a subject that can be taken lightly. I'm only 24 and have seen what kind of horrors and trials these women go through. I think that any claim of abuse should be taken seriously.

It's really sad. Its not necessarily about gender either. The people who become involved in abusive relationships end up manipulated, brainwashed, and stuck in some weird psychological bond with their abuser.

So what really pissed me off during the chat, was Party B chimes in by saying any woman who beats herself up in the bathroom deserves to get beaten up.

WTF. Obviously a woman who's beating herself up has some serious fucking mental problems anyways, and even if he WAS joking, its not fucking funny.

One of the things I most enjoy, I am also pretty ashamed to admit, but here it is. I love horrible reality t.v. shows. Not just any old reality show.. but the ones about psychotic women. When I'm not watching them and just thinking about the concepts for these shows, I'm ashamed to be a member of the female gender. Americas Next Top Model, a show that glorifies and exploits beauty in the name of fashion is one thats close to heart. As superficial as it is, I still love the clothes, I love the photography, I like critiquing people based upon whether or not they can stomp down the cat walk in 10 inch heels or not. The little modeling show doesn't seem so dangerous in the psycho woman department next to other shows. The Flavor of Love, and a personal favorite of mine.. The Rock Of Love. The women in these shows are almost always wasted and half retarded. They do despicable things to each other in the name of competition, not just competing, but competing for some jack ass of a celebrity that can't seem to find crazy half naked women on their own. The craziest by far, is the Bad Girls Club. The premise is that these "bad girls," are picked to live in a house, a la real world, and by living together they can grow out of their eternal bitchiness. These women are hostile, and there is serious fighting in almost every episode. Shows like that can easily make you forget that there are nice, at least semi-sane women hanging around. Even so, I cant help myself and must watch them. I want to see just how far these women are willing to go on national television. In some ways I can even relate to them, but mostly, I laugh my ass off, because those bitches are crazy.

I'm still completely amazed, baffled, and irritated that racism and bigotry are still floating around in "civilized" society. I spent this morning arguing with some tool who was getting his facts from the KKK handbook or something. It's a fact that IQ tests aren't full proof, and it's a fact that people have a tendency to do well or not based on their socio economic background. Still people like to declare that this ethnicity scores better than this one, blah blah blah. It's all a bunch of shit. People who use skin color, gender, sexual preference, etc, to judge others are falling victem to what I like to call the "petty difference disease." Whether from our parents, our friends, movies, media, religion, people fall into this fantasy ass fantasy land where its acceptable to hate people because they're different.
It's disgusting and I'm sick of it. We'll never see changes when people refuse to let go of their hatred, in the meantime I'm just going to smile, knowing that eventually the people who piss me off are going to be worm food.