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Bartlett84

30 M Albuquerque, NM

My Details

Last Online
Today – 9:05am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 9″ (1.76m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly other
Smokes
Yes
Drinks
Not at all
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Education
Working on university
Job
Sales / Marketing
Income
$40,000–$50,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Tired of douchebags telling you all the things you want to hear to get you naked and then never calling you again? Tired of clingy losers who can't keep a job and don't have a car asking you for money all the time? Tired of guys with absolutely no confidence who may otherwise be good boyfriends but they're too passive and flinchy to get out of the friend-zone? Tired of alcoholics, drug addicts, cheaters, beaters, over-eaters, and mental cases? Look no further, I've got just the right guy for you. He's sober, has a job, a car, confident, charming, and drum roll, please...) No kids! No harmful STDs or batshit crazy stalker exes! He's not even in love with someone else who might walk back into the picture at any time! He's HANDSOME. HUMBLE. TALENTED. HILARIOUS. And let's not forget HUMBLE. (I mentioned humble, right?)

Thank you, thank you. I know, what a masterpiece I've just created. Show your gratitude by writing.

I laugh a lot. I keep things simple. Although... I do tend to think too much. I'm constantly finding the humor in a situation. I read. I study. I take seriously the things that need to be taken seriously, and laugh at almost everything else. I have a strong work ethic. I don't let my emotions dictate my behaviours. I put "u" in the word behaviour because I believe it belongs there. I'm intelligent, but I'm not a dick about it. I'm not desperate, merely looking for a healthy, happy girl with whom I can share a good life with. I've got my head and my heart together, and I'm hoping to find somebody who has the same...

This pretty much sums me up...

"I'm reaching up and reaching out
I'm reaching for the random
Or whatever will bewilder me
And following our will and wind
We may just go where no one's been"
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Living it to it's fullest. I tell jokes on stage to drunk people. I've played guitar more than half my life. I'm working on a career that I enjoy, and finding my perfect little niche in it. (What have I done for my career TODAY?) I'm rarely home, I'm always on the go. Be it at work, class, or a meeting, I've always got something I can be doing.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. Spelling and capitalization. Avoiding things that happen on the Jersey Shore. Answering questions with questions. Not sending one word texts. Being completely oblivious to those who are attracted to me, while assuming those who aren't, are. Making awkward statements. Not knowing what to say in an email. Knowing what to say in person or on the phone. Making an otherwise comfortable moment turn horribly awkward. Typing random things I'm good at. Driving. Answering ENTIRELY too many questions on here. Picking the wrong women. Dating the same women for entirely longer than I should... "She'll change, man." Being frustrated with the fact that "I" is only one letter, and since it's already capitalized, I cannot capitalize it to add emphasis to it.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The dozen doves that were released as I entered the room.

Dem eyebrows.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
This is the spot where I'm supposed to impress you with my vast knowledge of non-mainstream authors, poets, musicians, cancelled tv shows, and comedians, right?

Well, I'm not going to. You can ask me what I'm into if you care to. I generally only have one rule to the arts... As long as they're done well, it doesn't matter what medium, genre, or taste it's done in, I like it.

But if you like Tom Waits, we should seriously talk.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Oxygen, Carbon, Hydrogen, Nitrogen, Calcium, Phosphorous.

Am I doing it right??
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Polyamory is WRONG.

It should be Polyphilia, or Multiamory. Combining Greek and Latin roots is WRONG.

There was a study done that showed in 2012 4,173,365 people got married.

... Shouldn't that be an even number?

There was also a study done that showed that people most commonly recognized the smell of coffee more than any other smell. I think the results are faulty. Shouldn't body odor be the most universally recognized smell?

They've made "Oops, All Berries" for Cap'n Crunch... When are we going to get an All-Marshmallow Lucky Charms?

The word Corolla refers to a part of the reproductive organs of a flower. Think: Clitoris Hood or foreskin for flowers. Think about that next time you are driving your Toyota down the street.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
At work, reminding myself why I stay motivated in college.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
When I was a little guy, I used to think that to have sex with someone, you were kissing while naked. When I was about 5-6 or so, I was in the bath, and my cat came in to the bathroom. He was all purring, being all cute, so I gave him a kiss. Then... I realized something. We were both naked. So I started crying uncontrollably. When my Grandma came to check on me, she asked "What's wrong???" to which I could only reply "I JUST HAD SEX WITH THE CAT!"

That look on her face was the most confused I'd ever seen a woman ever.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 24–35
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you feel like it. And you don't have "That's too personal, OKC!" or "Then it wouldn't be private, would it?" as a response to the "The most private thing I'm willing to admit" question. Seriously, it says "WILLING". You're missing the point of the question. Less than 90% of your pictures have been put through some kind of filter. I'm trying to see what you look like, not how good you are with photoshop or instagram.

I'm looking for something long term. I have very little interest in casual sex. I'd much rather find someone that I find attractive inside and out, and form something with them before sex even enters the picture. I'm not desperate by any means, merely curious what's out there. That being said, I'm not going to jump into a relationship with the first person who shows me attention. Nor am I going to force something to be there with the first person who catches my eye. Don't think you're the only one who's paying attention to warning signs =-P

What I'm looking for: Confident, intelligent, witty, bold, good natured, kind, and goofy. And if you're cute, that's a plus too!