In lieu of a list of things YOU ought to be, here's a list of things that I try to be:
1) My number-one priority is always to be ANYTHING but boring.
2) I will crush you like a bug--A BUG, I TELL YOU--at Mario Kart, Pokemon, or any other Nintendo favorite that you think you're great at (even DUCK HUNT).
3) I will happily join you in spontaneous song, impromptu jam-sessions, or adventures ANY and EVERY time you launch into them.
4) I'll always make the choice that means a better story afterward.
5) I will never go on a date if I can't afford to pay for both of us.
6) If we're together for some time and become close, and it turns out that you're some kind of zombie...I'm open to talking about the possibility of letting you bite me.
(Note: Some people out there think this means you can just walk up and bite me on the first date. "No" means "no", ladies.)