I'm at the downstairs bar on 14th street and its about 3am. Two friends 15 strangers and one great bartender. there's a delicious and I mean defuckinlicious pizzeria across the street thats open till like 6am....You Manhattanites know the place. Anyway, I as always had forgotten to eat that day and was wondering why I felt like someone stuck a dough mixer in my belly. Just then I get this brilliant idea to get me some eats. Being the gracious guy I am, I ask everyone in my path if they'd like some as well. my two friends the barkeep and one random gentleman obliged. Off I go...Two of these one of those another one of that...etc. Two boxes of hot heaven later I'm back at the 'ol underground bar, enveloping pizza like a starved POW. After the massacre , the offers of financial compensation began. Well, my friends, they're on me. The bartender, for obvious reasons, on me....But the random dude, who I never met before and probably will never see again, offers me $6 for his $4 slice. I refuse. He then starts to plead with me. Impressive, but, its $4 dollars, who freekin cares? I say..."look man, the slice is on me. That's it, enjoy it." He says, " I want to give you money man! I don't like to get shit for free." I'm like.."Dude! relax! its a frickin slice of pizza forcrisake! not a godamn Rolex!" He's like.."Come on man! Please let me give you some bones for it!" SO....think for a minute, and say..."Tell you what my man, you seem like a good guy, that's why I bought you the slice. All I want from you is to give me good karma. I mean really good karma." He looks at me for a second or two and finally gives in. He then waves his fingers at me, does a little spin and blows into his hands and says..."BAMN! there you go bro! Good karma for you SON!"

The next day, out of the blue....my girl broke up with me.

FUCK KARMA!