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23 M Saint Louis, MO

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 9:37pm
6′ 4″ (1.93m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Pisces, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), C++ (Poorly)

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My self-summary
"...that skinny, nerdy-ass motherfucker with the big-ass glasses." -Some guy in my high school gym class, 2009

I graduated from UMSL with my bachelor's in psychology, and after floating in a swimming pool with Simon & Garfunkel songs playing in the background I've decided to embark on a spirit journey to become the world's handsomest psychological researcher (I've pretty much nailed the first part already). I just started my first degree-relevant gig with the intent of applying for PhD programs in clinical psychology for next fall. I have this weird, new sensation that my life has some sort of purpose and direction, but that's probably just because I drank half a pot of coffee and smoked a Winston before I wrote this.
What I’m doing with my life
I work a full-time gig as a technician at a psychiatric clinic. It's a pretty fulfilling job, even if a lot of the work boils down to taking detoxers out for smoke breaks. Best of all, I mostly work evenings, giving me ample time to grab a G&T at the karaoke bar afterwards (that's what adults do, right?). I'm also work part-time as a recruitment assistant for a psychopharmaceutical research group on the side, because I'm still young, ambitious and desperate enough to work 52 hours a week as a resume builder at the expense of my mental health.

When I'm not at work I'm sitting around in gym shorts trying to memorize death metal riffs on my knockoff Stratocaster. I am the terror of Creve Coeur!
I’m really good at
Carving mangoes (anyone who's actually done this knows it's a billion times harder than it sounds), politely correcting people on the proper spelling and pronunciation of my long-ass German surname, guessing what acronyms stand for
The first things people usually notice about me
"Hey look, this guy has thick black glasses, a plaid shirt, moderately tight-fitting jeans and he's talking about a band I haven't heard of. I bet he has a Flickr account with shitty sepia-tone pictures of his beanie-wearing friends smoking American Spirits behind The Firebird that he forwards to publicists."

I look like a Wash U student, I act like a Wash U student, but I am not, in fact, a Wash U student. Dat class consciousness.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Rabbit, Run (Redux, Is Rich, At Rest), The Crying of Lot 49, V., Gravity's Rainbow, The Road, Blood Meridian, All the Pretty Horses, The Magus, Snow Crash, Books of Blood, Ubik, Never Let Me Go, Underworld, White Noise, Libra, Money: A Suicide Note, A Confederacy of Dunces, The Postman Always Rings Twice, Tropic of Cancer, Portnoy's Complaint, Of Human Bondage, etc.

Movies: Raging Bull, The Killer, Punch Drunk Love, Blue Velvet, Spirited Away, Dead Ringers, Scanners, This Is England, Stalker, Breathless, Alphaville, 8 1/2, The Big Lebowski, The Saddest Music in the World, Suspiria, The Royal Tennenbaums, Peewee's Big Adventure, Jackie Brown, Barry Lydon, The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover, Manhattan, Chinatown, The Conversation, Aguirre, der Zorn Gottes, Farewell My Concubine, Theater of Blood

Shows: Curb Your Enthusiasm, Mad Men, Boardwalk Empire, Breaking Bad, Southland, Twin Peaks, Venture Bros, Peep Show, Arrested Development, Louie, It's Always Sunny in PA, Portlandia, 30 Rock, Adventure Time, Powerpuff Girls, Invader Zim, Berserk

Music: Beach House, Kate Bush, Porcupine Tree, Junior Boys, Alcest, Aphex Twin, Underworld, Ariel Pink's Haunted Graffiti, Bauhaus, Belle & Sebastian, Black Sabbath, Blind Guardian, Boredoms, Boris, Broadcast, Burial, Buzzcocks, dredg, The Chameleons, Magazine, Type O Negative, Death Grips, Grimes, Deep Purple, Devin Townsend/Strapping Young Lad, El-P, Electric Wizard, Morbid Angel, Kyuss, Gang Gang Dance, Gong, The Gun Club, Happy Mondays, Jesu, Opeth, Kurt Vile, Kraftwerk, Liars, Lightning Bolt, Low, M83, The Magnetic Fields, Mew, Ministry, New Order, The Olivia Tremor Control, OutKast, The Radio Dept., Pet Shop Boys, Primal Scream, Public Image Ltd., Rainbow, Ride, Sigh, The Sisters of Mercy, Sleep, Slowdive, Spiritualized, Squarepusher, St. Vincent, Stereolab, Suede, Sun Ra, Super Furry Animals, T. Rex, Talking Heads, Tame Impala, Teenage Fanclub, Tool, Ulver, Genesis, Van Morrison, Washed Out, Ween, Xiu Xiu, Yes (believe it or not, this self-congratulatory wall of text is only half as long as it used to be)

Food: I have a grotesque fascination with hummus and rye toast. Never combine the two or you'll probably end up like I am, scrolling through your iPod at two in the morning to find the most respectable prog bands to add to your OkCupid profile
The six things I could never do without
1. The love and support of my family, especially my mom and twin brother (my one regret in life is that I've never pulled a "Sister, Sister"-type ruse with him. Someday...)
2. Ambition
3. Self-improvement
4. Empathy and respect
5. Getting lost in thought
6. My external hard-drive with a half-terabyte of death metal and cartoons stored on it (alright, I guess that was kinda dumb)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
What I should be doing (fencing, learning bass guitar, improving global literacy rates) instead of what I'm actually doing (making a Styrofoam bust of David Bowie)
On a typical Friday night I am
Working the evening shift at the hospital, then figuring out what combination of weird old-timey cocktails, karaoke and trampolines the night has in store for me (I don't recommend combining the three, it's pretty much a requiem for an arm fracture)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I seriously considered becoming a screenwriter less than a year ago. This enterprise ended with me working as a freelance gaffer for a Christian rom-com ("The Accidental Missionary") on a decommissioned airplane at the St. Louis Airport (someone needs to make me an iMDB page already)
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–23
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You want a gawky, well-read guy you met online to cajole you into getting coffee with him. C'moonnnnn, maaaannnnnnn