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Be_My_____

39 New York, NY Man

Man

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–99
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Online now!
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Native American, Hispanic / Latin, White
Height
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body type
Fit
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sign
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Income
Status
Single
Type
Offspring
Pets
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
For me, this is not about props, clubs, subculture, lifestyle, titles, scripts or formulas, but about exploring the intimate chemistry and intimate boundaries with another individual.

I have no interest in controlling your personal life. So none of that 24/7 master/slave stuff. I respect all boundaries and safety. I know the difference between fun/pleasure and taking advantage of someone. If both parties are not enjoying it, there's no point to it. I like to be friends with who the women I play with. I also maintain everyone's privacy. My preference is for FWBs rather than one night stands.

FAQs:
I'm NOT into needles, whipping, suspension, extreme pain, leaving marks/scars. I am more of a bare hands kind of guy. I rather see you is heels, nylon stockings or pantyhose than a rubber outfit. Don't expect whips, masks or gimps. Oh yeah, no helicopters either. Don't ask me if I'm on Fetlife. I am not interested in meeting "lifestyle" people, couples or groups.

There is no list of things I like to do. I’m not into checking off a list of stuff we read in a book or manual. It is different with each person. Each combination of two people brings about different things. I am open to what our trip or journey will be based on our chemistry.

I mention "FWB" because I believe things should start at a friendship level. Mutual respect needs to be established. Outside the bedroom it needs to be clear that we respect each other and can treat each other as friends. That what we do in the bedroom does not debase you as a person, regardless of what we do.

I am open to closeness and intimacy. I am definitely capable of loving unconditionally - an ability I have found most people lack. However, I don’t assume (or believe in) the idea that closeness, intimacy and commitment means ownership of the other person.

Do not message me If you can not let go or take a break from conventional ideas about friendship(s), relationships, dating, gender stereotypes and slut/whore/virgin constructs. Do message me if you think theres more to the ways humans relate and you are open to discuss and/or explore that.

I don't have a face photo in my profile for a reason. I'm not sharing face photos with just anyone who asks or is just simply curious. Don't start your first email with "can I see a photo?" I assure you, I am handsome, tall, slim, good looking, etc.

When you write, tell me more about what you are looking for (and why you are writing me). Is this something you are seriously looking to explore or are you just window shopping? This profile seems to attract a lot of tire kickers, the curios (but not serious), and even catfish. I want to make sure I screen people well before sharing personal information like photos, names and email address.

Yes, that is me in the black & white photo.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm not the anglo boy next door. If you are looking for Ken, keep clicking to the next profile.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Don't write to tell me about how much you enjoyed 50 Shades of Grey. http://www.newstatesman.com/culture/2015/02/50-shades-grey-film-about-male-power-idealising-emotional-abuse-sexy-when-it-isnt

I'd rather talk about "Sex At Dawn" or "The Ethical Slut." Feel free to Google those non-fiction titles. Perhaps films like "Is the Man Who Is Tall Happy? " or "A Pervert's Guide To Ideology." Yes, these are available on Netflix. I say that not because any of these titles are bibles or guides to life, but because they open up the conversation of why we do what we do without questioning.

"You do not need to be loved—not at the cost of yourself. The single relationship that is truly central in a life is a relationship with your self. It is rewarding to find someone you like, but essential to like yourself. It is quickening to recognize that someone is a good and decent human being, but it is indispensable to view your own self that way. It is a delight to discover people who are worthy of respect, admiration and love, but it is vital to believe yourself deserving of respect, admiration and love, for you cannot live in someone else. Of all the people that you will ever know in a lifetime, you are the only one that you will never lose or leave. To the question of your life, you’re the answer, and to the problems of your life, you’re the solution." – Jo Coudert

"Who's to say that love needs to be soft and gentle?"
http://www.buzzfeed.com/juliapugachevsky/reasons-to-watch-secretary-before-you-watch-fifty-shades#.jwbR11zPAP

"The values that make for good social relationships are not necessarily the same ones that drive lust. Most of us get turned on at night by the very things that we’ll demonstrate against during the day." http://www.nytimes.com/2014/02/09/magazine/does-a-more-equal-marriage-mean-less-sex.html?_r=1
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Sex positivity and the possibilities of sexual expression/exploration in a responsible, pleasurable, healthy manner that transcends gender roles, shame/guilt, social expectations and convention.

BTW, I am straight and I am not a swinger. When people hear "open minded" or "unconventional" from a man, the first thing they assume is bi-sexuality or swinging. There's more to unconventionality than that.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
What it would be like to have a something purely physical. No words. Just total physical exchange and expression.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
If you want to know more about me, just read my Q&As (there's a lot there) or ask questions of your own. If you are using a computer, instead of your phone, it is much easier. You can even select questions by category or "explained questions."
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
...you read my whole profile. You are intelligent, unpretentious, funny/silly, open minded (not judgmental), and d/d free. You enjoy submitting. Not that you have to do so off the bat. But you know where I'm ultimately taking you. Experience is not necessary, but the desire to explore is. Sense of humor is a huge plus.

I don’t have a “type.” I don’t get it when people say they have a “type.” I would get it under the premise of a serious long term relationship or partnership. But under the premise of having fun and exploring I think that breaking type is even more appealing. Because you can surprise yourself (or they can surprise you). But that's just me.

Religion, age, race or match percentage are not important in this setting. I believe there is a lot to learn from each person we meet. Especially those who are totally different than us.

I'm not looking for an exclusive relationship, but mutual respect is a must. I am not jealous or possessive and expect the same. And no, that does not mean I want to sleep with every woman I meet. Don't assume that I am Polyamorous either. I am actually agnostic about the structure of relationships. I do not think there is one way that all relationships should work. I do believe in long term committed relationships. But I do not believe that it has to fit into the mold of monogamy or polyamory. It can be a combination of the two and many other things.

I have no preconceived expectations about relationships and am therefore open to many different types of friendship(s) or relationships(s) as long as there is chemistry and connection. I do not need to know how a relationship will develop or where it is headed as long as it is healthy and mutually beneficial. I am open to a casual friendship or more involved relationship should it develop naturally.

As far as age, you are between 20something and 40something (I am 40something, but look 30something). Though I have found that age numbers don't mean a lot. Just look at profiles on here. There's 22 year olds that look like 42. And 42 year olds that look 22. Maturity/emotional intelligence is just as wide ranging (not signs of age).

I'd rather meet sooner than later. I prefer not to have endless emails and texts before meeting. We can meet for drinks or coffee/tea, on neutral grounds. No promises. No Expectations. If things go well, we can meet again.

It is extremely unlikely that I will message you first. This is not the sort of profile where I will go around sending messages. Also, I understand that this may be the sort of thing someone may want, but is afraid to say it in their profile. If you want it, show me you are ready or even curious.