Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


36 Milwaukee, WI Man


Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 24–36
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Mar 30
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sagittarius, but it doesn’t matter
Working on masters program
Likes cats
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I often laugh until I cry, but sometimes/usually I skip the laughing part!
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Writing jokes about my joke of a life!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Choosing good apples. I know a couple of yo-yo tricks. Decent Neil Young impersonation.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My thousandaire smile!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Infinite Jest, Great Gatsby, Slaughterhouse Five, Kafka on the Shore, Post Office, Native Son, etc...

Movies: Cool Hand Luke, Fight Club, Drive, Wes Anderson, Christopher Guest, Will Ferrelly stuff, PT Anderson stuff, Superhero movies, not opposed to subtitles, etc...

TV: Breaking Bad, Parks and Rec, Walking Dead, Bob's Burgers, Law & Order, always The Simpsons

Music: Hall and Oates, Brand New, Fleetwood Mac, Talking Heads, Bruce Springsteen, The Killers, Portugal. The Man, Cold War Kids, The Pixies, and the other stuff that pretty much all stubbly gen-x dudes are into.

Food: Honestly not too picky. I love grilled meat and I'm kind of grossed out by mushrooms. I'm always interested in new taco ideas. Thai food is usually a good choice; buffets are a mistake I'll never learn to stop making.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
--The sound of laughter (an adult's preferably, a child's laughter is like car keys in a blender to me)
--Looking up at the stars, shimmering mysteries, simultaneously miniscule and infinite, pin pricks piercing midnight's shroud, thinking a bunch of lame poetic junk thoughts...
--Those lemon juice bottles that actually look like lemons.
--Wordplay and the aggravation it provokes.
--Loosening my tie at the end of the work day, then loudly exclaiming, "Who's ready for a drink?" Usually the next thing I know I'm being aggressively poked in the ribs with a baseball bat and being told that I'm not allowed to sleep at the bar. Happy hour is where I shine!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Whether or not I've properly stocked my refrigerator with a week's supply of Yoplait light yogurts (flavors: Very Cherry, Strawberry, and Raspberry). Also, why is 'cherry' modified with the adverb 'very' while the flavors 'strawberry' and 'raspberry' are left to stand on their own? It's not as though there's a 'Somewhat Cherry' flavor from which it needs to be distinguished. Perhaps this is done merely to pump up the syllable count. Or maybe it's to suggest that the cherry flavor is particularly bold in comparison to the more mild flavorings of its contemporaries. I could speculate endlessly; I'll probably email Yoplait about it eventually, just to put my mind at ease!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Out and/or about.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Juding by how tough a time I'm having quitting soda, heroin would almost certainly kill me.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're into fixing horse races...and broken men!