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31 M Dundalk, MD

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 2:01pm
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
A little extra
Mostly anything
Christianity, but not too serious about it
Libra, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has dogs
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly), Yiddish (Poorly), Sanskrit, C++

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I’m considered by women to be “manageable”. Many have attempted to tame me, and all have succeeded in a matter of days. I’m like and old baseball glove, beaten down by life with a lingering leather musk. It’s completely coincidental that I cover my body in mink oil daily.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I’m thinking about opening a topless cleaning service for women. I would parade around older women’s homes lightly dusting their trinkets. I would wear white gloves and cutoff jeans. Nothing else. The old birds would purr as I would wipe my feathers across their china, making subtle eye contact. I would see the sadness in their eyes, longing for the touch of another. Sweat would bead on my face as she bends over to pull up her diabetic socks. After the brief, shameful sex, she would pay me in quarters and ask if I need a ride home.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Filling out dating site information and correctly making list! !’m good with numbers and will totally do your taxes;) (That was sexual).
Everything I am good at is nearly worthless. I can throw a football, ride a motorcycle backwards and solve differential equations. I can build a computer from scratch but don’t ask me why your laptop has a virus (your dad was looking at naked ladies).
I can twerk. No not the dancing motion Twiddlin’ my tits as work
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My ridiculously long eye lashes. Food gets in them a lot. I stare a lot. It’s not that I’m rude or have special needs; I’m just interested how some individuals have lived as long as they do.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Reel big fish . system of a down, Alien Ant Farm, Audioslave, Blues Traveler, Chevelle, Chronic Future, Deftones, Disturbed, I really want to say books are for prisoners. Talented Mr. Ripley, game of thrones. LOTR and crime and punishment. Same Harris, Dan Dennett, Kurt Vonnegut, I like my metal loud and my NPR boring and Taylor Swift dead. Pandora is great, I do get along with arrogant DJ’s I love hot food that it’s so spicy that it makes my face numb.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1, Coffee
2, interwebs
3. Pizza over 15 inches across.
4. Butts.. and boobs.. I like butts and boobs..
5. My motorcycle.
6. My dog
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Sunshine, just kidding, puppies. Math Yes you read that correctly. I don’t understand how to throw a disc golf disc correctly.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I usually find the worst bar and put on Miley Cyrus party in the USA to get the night started properly. From there I will tell the drink drone to keep bringing me Whiskey until I have the courage to order chicken fingers. 30 minutes of shame. E- cig to bring it down. More whiskey to wash away the menthol. The most difficult part of Friday night is when you realize its Tuesday afternoon.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Head injuries have limited my memory. What was the question? My computer has sufficient graphics memory.
I’m looking for
  • Everybody
  • Ages 21–34
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Most people don’t reply to my ridiculous messages. I get that. But you’re wrong and I hate you.