28 Indianapolis, IN
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My self-summary
A wise man once said, "Save my seat, I'll be right back." He said other things too, but I don't remember what they were.

Hi, I'm Bernie. Years ago I graduated from college and was shocked at first when people called me an "adult" and gave me weird stuff like "money" and "responsibility". Fortunately, I've continued my amazing journey since then, and have been constantly learning and growing (or shrinking, after my commitment to health).
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a software engineer, which means 1) I design and implement complex software systems, and 2) my family calls me when their Internet isn't working. I’ve developed an OCR system using neural nets, but my hardest job by far was teaching my grandmother to use an iPad.
In my spare time I've also worked on a (rather silly) animation, which has also forced me to learn several other skills, like music composition, drawing, and 3D modeling. All that effort for a rather silly animation.
And yet I'm proud.
Because when you work hard on something, you become proud of it.

Life is an adventure, but I can't read the map. I think it's in some foreign language or something... and what the heck are these symbols? Is that one a tree with a spork? Where am I going to see a spork tree? Oh well... onwards!
I’m really good at
Running while listening to epic Hans Zimmer soundtracks so I can pretend I'm in an action movie.

Also, I can remember, like, a bunch of digits of pi, so, I guess that's something...
You never know, it could come in handy! Like, if there's a ticking bomb, and the code to disarm it is the first 40 digits of pi, then here I come to save the day!

I also once got an Italian astronaut to quote James Bond.
The first things people usually notice about me
Probably my awkwardness. I like to think I'm just good at doing a Michael Cera impersonation.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: The Hitchhiker's Guide "trilogy", Old Man's War, and Catch-22. Looking for a new favorite; feel free to recommend something!

TV shows: Doctor Who, Community, Firefly, & others.
Six seasons and a movie!

Food: Anything. Especially if I can figure out how to cook it. But I really love Indian food.
I was ecstatic when I found out I could just make tikka masala with ordinary ingredients (although I usually use healthier ingredients than what most recipes call for).
A new recipe feels like a science experiment, and I'm the mad scientist, scheming over my goat cheese alfredo. "Soon the world shall be mine! Muahahaha!"
The six things I could never do without
1) Caffeine
2) Caffeine

Okay, so here's a somewhat less stupid list:

New things — If the universe ever ran out of things to teach me, I'd probably get bored pretty quick.
The Internet — My career basically depends on it. Also, if Wikipedia ever goes away I might discover just how bad my memory really is.
My smartphone — I cherish it more than than my own lungs. Which is probably why I haven't passcode-protected my lungs yet.
Wilson the volleyball — He kept me sane when I was trapped on that island. I think… or maybe I just fell asleep watching Cast Away. Oh well, it was easier than the time I blew up the Death Star.
The ability to finish this list later
I spend a lot of time thinking about
which Cards Against Humanity card I would use to answer this question.
On a typical Friday night I am
Possibly at home, catching up on all the shows that everyone keeps saying I "absolutely have to watch".
I also started watching an online series about World War I, documenting the events of the war exactly 100 years after they happened. It's actually pretty fascinating! But for those of you who read the book, no spoilers! I'm betting those Austro-Hungarians can really turn this war around and win the–– bwahahahaha, sorry, I couldn't get through that with a straight face.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I once ran out of soap in the shower and had to use shampoo as a body wash. I'd never had smoother, silkier leg hair.

Also, when I was fitted for running shoes, I was nonchalantly told that one of my feet is slightly longer than the other. So I guess now I have to be self-conscious about that for the rest of my life.
You should message me if
If you'd like to chat. If we share a common interest. If you can suggest a recipe. If you have a problem. If no one else can help. And if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The A-Team. *Cue the music*