I am Billy. I am the coolest person you'll ever meet, but I am also a homeschooled nerd that is socially awkward in "normal" social settings.
I have been skydiving naked. If you can't dig it, you should stop reading... it probably won't be my last one.
I have consumed a 2300 calorie pizza from mountain mikes in one sitting.
I can swim circles around dolphins. In fact, I've made it my goal to teach baby dolphins to swim in hopes that future dolphins will learn proper technique from birth and we'll have super dolphins within 50 years.
My IQ is higher than your mom's.
My phone consists of a clock. Nothing else is visible on the screen. I like shit clean like that... In fact, I'm going to post a picture of my phone background so you can see the absurdity of it's clean lines. No, you won't be able to figure out how to work it. It's that sexy.
I have a 15 year old beagle. She can run faster than a cheetah and consumes red bull and cocaine for breakfast.
I also have a red bull addiction, but I have never tried cocaine so I don't know about that.
I am my boss's boss, he just thinks he is my boss. It's better that way.
I enjoy going down. A lot. It's one of my favorite things ever.