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BlueEyedBioPhD

39 Jamaica Plain, MA Woman

Woman

Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Men
  • Ages 35–46
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 4:32am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 4″ (1.63m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Mostly vegan
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Agnosticism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Sagittarius, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from Ph.D program
Status
Single
Type
Strictly monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English, French (Poorly), German (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
“Pour me a glass of wine.
Talk deep into the night.
Who knows what we'll find.”
- Over the Rhine, "Born"

Those lyrics say a lot about what I seek in my friendships and relationships. I tend to be drawn to one-on-one gatherings in which conversations achieve depth and emotion and in which I learn a bit about what in life drives and excites and saddens and frustrates my conversation partner. I seek out friends for life and put little effort into expanding my list of mere acquaintances.

Examples of what catches my eye, piques my interest, and warms my heart: The seasons and changing weather. The way the light of day and the dark of night can feel so different from one day to the next. Curling up to watch a movie with my cat, a blanket, and a partner. A long brunch date with a good friend. Taking a moment to appreciate the intense hue of a deep red wine or an earthy whiskey. The patterns of light drawn by the sun as it comes in my windows in the early morning. Climbing into bed with freshly laundered sheets - especially if there is a thunderstorm raging outside and the man I love already there warming the sheets.

Examples of what gets me out and about: Photography - to explore the world around me through a different medium. A walking commute - to have time to prepare my mind for the day and time to file my thoughts away at the end of the day. Snowboarding - to be up in the mountains and breathe in the space and air while also having a blast. Running - to capture the meditative aspect of thinking about little other than putting one foot in front of the other. Salsa dancing - to laugh and embrace the sensual and social moments. Rock climbing - to solve puzzles through strength and balance. Hiking - to see, to feel, and to breathe the world around me. Really exploring of all kinds, preferably by foot. And, no less importantly, anything involving quality time with good friends.

A bit about the kind of person I am: I often laugh out loud at the quirks of my fellow humans, and I myself am quietly quirky and full of layers. I am not flashy or dazzling or the ‘next big thing’, but I am honest, curious, energetic, and 100% me. I understand what the phrase "salt of the earth" means, and I crave people who fit that description or at least understand what it means. I prefer a mellow pub such as the Behan in JP or Emmet's in Beacon Hill, where I often find myself talking with regulars (of the 10- and 20-year variety), over a trendy or sporty bar where I usually sit without a conversation partner and can feel myself being rated relative to the other female offerings present. If you can understand why casual conversation with friendly, down-to-Earth strangers is preferable to catching up on Facebook on my phone or staring at my beer while wondering who is eying me, then there is a good chance we are on the same wavelength.

A bit about how I live my life: I am a creative and reasonably skilled (vegan) chef but definitely not a snooty gourmet, although I am very selective about what I eat in that I buy local and organic whenever I can and am a member of a CSA because I am committed to supporting sustainable eating practices. I am vegan at home and at least vegetarian when I go out, though I have made a handful of exceptions over the last 20 years. I also reduce-reuse-recycle everything I can and swapped out the gusher showerhead in my apartment for a low-flow version as soon as I moved in. If such practices seem sensible rather than neurotic to you, then there is a good chance we are on the same wavelength.

What does this all mean? It means that I have a very strong affinity for things that show how amazing the human experience and our world are, and I am passionate about doing what I can to make sure that that amazingness is protected for future generations.

There’s another verse from that same Over the Rhine song that says a lot about how I approach romantic relationships:

“Intuition, deja vu
The Holy Ghost haunting you
Whatever you got
I don’t mind.”

We all have ghosts and skeletons and fears and needs. Anyone who can’t admit that is much worse off than those who can. I’ll learn to live with yours if you’ll learn to live with mine. But at the foundation of it all has to be mutual love.

What is more amazing than falling head-over-heels in love? It's AMAZING. I've experienced it more than once, but in each case either the intense love wasn't reciprocated or the rest of the puzzle pieces didn’t fit. Is it possible to have that amazing kind of love AND a good fit - emotionally and logistically - for both partners? I'd like to believe that there is a man in my future with whom it will all feel 'right', on good days _and_ bad. Finding such a person somehow feels less and less attainable the older I get, but I continue to keep my eyes and heart open. It certainly would be nice to trade in the rest of my solo path on this planet for a path shared with a loved one. If you can relate to http://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/01/i-promise-to-touch-you/, that's a good start for us.

I am looking for someone who will be a great friend – someone who wrestles me to the ground in play as we walk through the park and laugh and who wrestles the frown off my face at the end of a really tough day. I crave someone who is as curious about my life and the stories I have to tell as I am about his. I am looking to be with someone with whom I can have a great time on all levels, who will enjoy that I can be wickedly sarcastic at times and emotionally vulnerable at others, and with whom I share a mutual respect and strong physical attraction. No less importantly, I am looking for someone who isn't intimidated by a woman who is intelligent, who is successful, and who has dreams for her future but who also sometimes just craves a long, strong hug from someone she loves and who longs to have someone in her life who genuinely cares how her day went and takes the time to ask. Might we be a good fit for each other? If you have gotten this far into my profile and are still interested in finding out, please do drop me a note.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
At work, I'm helping scientists do and share their research better. Outside of work, I'm enjoying and appreciating the world around me and being good to others.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
If we are talking about OKC dates, apparently it is that my photos are true to life and my profile describes me accurately. (I've had multiple dates tell me this independently.) Yup - I am all for truth in advertising.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: A bit here, a bit there. I just finished an historical piece about life at Cornell during the turmoil of the late 1960's and early 1970's. It was quite badly written, but it provided what I hoped it would, which was some perspective about what life was like at my alma mater back then for a female student and what it was like to be on the other side of the Vietnam debate relative to my father, who enlisted in the navy and served there. Currently, I'm reading three books: Steinbeck: A Life in Letters (a curated collection of his letters, as the title suggests; I enjoyed snippets I saw elsewhere, but it's too soon to tell about the whole collection), New Slow City: Living Simply in the World's Fastest City by William Powers (also too soon to tell what I think of it), and The Road to Character by David Brooks (added to my list after seeing a NYTimes piece of his that I quite liked, but I'm not getting much out of the book so far). These books aren't entirely representative, though. Other recent picks: The History of Love by Nicole Krauss; Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer, which was motivated by reading his NYTimes piece (http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06/09/opinion/sunday/how-not-to-be-alone.html) based on the Middlebury College commencement speech he gave (http://youtu.be/RgGzz3fKINA). He is not going to appeal to everyone but certainly is someone who has something interesting to say. That's really what draws me to most books.

Movies: Mostly artsy flicks such as Drive, The Artist, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Amelie, and Blue Valentine. Four relatively recent picks: Tyrannosaur, which I thought it was brutal but brilliant; Amour, which was achingly beautiful and sad; Beginners, which was somewhat predictable but still touching in its portrayal of some very personal moments and of the characters' fears and needs; and Frida, which I thought was very well done. Artsy/drama flicks aside, I also have a soft spot for movies from the various Marvel Comics series, and I loved the original three Bourne movies (perhaps because I have a bit of a crush on Matt Damon). And Monty Python hits the spot sometimes, too.

Shows: I haven't watched broadcast TV regularly since I was a teenager, so I just watch the occasional series through Netflix: Mad Men, The Wire, Six Feet Under, Better Off Ted.

Music: Pretty diverse: Nick Drake to Nick Cave, Peter Gabriel to Pink Floyd, Mumford and Sons to Massive Attack, The National to The Temper Trap...crap - I've run out of cutesy pairs. Let's just say lots, including recent stuff even though this list makes me seem rather old school and folk as long as there isn't too much twang. I just discovered KaiL Baxley's folksy-bluesy music and am totally hooked. A good voice saying something worth saying is what usually counts, but the beat and mood matter, too. Or just the sound - I also have an odd soft spot for medieval choral music even though I don't believe in any sort of god. I'll happily listen to lots of things. I really enjoyed NYC's live music scene when I lived there and am enjoying gradually exploring the Boston area's scene (Brighton Music Hall and Club Passim especially).

Food: just about anything if it can be made vegetarian and preferably vegan - Mexican, Italian, Japanese, Chinese, Thai, Indian, etc. I don't mind if you aren't strictly vegan/vegetarian, but I would hope that you are open to eating such food and would expect that you are at least aware of what you are eating and have thought about why you eat it.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
…why some guys think a long OKCupid profile that actually says something about my interests and what is important to me is a bad thing.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
If there's something going on - a play, a music show, a get-together with friends, an art exhibit - there's a good chance that'll be the plan. If not, I'll be home cooking nice dinner, drinking some wine, and watching a movie. I'm not exactly into the high-society party scene, but there are lots of possibilities. That said, although I gravitate toward somewhat mellow activities on the average Friday night, if you spend most of your free time watching reruns and falling asleep on the couch, we probably aren't a good match.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I always manage to choose the slowest checkout line at the grocery store.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
(a) You are intrigued by what you read above.
(b) You actually made it through my whole profile.
(c) At least most of what is written in these two links makes sense to you: http://waitbutwhy.com/2014/02/pick-life-partner.html and http://waitbutwhy.com/2014/02/pick-life-partner-part-2.html
(d) You are NOT looking for someone who paints her nails and wears high heels and short skirts every Friday night. (I am orders of magnitude more likely to be decorated with scrapes and bruises from rock climbing or other adventures than with nail polish.)
(e) You answered the question about whether logical people annoy you with an emphatic "no."
(f) You are within the age range I listed in terms of what I am looking for.
(g) You live close enough or near enough to a compatible mass transit route that building a meaningful relationship is conceivable even though I don't own a car.

Please note that I don't respond to one-liner emails or automated OKC emails telling me "So-and-so likes you!" I am looking to meet someone who is willing to put in some effort - starting with email #1. You don't have to write me a tome, but I would appreciate it if you could give me some indication that you can form complete thoughts and complete sentences that don't contain the word "baby" and that go beyond "Nice pics."