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29 Columbia, SC Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 24-34
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 11:47am
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
6' 0" (1.83m)
Body Type
Atheism and laughing about it
Doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want them
English (Fluently), German (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
To whom it matters: I'm a Leo and an INTJ. These things mean nothing to me. Alright, queue the self-introduction!

I'm a college graduate, a veteran of the U.S. Navy (pretty good navy), and I'm incredibly under-employed but I'm trying to rectify the situation. I'm a pessimist and, honestly, the worst mix of "shy if I don't have to be social" and "lazy if there's no work to be done." I've got better-than-passable manners and I think I'm funnier than I probably am. Introducing myself is not one of my specialties.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Looking for a better job, taking it easy, and using Oxford commas.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Talking about the weather, figuratively sticking my foot in my mouth, dog whispering, playing with Legos, star-gazing (just gazing, I know the name of the big yellow one you can see during the day and a few constellations at night), and not falling down. If you ever need someone to play devil's advocate, I'm your guy.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
That I'm skinny and I look uncomfortable. Resting scowl and all.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Catch-22, Survivor.

Movies: Fight Club, Office Space.

TV Shows: Futurama, Adventure Time, Regular Show, The Venture Brothers, American Dad!, Family Guy, South Park, The Colbert Report, The Daily Show, NCIS, Criminal Minds, Arrested Development, Doctor Who, Burn Notice, Parks and Rec, The Office, Bob's Burgers, and The Blacklist.

Music: Bright Eyes, the Mountain Goats, the Goo Goo Dolls, the Weepies, Jenny Owen Youngs, the Wallflowers, Bush, the Smashing Pumpkins, the Postal Service, Death Cab for Cutie, Brand New, Jaymay, the list goes on.

Food: It's easier to mention what I don't like. Cheese, potatoes, milk, and I'm not very fond of seafood.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1) My nuclear family
2) An animal companion (I prefer dogs to cats)
3) Sunlight
4) A sense of humor
5) A temperature-appropriate amount of clothing to wear (which one might argue is more clothing than necessary)
6) Oddly specific, the other half of this 4,000 year old Mayan amulet...
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Existentialism, subtext, and what kind of dinosaur I'd be if I were a dinosaur.

Recently: if I can pull off a BoJack costume for Halloween.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Watching Netflix; sacrificing any semblance of a social life for the comfort of not having to deal with strangers in a bar environment.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
If I were a dinosaur, I'd be an ankylosaurus. I'll share any "secret" (provided it is mine to share and not one I'm keeping for someone else) because honestly I'm probably not that interesting.

I dislike most of the questions in the survey section and I'm kinda' wary of the "match percentages" that are contingent on them. There's more than a few I'd like to answer "no opinion/don't care" to but then I'm accused of being apathetic and, well... I just don't have a favorite flavor of lipgloss. It is something I have literally never considered in 29 years on the planet. Please feel free to message for clarification and/or to ask questions that are actually pertinent to you.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you want to. Whatever's clever. If you think about what kind of dinosaur you'd be if you were a dinosaur, if you can't wait until you're old enough to feel ways about things or you could tell me how old that's supposed to be, if you too think Han shot first, if you're curious about what Stormtroopers do on leave, or if you have any idea about what I'm talking about.

Yes. Han shot first. Deal with it.