The other sections of this profile are basically facts about me: what I like, what I do, etc. This section is supposed to be about opinions: what I think of myself. That's probably why so many people cop out with something like "um idk wat 2 rite about myself lol" --- saying what you think of yourself carries a high risk of sounding like a tool, a sad sack, a pompous ass, a clueless buffoon, or a dullard. Then again, if you don't say what you think of yourself, and instead say something like "um idk wat 2 rite about myself lol". . . Well, you're still saying something about yourself, whether you meant to or not, and if you, dear reader, cannot see why that kind of answer is no good, then you might as well stop reading now.

But back to me. Essentially what I try to do with my life is to feed myself with rich experiences and meaty ideas, transmute that material into new ideas and creative works, and enjoy myself in the process. I'm unusually keen on finding "rich experiences" in pretty mundane stuff, like conversations overheard in the bookstore or shapes in the clouds, although I'm also game for some more explicitly horizon-broadening stuff --- notably travel.

In other words, I'm big on savoring simple pleasures, and although I like to freshen my repertoire of experiences from time to time, I don't seek excitement. My personality is such that, when I find something I like, I tend to stick with it for the long haul. I've been buying the same cookies for years, because I really like them. When other kinds of cookies come my way (like as gifts) I welcome them and enjoy them, but so far I've remained satisfied to keep buying these ones that I like. Pretty much every night I eat three (or maaaaaybe four) of them while I read the Los Angeles Times. There are certainly nights when I don't, for various reasons, but I'm mentioning this habit because if that sounds terribly monotonous to you then you are hereby warned to steer clear of me. If it sounds sort of cute and sweet then you should steer towards me.

It's more important to me to "enjoy myself in the process" than to earn societal rewards like fame and money. I tend to use a lot of my time in a pretty easygoing way, and then produce things --- papers, stories, music, computer programs --- in a sudden burst of work. In other words, I'm not ambitious in the usual sense; I'm internally motivated and have my own standards for myself. (Yes, that's right, I'm saying I PLAY BY MY OWN RULES. Booyah.) Despite this, I do a good bit of stuff that other people care about, and so along the way I get enough money and recognition to satisfy my needs. I'm a quick learner and a sharp thinker --- enough so that in many endeavors (particularly in intellectual endeavors) I can do as well as other people do without trying as hard as they have to.

I really, really like thinking about things, and I tend to dig deeply into ideas, seeing connections among disparate things. I am especially fond of analyzing emotional or subjective judgments --- noticing how things make me feel, what I like and don't like (in books, music, sunsets, etc.), and trying to pinpoint the essence of my own preferences. This means I think a lot about myself in a really analytical way. This may sound self-absorbed or disgustingly cerebral, but if it sounds that way to you you're probably not the kind of person I'd click with anyway. I treat my self as data in the world, and I feel a kinship with others who do the same for their selves. (If you've ever read Montaigne --- in particular the prefatory "Author to the Reader" note to his essays --- that's the sort of thing I mean here.)

That said, I can also be extremely silly. Silliness is one of the simplest pleasures. Any mention of the word "butt" is likely to set me giggling like a second-grader.

Now, I said before that I set my own standards, don't take no guff offa nobody, blah blah. However, there is a special niche in my life for an exception to that. I would like to find one person who can appreciate me more or less as I appreciate myself. I would still take no guff offa her either, but I would care (a lot) about what she thought of me. As if that weren't asking enough, I would also like to appreciate this person more or less as she appreciates herself. And as if that weren't enough, I also want her to care a whole lot about what I think of her, and to appreciate me in similar fashion. And, yes, the pronouns already gave it away: I want this person to be a woman. I would also like her to be easy on the eyes.

And she must be a ballerina and have 20/20 vision and a shoe size of between six and --- just kidding. But seriously, folks. There are many people in this world whom I appreciate and understand, and who appreciate and understand me, to various degrees. I'm looking for one person so that we two can do that for one another in the highest degree. (Just one!)

So it wasn't by accident that I mentioned that stuff before about the cookies I like to eat every night. There's a question on this site that asks whether you're looking for "someone for tonight", "someone to go out with", or "someone to come home to". I chose that third option --- and I would add that that I want that person to want to come home to me. Vacations are nice, but fleeting. When it comes to relationships, I'm not looking for a vacation; I'm looking for a place to live. (I should note, though, that I'm also open to making friends on this site; so far I've connected with some cool people. And I should also note that, despite the serious tone of this self-description, I also look at profiles on here just for laughs. Like the ones in all caps.)

Now, maybe this last bit should really go down in the "most private thing" section, but here it is anyway. The alert reader will have noticed that I talked about understanding and appreciating but I didn't mention anything about love there. That's not because I don't want that. Love is what I want --- and, in fact, one of the things that I think makes me a bit different from many other people on this site and in this world is that I retain a pretty idealistic notion of that love that I want. However, I actually believe that if someone were to really understand me, they would love me. Before you roll your eyes at that, let me add that I also believe that if I were to really understand someone, I would love her too.

In other words, it takes one to know one. The particular parts of a person that they most want someone else to understand can't be understood except by those particular people who will appreciate those particular things. People's hearts, souls, personalities, whatever you want to call them --- they're like the cave in the 1001 Nights, that opens only for their personal Aladdin.

That doesn't mean I believe in "soul mates" exactly --- I don't think everyone has just one "perfect match" out there that they have to find. There could be many people you'd mesh with equally well. (Everyone's cave might have multiple Aladdins.) But I don't believe that it's purely a matter of "making things work" and that you can "make things work" with just anyone --- some people just aren't compatible.

The upshot is that I'm not looking for some mystical perfect "other half", but I am super super picky. I don't hold it against anyone else if they are picky too. In fact, it seems like just about the only way this can work eventually is if I meet someone who is so doggone picky that, until she met me, no one else quite fit the bill.

I'm getting a PhD in linguistics. I also have a part-time job as a math and reading tutor to kids. I enjoy this immensely. It's almost entirely fun and sometimes also unexpectedly, profoundly eye-opening. (Ask me about the time I had to explain to a seven-year-old what "war" meant.)

I have friends that I hang out with and we play games and shoot the breeze and whatnot. When I'm by myself (which is a good bit of the time) and have free time, my main ways of spending it are reading, playing the piano, going for walks and fiddling around on the computer. I don't play in a band or perform anything, just for myself; I write a lot of music and record it for posterity but most of it remains unheard by ears other than my own (but see below the link to my website). Sometimes the computer fiddling is of a skillful nature --- programming is a hobby for me, although it comes in handy for "real" work too --- other times I'm just messing around. Sometimes the walking is of a hiking or tidepooling nature; other times it's just walking. Every once in a while I draw a comic.

If you want to see/hear some of my photos, comics, and music, take a look at my website . Most of the stuff that's up there is fairly old, but it's still the sort of thing I'm doing with my life.

I have a very very good memory. I'm also no slouch when it comes to piano playing, writing (words and music), math, making computers do things, and articulating my thoughts. I think I've become pretty good at forming and keeping certain kinds of habits, which I find an intriguing phenomenon, although some of these are habits that other people would be baffled by. (One of my habits, for instance, is writing down my dreams each morning. I now have almost 100 journals full of nearly 10 years worth of dreams.) Last but not least, I am good at living frugally without scrimping or denying myself anything. I just have limited --- and cheap --- needs. (It's amazing how much money you don't spend when you don't like coffee or alcohol.)

I have a fez on my head.

a: Moby-Dick, The Wings of a Falcon, The Great Gatsby, Dictionary of the Khazars, In Search of Lost Time, and The Thousand Nights and One Night. Short stories: the end of the beltline and The Mansion on the Hill. Comics: Poor Sailor. Oh, and Hamster Huey and the Gooey Kablooie.

I recently finished reading War and Peace, and now I'm reading a book of philosophy articles by Peirce.

I also read the Los Angeles Times every day (on old-fashioned physical paper). And see my journal on here for a snapshot of stuff I read about on Wikipedia.

b: the Bill & Ted movies, Fight Club, The Princess Bride, Rushmore, 12 Monkeys, Star Wars, State and Main, Sweet and Lowdown, and perhaps most of all Lone Star.

c: I don't watch TV. I don't have a TV. In fact, TV is a bit of a pet peeve for me. I dislike it.

d: I rarely listen to music, but I play a lot of Beethoven and a bit of Bach on the piano, and I write my own stuff. When I do listen to music that's not Beethoven or Bach, it varies pretty widely. I like classic rock, modern pop/rock (e.g., The Smashing Pumpkins, The Arcade Fire), Irish traditional music, spacey guitar soundscapes (e.g., Explosions in the Sky). I also like to listen to super-old recordings from the Cylinder Preservation and Digitization project now and then, because they give me a delicious feeling of nostalgic peace. (Check out the cymbalom ones.)

e: When I cook at home (which is most of the time), I have a small and slowly growing repertoire of dishes that I go back and forth among. I drink a lot of whole milk and I eat a lot of fish. I like baked goods, especially things made with oats, and I make my own bread pretty frequently. Among my other favorites are Safeway Select Swirls cookies (now also known as "Absolutely Divine"), Indian food, hearty stews. walnuts, donuts, and cornbread.

I have my diet listed as "mostly anything" not because I have dietary restrictions per se, but because there are some pretty common foods that I don't eat because I just don't like them. I don't like eggs, cheese, coffee, or alcoholic drinks (most kinds anyway); this astonishes many people.

A small notebook and pen in my pocket, a computer with internet access, a piano, whole milk, cookies, the ocean.

The human condition.

What I have recently read. (I also tend to think about Proust a lot, even if I haven't read him recently, because he's so dead-on about so many things that tons of stuff in daily life reminds me of bits from his book.)

Music. (This is not so much "thinking" as just constantly making up tunes in my head.)

The future.

Sex and/or sexuality.

Love and/or loveuality.

Why people (including me) do the things they do.

What it is about things that seem the same that makes them seem the same, and what it is about things that seem different that makes them seem different.

Also any one of my peculiar fascinations, like miracle fruit or Tristan da Cunha or tardigrades.

Friday nights are not that different from other nights. I often go for a walk after work and watch the sunset. Sometimes I go with friends to dinner or a party or just hang out. Other times I play multiple simultaneous games of Scrabble on Facebook.

I prefer to be the one in control in a relationship. I don't want to wrestle for that control (although I'll certainly earn the trust that goes with it). I'm therefore looking for someone who specifically wants to relinquish control.

You are:
* Sweet
* Smart
* Sensitive
* Sexy
* and other things that begin with S.

As regards the sweetness: ideally, you can see yourself, in ten or twenty years or so, sending in a PostSecret like this about me. But that's ideally. If you just think it's sweet, that's a start. We've got twenty years.