Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


31 San Francisco, CA Man


Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 20-35
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Nov 4
5' 11" (1.80m)
Body Type
Might want kids
English (Fluently), Chinese (Somewhat), C++ (Somewhat), Spanish (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Welcome to the first-ever-as-far-as-you-know joint brofile! At least, it's our first time. Please be gentle.

Why we're here (on one account):
For all the charm, sex appeal and awkward hilarity we possess individually, joining forces made too much sense to ignore. Also, we're Siamese twins.

Why you're here (e-stalking us):
You've got a friend who's as pretty, smart and sassy as you are, and the safety-in-numbers mentality lends double dating a little more credibility.

Ideally, this works out well for everyone. Worst case scenario: neither of us hits it off with either of you, and we all shoot the shit with our respective BFF. Best case scenario: ...the mind reels. This is referred to in business as a "win-win."

If you don't represent multiple single ladies, we are also available à la carte.

Nick (aka ZinfandelSF): Creative, deep-thinking, adorable. Goes apeshit for your love.

John (aka JanusSF): Savvy, well-traveled, smoldering. Can't help winning. (UPDATE: Thanks to a brokcupid miracle, John has found a girlfriend and is off the market. With apologies to enquiring ladies and a few optimistic men)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Retitled: Our life together

We met singing in an a cappella group at college in Philadelphia.
It was man-love at first sight. In modern times we're housemates in
the Lower Haight. By day we're mild-mannered, hyper-talented office
monkeys. The kind that DON'T throw feces. By night we're caped
crusaders creating awesome where there once was lame.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
At the risk of sounding immodest, it'll be way more efficient to list the things we're NOT really good at:

Being bored
Resisting adorable puppies
Agreeing on joint answers of OKCupid's match questions
Becoming disgustingly wealthy (to be amended soon)
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Retitled: Are you actually "bros"? I hate "bros."

So do we. That's why we don't wear Abercrombie, listen to Phish or live in the Marina.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Thank god for TV; it's all we agree on. Archer is our current big television crush, and if you haven't heard of it, just try to take a moment and appreciate how much your life sucks. Then google it.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Arrested Development, Bojack Horseman... your mom?

I think we're both pretty down with burritos and sushi. Correct me if I'm wrong, John. You're wrong, Nick. I'm allergic to seafood. And I hate you. Silence! Get back in your cage.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
3 pairs of boobs. No but seriously, I'll come back to this one.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
3 pairs of boobs. No but seriously, 3 pairs of boobs.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Finding a good hiding place for all the bodies.

Not looking down.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Sooooome of this might be sarcasm. Or maybe not. I'll never tell.

And only one of us is 5'11". The other is a certified Little Person at 5'10".
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're still reading this? Really? It's not as though there haven't been enough red flags already. Know what? Write that message. You earned it.