At approximately 11:56pm on August 25th Thomas found himself draped across an inflatable mattress in a bare room somewhere in Chinatown, Boston. The slight buzz that had not previously reached his consciousness had now grown into a perceptible whine. Thomas' air mattress was leaking. Despite his unbounded intellect, Thomas remained powerless in the face of what was to come and come it did; a night spent on the cold hard floor pondering the circumstances that had brought him here. It was a time for reflection. Thomas looked back on the days he had recently spent traversing the countryside of Armenia with old friends and his decision to dedicate his life to the study of the human dentition. No pursuit was too perilous, no sacrifice too great, until this moment. Eight hours on the cold floor was too much for him to bear. He had endured the south face of Mount Aragats and the vicious protestors of the Female Basque Worker's Union but this was a whole new league of exrucism (Thomas had little concern for commonly accepted diction). Thomas' rippling muscles were provided no sanctuary from the relentless attack of the carpeted floor and after his copious stores of stoicism were spent, he decided it was time to get up and edit his OkCupid profile.
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