“The truth is you already know what it's like. You already know the difference between the size and speed of everything that flashes through you and the tiny inadequate bit of it all you can ever let anyone know. As though inside you is this enormous room full of what seems like everything in the whole universe at one time or another and yet the only parts that get out have to somehow squeeze out through one of those tiny keyholes you see under the knob in older doors. As if we are all trying to see each other through these tiny keyholes.

But it does have a knob, the door can open. But not in the way you think...The truth is you've already heard this. That this is what it's like. That it's what makes room for the universes inside you, all the endless inbent fractals of connection and symphonies of different voices, the infinities you can never show another soul. And you think it makes you a fraud, the tiny fraction anyone else ever sees? Of course you're a fraud, of course what people see is never you. And of course you know this, and of course you try to manage what part they see if you know it's only a part. Who wouldn't? It's called free will, Sherlock. But at the same time it's why it feels so good to break down and cry in front of others, or to laugh, or speak in tongues, or chant in Bengali--it's not English anymore, it's not getting squeezed through any hole.

So cry all you want, I won't tell anybody.”

Settlers of Catan.

Laughing really hard.

Bruce Springsteen, The Replacements, Otis Redding, Fiona Apple,
The Stooges, Big Star, Tom Waits, Fugazi, Minutemen, Sam Cooke, The Velvet Underground, David Bowie, Townes Van Zandt, Japandroids,
Among others.

David Foster Wallace, Walt Whitman, Herman Melville, William Stafford, Raymond Carver, ee cummings, Denis Johnson, Stephen Crane, Lawrence Ferlinghetti, William Carlos Williams, Cormac McCarthy,
Among others.

Werner Herzog, Woody Allen, Robert Altman, Stanley Kubrick,
Sergio Leone, Errol Morris, Paul Newman, The Coen Brothers, Paul Thomas Anderson, White Men Can't Jump,
Among others.

Bananas, Almonds, Tomatoes, Beer from Belgium, Avocados,
Tobasco,

William Eggleston, Henri Cartier Bresson, Chris Bürden, Pipilotti Rist,
Rene Magritte, Douglas Gordon, Clyfford Still , Buster Keaton,
Peter Campus, Tony Oursler,
among others.

The Wire
Louie

Warm grass in the springtime.

Sidewalks at night.

Long conversations around kitchen tables.

Used-Book stores.

Small pocket notebooks.

Well-earned laughter.

Running Scared by Roy Orbison

At the movies.

my soul is an empty carousel at sunset

You probably shouldn't message me. Fair warning.