I suppose I keep bothering at this because I don't feel that I have a lot of other options for meeting people. How do you meet people when you have at most four hours a week to leave the house alone, let alone to 'date'? Experience tells me that online dating leads, at best, to long exchanges of emails with occasional first dates. Second dates are few and far between (I always have to set them up, which is disheartening), and I honestly can't remember the last time there was a third. I could profess an interest in casual sex, but who really wants that in the long term? I could let go of my ideals, my preferences, and settle, but I already know that leads to dark places. I could fill this profile with erudite, eloquent, enigmatic phrases, but I suppose I would have to have some hope of things changing. Should I give up here and now? But then we come back to the beginning: Where else do you meet people, if not the internet? Perhaps I should shell out for a profile on a pay site, but one must wonder if that is really worthwhile: Do people actually encounter long-term lovers and develop meaningful relationships on such websites? Oh me of little faith!
My life is not all fear and longing; I read good books, I make amazing conversation, and I'll never admit to it but I'm not a half-bad cook. I can fall madly in love in a matter of minutes, and can summon that feeling at will long after the object of my ardor has vacated the premises. I see art everywhere, beauty in things most others barely notice, and the holiest of divinity in the most profane of spaces. I can take a beautiful photograph of anyone I find beautiful, and I can show you how much I love you with almost no effort at all. Empathy requires so little effort for me that I am occasionally baffled as to how many people manage to fail to grok the emotional states of others to the extent they do. I love to sing, and my voice doesn't send people fleeing from the room with their fingers in their ears and wishing they'd never met me.
I don't dress up for first dates. Sometimes I think that is a mistake, but most of the time I think it is important. If you wonder about it, ask: it makes perfect sense to me, but I could be persuaded to change my ways by a decent case.