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43 Bronx, NY Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 32–44
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Jan 21
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Other, and somewhat serious about it
Scorpio, and it’s fun to think about
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Has kids
Likes cats
English (Fluently), C++ (Okay)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I am not a terribly consistent person. I try, but I bounce around a lot with things. I usually have 20 projects on various burners at once, with 2-3 really distracting me at any given time.

I'm a nerd, and I know everyone is a nerd now, but I still remember when it was a very bad thing, so I'm a little old-school that way. That said, I'm not really focused enough to be a geek about anything.

I want to thank the Gamer Gate folks for giving me a handy label for my beliefs on privilege, misogyny, etc.: I am a Social Justice Warrior. (I live in the Bronx, so I see the disparities of race all the time; if you harumph the idea of privilege, don't write to me.)

I am including the following because a friend, who has long mined the comedy gold of online dating, has opined that this is vital information:

1. I will return texts and emails (Caveat: I often lose my phone, or let it run out of power. But when I do see them, I will respond.) NOTE: I almost NEVER check voice mail, you're better off with text or email.
2. I won't expect sex from you immediately (Not that I'd necessarily have a problem with it either.)
3. I'll be as honest about what I'm looking for as my self-awareness permits.
4. UPDATE: Originally this was "I have a job" Now I'm full-time school, only working part time, living partly off of financial aid and small student loans.
5. I'm willing to travel a reasonable distance to see someone.
6. I won't text people during our date (exception for emergencies).
7. I won't judge you on superficial things like which bands you like or where you live. (I will still make fun of you over these things, because I do that with everyone, over everything. I'm a smartass.)
8. I'm not obsessed with an ex (Note, though, that my BFF is technically my ex, but he's a guy now, so it's not the same thing. If this notion weirds you out at all, we're not going to get along anyway)
9. I like cats. I'm allergic, but a Claritin takes care of that (usually). Also, I'm not a cat *freak*, but I like 'em okay.
10. I'll actually show up, I won't cancel the night before (again, emergencies excepted; this would include real significant illness) or ask you out only to flake and disappear (I might be late, as I'm not great at getting places in the time it should take; cards on the table, yo).
11. I won't lie about my age or height, or neglect to tell you on my profile that I have kids.
12. I have kids.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
This Fall, after having tried careers (and majors) in journalism, illustration and computer science, I have finally given in to the prediction of my aptitude test result from high school, and started training to become a biology teacher. On the downside, they just recently upped the standards fro teachers in NY state by a ton. On the upside, I'm going to fucking rock at this.

Otherwise: Surrounding myself with as many creative/artsy freaks as possible in the hopes it will rub off. Lately it seems it has; I've had a few people approach me about illustration work lately, some of whom have actually paid me. I've produced two burlesque shows, one of which I hosted (the show went well, the hosting was awful. Ah, well). Took a workshop on storytelling, will take more.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm told that I'm really good with my hands.

I write stuff. I'm not "really good" at it, but I churn stuff out. Some of it is here. ("Beast" is a favorite, read that.)

I also draw stuff. Some of it here has gotten some good feedback.

Cooking, especially dinners.

I'm pretty good at reading stories aloud, and making up new ones.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I like affectations.

I'm told I have a nice voice.

If you run into me online, the first things you notice (so I'm told) is wry little comments. Seriously, I've had strangers facebook me on the basis of my comments on their friends' posts. Like a lot. Which is a nice, if unprofitable, talent to have.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Watership Down, The Time Traveler's Wife, The Neverending Story (NOT the movie!), The Black Company, Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett, Haruki Murukami. Poets: Blake, Seuss, Nash, Silverstein, Neruda, Williams, Whitman, Vonnegut and Vittoria repetto. Nonfictions: Jane Liedloff, Jane Jacobs, Christopher Alexander. The Importance of Being Earnest is my favorite play, and my second favorite thing to read aloud after Anansi Boys. I kind of want to be James Baldwin when I grow up.

Movies: Star Wars (originals), Amelie, The Muppet Movie, Gladiator, Killer Condom, Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter, Shortbus, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Ink, Lilo and Stitch. I think Kevin Smith is a douche but I laugh at every goddamn movie he's ever made, possibly because I suspect my life is one of them. Tired of zombies.

TV: For a long time this was blank, but lately I've been watching Supernatural, and have gotten my girls watching Buffy and Angel. I live The IT Crowd, so I don't know if that counts.

Music: Too much to mention. Create a matrix of "Building a Mystery" and Alice Cooper's "Poison" and you have a blueprint of my romantic sensibilities. Especially with a sampling of La Valse d'Amelie.

Food: Like music, tastes are too wide to list. Ethnic is good, spicy ethnic is better. I've discovered that I can throw together an awesome mole from scratch just by grabbing stuff from my kitchen shelves. I don't eat cephalopods because I suspect they will one day rule the world.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
(Note: This is not literal.)

Science, food, love, family, prettiness, the Internet
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How the hell anyone could possibly be a 97+% match with me while being monogamous.

The countless hidden manifestations of privilege. Gender. The nature of identity and kinship among differing subcultures.

Art; specifically, illustration, animation. Poetry. How I can achieve animation in still illustrations. Burlesque. Women. Women in burlesque. And stuff like this:

Freedom vs. Responsibility. Sustainability, particularly as regards urban centers. Liquid fluoride thorium. How many victims of injustice would so victimize others if they had the opportunity. Why it's more important to people to continue to be wrong and pretend they're not, than just become right. Whether art or sleep will win tonight.

Education. How best to permit children to grow into their educated, well-rounded, well-adjusted selves instead of molding them into what the people in charge want them to be. How to teach them to think without teaching them WHAT to think. How to work within a paradigm of schools and school days when I detest schools and all they do to children and imply of society.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Right Now: Studying, writing assignments, or illustrating.

Until recently, and hopefully once more some day: At some sort of tiny live entertainment on the Lower East Side -- burlesque, storytelling, music, something. Mostly as an audience, but I've recently taken a step into producing them.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I was an asshole once, for a long time. Full of bitterness and self-pity. I don't like remembering it and I live in terror of ever turning into something like that again. Which, they tell me, is a good sign I won't. But I'd rather not get complacent.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.'re a smart, extroverted, freaky-artsy woman with some social awareness, unconventional sensibilities, a "fuck that" attitude, little use for gender roles, and a macabre streak (this can be quite a big streak, really) who is not looking for monogamy or to have children -- at least, not mine, unless you want my existing children, in which case I'll pay postage. (Haha, that was a joke, CPS.) Tats, piercings, other mods, and/or unnaturally-colored hair are all good indicators, but none are necessary.

Especially if you're Amanda Palmer. I hear you and Neil are open. I celebrate that every day.

Oh, and if you're looking for "Straight Guys Only", I'll be suspicious of you. I'm basically a straight guy myself, but I wonder why you'd exclude the queer dudes. What up with that?