Yeah, you, stalking my profile. Let's play a game.
You could only be here for a handful of reasons:
1. I stalked you first, and you're stalking me back out of curiosity (yay for reciprocity!). Now, depending on what you see, do you:
a) Like the way I look? (See Outcome 1)
b) Like the things I've typed? (See Outcome 1)
c) Just feel stupid-horny? (See Outcome 2)
2. You saw my little, itty-bitty display picture amongst hundreds of search results, and thought I looked semi-bonkable. Did I:
a) Look better from a distance? (See Outcome 3)
b) Look better now that you've checked me out? (See Outcome 1)
c) Get you hard? (See Outcome 2)
3. Some weird OKCupid service (like those silly quiver matches) suggested you check me out, due to similarities. So, do we:
a) Have a lot in common? (See Outcome 1)
b) Have shit-all in common? (See Outcome 3)
c) Have shit-all in common, but could "watch a DVD together" anyway? (See Outcome 2)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Outcome 1: Message me.
Maybe it's my boyish allure, the charm of my writing, or you just plain LOVE your dinosaurs; in any case, you probably ought to shoot me a message. Either I reply, and we end up getting married, and having 12 kids, or I do the dick thing, and neglect your message, allowing you move onto someone else who deserves you, and is less of a superficial dick. What's there to lose aye.
Outcome 2: Message me.
You understand that we - all of us - are animals, with deep, burning, carnal desires. You would like, very much, the chance to possibly jump on me. Or I to jump on you. You aren't old enough to be my dad, and you aren't into scat, or fisting. You love late night dates spent... "watching DVDs", and you're honest about your sexual health. Hey, may as well hit me up and see if I'm keen.
Outcome 3: ... I sowee. <8C
I'm obviously not the one for you, so we best quit while we're ahead, and save ourselves the heartache... I'll miss you... 3'B>