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ChabonIver

32 M San Francisco, CA

My Details

Last Online
Jul 20
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Asian, White
Height
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Smokes
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Education
Job
Art / Music / Writing
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
I decided to write a two minute self summary... in two minutes... with no edits.

Start.

I moved here from LA, and it's starting to grow on me. Who cares. I know. right. Shit forgot to captitalize. this was a terrible Idea. Why did I captitalize that . spaces. sshit.

Okay, new paragraph. Time flies when you're forcing yourself to follow arbitrary time constraints. It, from the last paragraph, is San Francisco. there are many things shit.... capital... there are many things fusalkfj fufkc. im never gonna make it. Now no one will read this and like me. I know thi sto be true.

I don't waant to die alonw . maistakes were made.

-----------------------------------

Now to fall back upon a pre-written summary.

GREETINGS! I've recently moved to San Francisco! Specifically, I've moved to the Upper Haight, and gotten "up" on the "haps" (happenings) as I've "observed" a few of the locals and s"een just how peo"ple blow off a "little steam" in my neighb"o"rhood.

Activities such as public urination, throwing bottles at cars, and wildly swinging around a rusty screwdriver are all the rage up here. Perhaps you fancy a simple scream at God around 3am? Well, you're in luck. On "The Haight," these activities are available at all hours. At the moment I've been partial to a game of my own creation, that I've dubbed "Animal Shit or Human Shit?" The rules are easy to learn and it makes that 25 minute walk from where I found parking, feel just like a 23 minute walk from where I found parking.

Maybe you're saying to yourself, "Good sir, that all sounds wonderful, and I assume you've already made enough friends to fill two lifetimes. Is there any room left for me? And does that room have cable, more specifically, HBO?"

In a word, "Yes." In more than one word, "Heck, yes." Come on down! You'll have no problems feeling welcome with my new "besties" "Jelly Licker" Joe (He once ate an entire box of discarded Smuckers restaurant sized jelly packets!) and "Bindle Cheese" Pete (Don't ask!). They love giving people hugs and making them feel right at home, which for them, is the dumpster area of the local Whole Foods (Organic!), or the front stoop of my apartment (Convenient!). In fact, the only thing that may make you feel uncomfortable is just how short your fingernails seem around these guys.

So, if you live in San Francisco, and actually enjoy living in San Francisco, I'd love to chat over some coffee and have you convince me not to move to Oakland or as it seems to me, Echo Park North. Just message me on here or leave a marking in the shape of an eye with an arrow next to it on the dumpster next to the Whole Foods.
What I’m doing with my life
I write words for a video game company.
I’m really good at
Observing things... maybe? Here's some stuff I have learned from the OKCupid profiles of San Francisco.

- I am the only person that has not been to Machu Picchu, which is apparently the destination for single, cultured... backpackers.

- It is in fact, Murakami and not Marukami, and if you get it wrong, people will let you know.

- It is much easier than I ever imagined to touch an exotic animal. The amount of people that have photos of themselves petting tigers makes me wonder if there is an inordinate amount of drug dealers on this site.

- Tattoos have become quite popular.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
NOTE: The majority of this list was copied from a new defunct Myspace account from 2007 with a few additions.

Authors: Michael Chabon, David Sedaris, Jon Ronson, Dave Eggars, Malcolm Gladwell, Cormac McCarthy, Tom Bissell, George R.R. Martin, Christopher Hitchens, David Mitchell, Chuck Klosterman, Jonah Lehrer, Michael Pollan, Thomas Friedman, Sarah Vowell, Bill Bryson, Jonathan Lethem.

Directors: Akira Kurosawa, Paul Thomas Anderson, Woody Allen, Mike Leigh, Charlie Kaufman, Ingmar Bergman, David Fincher, David Lynch, David Davidson Davids

Music: The National. Bon Iver. M83. The XX. The Tallest man on Earth. Modest Mouse. Band of Horses. Breakbot. The Weeknd. The Shins. Belle and Sebastian. Matt Pond PA. Phoenix. Wilco. Broken Social Scene. Feist. Chromeo. Cold War Kids. David Bowie. Decemberists. Elliot Smith. The Smiths. Bruce Springsteen. Iron and Wine. Rod Stewart. Radiohead. Pinback. Tom Waits. D'Angelo. Das Racist. Sun Kil Moon. Explosions in the Sky. Mogwai. Sigur Ros. Fleet Foxes.

Movies: Seven Samurai. Drive. The Chaser. Tell No One. Wonderboys. The Assassination of Jesse James. Topsy Turvy. The Master. Tree of Life. Ran. Kagemusha. Through a Glass Darkly. Wild Strawberries. The Virgin Spring. Andrei Rublev. The Mirror. Stalker. There Will Be Blood. Punch Drunk Love. Boogie Nights. Magnolia. Rushmore. The Royal Tenenbaums. Manhattan. Annie Hall. Zelig. Stardust Memories. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Adaptation. Being John Malkovich. Raging Bull. Taxi Driver. Pride and Prejudice. The Big Lebowski. O' Brother Where Art Thou. No Country For Old Men. The Proposition. Days of Heaven. Badlands. Let the Right One In.

Television: The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, Home Movies, The Office (British), Boardwalk Empire, Eagleheart, Bron|Broen, Generation Kill, The Killing (Danish), Breaking Bad, Luther, Alan Partridge, The Wire, Game of Thrones, The West Wing, Mad Men, That Mitchell and Webb Look, Q.I.

Podcasts: This American Life, Radiolab, The Moth, The Indoor Kids, The Nerdist, Grantland, Men In Blazers
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Whether or not the inordinate amount of fecal matter on the sidewalks in San Francisco is due to the recent ban on plastic bags.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I often listen to the DRIVE soundtrack while I drive. It makes checking the rear view mirror a cinematic experience.

I have also been known to wear a v-neck shirt on occasion. I don't know how it happened either.
I’m looking for
  • Everybody
  • Ages 22–44
  • Near me
  • For new friends
You should message me if
Step 1: You read this profile and you were like, "Dude, this guy and I would totally get along if we were co-workers, and I was looking for people who shared my interests!"

Step 2: Pretend we are co-workers.

Step 3: Be friends.