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ChaosMuppet

28 M Emeryville, CA

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 20–36
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Today – 11:50am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Athletic
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Other, and laughing about it
Sign
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Education
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Has dogs
Speaks
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Edit: looks like I'm a moving target these days. Catch me if you can, or find me in the desert. I'll be that one asshole in black swearing at you from my high horse.

Of note: I don't really drink these days, so a bar might be a bad choice for a date, unless you know a spot with a decent shuffleboard table and a killer ginger beer. Or tonic. I fucking love tonic water.

I enjoy music, climbing, motorcycles, my dog Elwood, emergency medicine, zombie preparedness (seriously, I teach primitive skills to children for a living), teaching, and causing a general ruckuss.

I'm not so socially inept as to really think that Chaos Muppet is a good user id, but my boss just recently dubbed me THE chaos muppet of the group, and it's honestly kind of fitting.

My life really revolves around music, teaching, and physical activity. I love to go out and run, climb, bike, hike - anything that gets the blood moving, really.

I don't teach in a classroom, and don't know that I ever will, but I definitely think that one of the most worthwhile things any of us can do for future generations is to teach. Something, anything - useful skills are the best.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I teach, play music, and strive to do anything and everything that can possibly entertain me.

Edit: Now I'm back in school taking care of pre-reqs so I can become a Physician Assistant. It's all just a really complex pyramid scheme so I don't have to work in 10 years.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Starting a fire without matches. Grilling tri tip. Causing a goddamn ruckuss. Improvising things out of other things. And emergency medicine.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
All the metal in my face. Or the volume of my voice. I'm really loud. Also, my tattoos. I spend too much money on tattoos these days.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Jitterbug Perfume, American Gods, anything by Philip K. Dick, and many more.

13th Warrior, King Arthur, Red Light Go, 180 Degrees South.

Hardcore, punk, metal, bluegrass, hiphop, folk, black metal, ridiculous over the top power metal. I'm almost always at a show, either watching bands I love/have never heard of, or playing with my folk band.

Anything spicy. There's not much I won't eat and/or try to eat.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
A guitar, my dog, a good book, a good knife, a hat, adventure.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
The world is a playground. PLAY. In the street, in your home, in the woods, on the side of a building.

How to turn all the fun, destructive things I do into a lucrative career.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Out with friends - at a show, at a bar, camping, mashing around town on a bicycle, etc.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I cried when Will Smith had to kill his dog in I Am Legend.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You feel like messaging me. And you like dogs. And you're not afraid to play.