Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I know what I want out of life and I desire the same quality in a
partner. I'm a very straightforward, blunt person. You'll know what
you're getting into with me. I don't have time for games. Jenga is
a game, not my mind. Equivocators, manipulators, and gold diggers
need not apply.
I love stupid, deep, offensive humor. I'm a very open minded
individual and I don't have any issue with laughing at myself. If
we can't laugh at ourselves, we leave the job to others.
I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic. Sometimes I feel as though my
life is unfolding not unlike a movie (the genre is TBD). I'd much
rather life be cinematic than uneventful. If my life played out
like a reality show, or a sitcom with a laugh track, I'd lose my
shit. With that being said, I'm tired of being the recurring
character or the comic relief in somebody else's TV show. I want to
be the Jackie Chan to your Chris Tucker, the Bill to your Ted, and
the Buzz to your Woody.
Feel free to send me a message. I'd prefer we get to know each
other via messaging rather than trying to stuff every conceivable
bit of info about myself into this "essay." My inbox is Sarcastica
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working full-time while simultaneously writing and illustrating a
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Drawing, computers, and finding out who that actor was in that one
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I listen to a lot of food, read a fuckton of movies, watch many
books, and eat plenty of music. Too many to list here.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I'm a slave to modern conveniences. Also pizza, Mexican food,
whiskey, Wisconsin cheese, that new book smell...
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
The end of my shift and life's convoluted mysteries.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Working at a job, for money. I'm a big fan of money. I like it, I
use it, I have a little. I keep it in a jar on top of my
refrigerator. I'd like to put more in that jar.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Prerequisite: You don't live in a van down by the river and you
watch Epic Rap Battles religiously.
You should message me if...you want to! Have fun with it too. Craft
a poem or send me a short story about your cat or something. Or
your dog. Or your aunt's cat. If you have a racoon tell me about
(PLEASE TELL ME IF YOU HAVE A RACOON.)
Also message me if you want to have turf & turf, whiskey, a
cigar, and consume all of it at the same time because you're a free
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.