I've started my journey in religions this month. Though I did find some passionate and good people there, I don't think I'll accept the conception. Meanwhile, I'm planning quitting my job that I need more time to explore the real me. It might be the last thing I care about now. When I told my brother that it seems like a identity crisis, he quoted something from 魯迅 and said I'm exactly the element he needed for his research, lol, wtf.
Olivia said that I could loss everything beacause I didn't even care. ( I'm not sure she was going to say don't or didn't. Which made me think about what if she is right. )
But I found that there are so many confessions I have made here which I would never admit in my real life, what the hell, lol.
As it says below here, that I have lost my life purpose since couple months ago. So I'm looking for someone or something which would get my attention and worth of fighting for. Life is composed of routines, sucks, I mean. If you got any good idea, please tell me.
I need to remind myself breathing in and out every morning now. Looking for someone who would kindly release me from this situation.
I know it's quite negative, but it's exactly what I'm thinking of right now.
I have my mood changed in a short period, recently. It might be a problem, but there are no anger involved, I promise. When I'm upset or in a self-destruction situation (lol), a hug could easily bring me back to the world. I'm in high now and there is nothing but time could stop me by the way, lol.
I love watching movies and reading. (At least I were, I don't have enough time finishing a book after I got my job.) However, these still make me talks a lot. So if you are looking for someone who's interested in movies and books, try me, lol.
Oh, also, I'm a little busy. If I missed your messages, I had have to say sorry. I'll reply you as soon as possible.
My politic view is about left. But I won't talk about it that you may not want to fall into a intense conversation.
Maybe I'm a serial killer.
Okay, I'm going to talk lots of shit here, beacause I feel like to. Seriously, my English isn't good enough that I can't express myself propriately all the time. But I always talk with people in English on this website, it makes me feel under a kind of cover or something. Another thing is introducing myself in Chinese sounds embarrassing to me, though I could say "安安你好幾歲住哪", lol. And I type faster in English.
Yes, I would talk with my heart open; without lies. I'm completely childish, negative sometimes, too much open minded. Here comes a question to myself tonight, crashing me from nowhere. "What am I doing here? That I knew I could do much better impressing one person in real life." The fact is I don't believe that anyone would read it til here, lol. I mean, I have no chance meeting nice girls in my busy life. I don't even expect anything happens.