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50 Ithaca, NY Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–99
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 3:17am
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body type
Working on masters program
Art / Music / Writing
Rather not say
Mostly non-monogamous
Doesn’t have kids
English (Fluently), French (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
To The Lighthouse, part 1, chapter 11. I feel like there nothing else I need to say.

Alright, I will say some more things. Right now, on the passenger's seat of my truck: A 25-foot tape measure and a dull carpenter's pencil. A 2006 road atlas, both covers missing, the first and last remaing pages covered with bits of writing I've scribbled there while driving. A half-gallon jug of apple cider with a few swigs left in it. And a copy of the Norton "Adrienne Rich: Poetry and Prose", with a receipt from Five Guys (burger with mustard, green pepper, extra A1 sauce; reg. fries; water) holding my place.

I think this is a deeply gorgeous piece of thinking and writing. If you do too, let me know:
Rebecca Solnit on Woolf's Darkness
This makes me laugh:
Ali G interviews Noam Chomsky
and this is how I think human beings need to be:
Brené Brown on Vulnerability
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Starting an MFA, and teaching first-year Composition.

Alternate answer: "I remember myself. That's the work that I do." (Dar Williams)

For years, I've been building houses, and things: "I am trying to make a building which is like the smile on a person's face, which has that kind of rightness about it...When someone smiles, it is as though the fabric of the universe seems to melt... the standards of the smile, the actual contents of a person's face are incredibly unimportant..." (Christopher Alexander)

This is my house. I built it. I'll spare you all the analogies, but yes, in fact it is a lot like me.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Writing. Thinking. Noticing. Allowing vulnerability. Being sensitive (If the world doesn't break your heart sometimes, then you're not paying attention), communicative (which includes listening), and emotionally open. Kind but not edgeless, idealistic but grounded, both strong and fragile.

Alternate answer: "For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation..."
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
According to one female friend: a substantial and gentle presence (thank you for that, F.). And maybe that I'm pretty expressive, especially if you normalize for gender.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Right I'm now reading Mary Ruefle's collection of way-more-than essays, "Madness, Rack, and Honey", which I would recommend to anyone who either writes or reads poetry, or doesn't.

Poetry: Adrienne Rich, Naomi Shihab Nye, Li Young-Lee, Claudia Rankine (you need to read "Citizen"), Maggie Nelson ("Bluets", ditto), Plath yes of course, Philip Levine, Marie Howe, Galway Kinnell, Williams, Oppen, Levertov. And mine—at least, some of it.

Some prose: Annie Dillard, Ursula Le Guin (The Dispossessed and Left Hand of Darkness), Clarice Lispector, Keri Hulme, Marilynne Robinson, Austen. Christopher Alexander’s writings on architecture (A Pattern Language, The Nature of Order, etc…). John McPhee. Naomi Klein (waiting for her forthcoming book on how the climate crisis is inherently a repudiation of neoliberal capitalism).

I will read the back of the cereal box if nothing else is available.

Art and architecture: The painter Charles Burchfield. The Hungarian Organic architects–Imre Makovecz, etc... Earlier Frank Lloyd Wright--before he got old and let his head get in the way. Andy Goldsworthy (see "Rivers and Tides" if you haven't). Charles Rennie Mackintosh.

Admittedly, here more songs than you probably care to read about:

—Wilco, "On and On and On". I could include probably a third of their catalog in this list. But this may be the most beautiful song I know. "We can't deny/even the gentlest tide..."
—Son Volt, "Live Free". "Looking for/ the right kind/ of live free or die..."
—Hem, "Redwing". My favorite fluttery-feeling falling-in-love song.
—The Decemberists, "Song for Myla Goldberg" This one just plain makes me happy. I will admit to having a soft spot for Myla—partly because I liked Bee Season, and partly because she went, as I did, to Oberlin. Which I mention here because the place still means something to me.
—Terre and Maggie Roche, "Down the Dream". A song almost no one knows from an album almost no one knows. But oh, they should. "We drank his pint of freedom/ down the dream". And: it's in three!
—Beth Orton, "Concrete Sky"
—REM, "You Are the Everything"
—Woody Guthrie/Wilco, "Airline to Heaven" I love the ecstatic energy of this. Here introduced by the former Junior Senator from Illinois.
—Joni Mitchell, "Lesson in Survival". Joni doesn't get any better than this. OK, except maybe on "A Case of You."
—Richard Buckner, "Blue and Wonder". I think this is hot.
—Bruce Springsteen, "Born in the USA". A solo version, all irony and bitterness and bristling bottleneck guitar. Whatever you do or don't think about Bruce, you need to listen to this.
—Townes Van Zandt, "Flyin' Shoes" Especially the opening line, "Days full of rain...", which feels like it's beginning in the middle of a phrase, bursting out from nowhere into instant poignancy.
—Tom Waits, "Downtown Train"
—Nina Simone, "Four Women" A live version that needs to be watched, not just listened to.

More music : The National, Hawksley Workman, The Raincoats, Patty Griffin, Avengers, Gillian Welch, The National, Peter Mulvey, Ryan Adams, Chrissie Hynde, Sandy Denny, Lucinda Williams, Talking Heads, Kathleen Edwards, Martha Wainwright (but not her brother. Are all those people who love Rufus hearing something in his voice that I'm not?) The Carpenters (I had a seventh-grade crush on Karen), late Johnny Cash, Neil Young, Velvet Underground, more....

Film: mostly documentaries. Online: Stewart and Colbert clips, and Democracy Now!. I don't know what we'd do without Amy Goodman.

Oh, and about that Five Guys burger in the first paragraph: I'm as aware of food politics as anyone, but one has to pick one's battles.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I am waiting for that day
when the sky misses;

fails to color in
a small patch

between two branches, maybe
forgets a star one evening;

drops a stitch
in the moment of a bird crossing the moon.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Oh, you know. Beauty. Language. Process. Pattern and structure. Gender. The interplay of form and content. Lately, how to turn the phrase "Neanderthal Republican" into the cultural meme that it is so obviously dying to be.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
....more fun than you could possibly imagine.

Alternate answer: Banksy.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Don't assume I have a cell phone.

Alternately: I am an international gold medalist in the sport of rutabaga curling.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.'re brilliant (I use the term generously), and yet not out of touch with your heart; think would challenge me, and that I might challenge you;

...and you want a revolution you can dance to. Or, as William Hurt said to Raul Julia in Kiss of the Spider Woman, "What kind of struggle is it that won't let you eat an avocado?"

(By the way, to read what Emma Goldman REALLY said, see Dances with Feminists. She also wrote, "I want freedom, the right to self-expression, everybody's right to beautiful, radiant things..." )

And we'll go out with a few wise words from Louis CK. Safe travels, everyone.