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30 Minneapolis, MN Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 24–35
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 7:50pm
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body type
A little extra
Strictly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from space camp
Rather not say
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), C++ (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Name's Chris, bet you would have never guessed that? Here's a few things about me.

King of puns.
Master of sarcasm.
Lover of great beer, dogs & cats, and games of all sorts.
Watcher of way too many movies, and love to make fun of the bad ones.
Nerdy-mc-geekenstein, Mr. ReadyMcReadRead.
Owner of a great beard.
General ass-kicker and overall badass.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm a lead Pharmacy Technician at a local Walgreens. Yeah it's retail, but the job is really rewarding. I like working with people and I am kinda a badass at my job. When I'm not kicking butt at work I enjoy doing a bit of gaming, movie watching, reading, and the usual shenanigan making with my friends.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Cracking jokes, most of the time pretty corny ones at that. Diffusing a tense situation. Poking fun at things at the most inappropriate times. Letting my mind wander. Remembering stupid facts. Knowing way too much about really nerdy stuff. Forgetting what I was doing, or where I was going. Making horrible jokes. 'Thats what she said'
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My sense of humor and sarcasm. My epic beard, seriously this things gotten a ton of compliments. I'm always told I am super nice and outgoing.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Got a lotta love for all of this awesome stuff, going to keep it to a top five(ish) for it all.

Books. Easier to list authors, there are too damn many books. Michael A. Stackpole, Neil Gaiman, Chuck Palahniuk, JRR Tolkien, Terry Prachett

Movies. Star Wars saga Empire Strikes Back is my all time favorite movie, and super bonus points if you've ever seen Turkish Star Wars, Saving Private Ryan, The Dark Knight Trilogy, Jurassic Park, Back to the Future Trilogy.

Videogames (Why is this not a part of the header?) Halo series, all of Valve's titles (Portal, L4D, Half-Life), all of Blizzards amazing games (StarCraft, Diablo, WarCraft), Fallout series, Deus Ex and Human Revolution, the Mass Effect series.

Music. Maynard James Keenan and all his awesome bands (Tool, Puscifer, A Perfect Circle). Between them all I've been to over twenty shows of theirs alone, The Beatles, Nine Inch Nails, Eminem, The Hold Steady.

TV. I don't really watch TV much these days. Its either binging on DVDs or taking advantage of the greatest websites in the universe, Hulu and Nextflix. Batman: The Animated Series (hands-down my favorite show of all-time), Battlestar Galactica, The Venture Brothers and Archer, Star Trek TNG and DS9 especially, MST3K (random trivia, did you know that show was produced here in Minnesota?!)

Comedians, because they are awesome. Lewis Black, Patton Oswalt, Louis C.K., Mitch Hedberg, George Carlin.

Food. Pretty much everything. Except for lutefisk, that shit is mad disgusting.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
- Friends and family and all the great shenanigans and conversations associated with them.
- Books, movies, games. Love a great story
- Music. There's always some tune or another stuck in my head
- The internet and my phone, as much as I hate to say.
- A really good beer can make anything better.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Magnets, how do they work?! Being a motherfucking sorcerer. What if I could time travel, and what would I do with that power? Why our hipsters in Minnesota are considered so different from normal hipsters. Why so many people on here demand others know the difference between you're/your/there/their/they're and why I should message them based on my knowledge of that criteria alone. What if a band like Dethklok was really the most popular band in history, and if that would be a good or bad thing.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Working, out with friends, at the movies, chilling at home and geeking out. Generally kicking a lotta ass at whatever I'm doing.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
- I collect Star Wars stuff.
-I sometimes (okay.. a lot of the time) wonder what it would be like to have force powers or what if we actually achieve the kind of technology in Star Wars and Star Trek. How badass would a transporter be, or FTL tralvel?!
- I have a total man-crush on Maynard James Keenan.
- I'm Batman. Bruce Wayne is just a poser.
- The Jurassic Bark episode of Futurama makes me cry every damn time.
- I originally grew my badass beard out of laziness and haven't looked back since.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're awesome!!!

But if you *must* have a reason, here are some great excuses to shoot me a line. I try to get back to everyone at least once.

- Can appreciate the dumb, silly, stupid and funny in the world. You know, don't take things too seriously. Can laugh at yourself, deal out and take friendly sarcasm.
- You're into gaming. Whether it be on Steam, 360/PS3/PS4, board, card or table-top games
- Ya like great beer. None of that Coors or Budweiser shit.
- You like nerding out over movies, games, music, and books.
- Wanna go exploring around the area and need a partner in crime.
- Feel like challenging me to a game of Cards Against Humanity.

Or hell if ya feel like it, go for it!