I don't like mountain man beards. I'm not even sorry about it. I know it's a testament to your manliness, but anything past some nice stubble and it's usually a straight up no for me. However, awesome personalities can outshine even the worst physical deformities (which I consider mountain man beards to be)
I don't like pants. Pants are for the weak. Message me if you're willing to join in on a pants rebellion. I mean seriously, who the fuck likes those things?
I'm fat. And no, I am not being self conscious or looking for compliments. My pictures just make me look decently proportionate so they aren't exactly an accurate portrayal of what I look like. If you want someone who does yogalates and hikes 47 miles every weekend, go away (not that there's anything wrong with hiking or yogalates, I'm just saying I'd rather bake some cookies. And then eat like 3)
I wish I could change my username to something cool like the_tortilla_bandit (I really hope that someone, somewhere has this username. It would just make me incredibly happy)