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99_CrabRangoons

26 M Woodinville, WA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 12:34pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Asian, White
Height
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Aries, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Technology
Income
$30,000–$40,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), C++ (Okay), Spanish (Poorly)

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My self-summary
I don't know enough about rock climbing to have a picture of myself doing it that wouldn't just embarrass me further.

Where do I start describing myself? I used to have a nice little paragraph of labels here, but most of them don't mean a whole lot by themselves.

Main factoids are stuff like:

- I am yet another of those people who got disgruntled, flipped a table, took three shots of whisky, and said, "Fuck the Midwest!" and moved out here. I've been playing hopskotch all over the rural sections of IL and WI and hated every moment of it, although I am a city/suburb person at heart, and so I'm finally here for my shot at having a life and career I actually enjoy. This is still a work in progress.

- I nerd out about science and politics, mostly automation/robotics in the former category and class equality in the latter. I am an unapologetic feminist and abject loather of pretty much everything that can be symbolized by a fedora. If I have to die, I want it to be in a blaze of patriarchy-smashing glory.

- I also nerd out about gaming. I play things. Which things? Many things! More on this elsewhere. (Not mentioned elsewhere, I love the shit out of some D&D and MTG, although I only play like once a year because I don't know anyone around me who also plays)

- I love doing things in the city and especially sightseeing stuff, eternal nomad that I am, but I am biased toward just hanging around at home with the Internet on the weekends because it's cheaper than driving out there by myself. I hate doing stuff alone that's supposed to be more fun in groups.

- I am looking specifically for a relationship, although I really won't turn down anyone who wants anything more casual. You want to meet up for coffee? Let's do this shit! There's a party or concert in town and you want a +1? Say the word and I'm ready! You want to get drunk and gatecrash a funeral? I'm already there! Having friends is awesome in itself, not a consolation prize for not getting laid, and I'd love to have a circle of regular friends to be part of out here and in person.

- I work 2nd shift until 3am as a manufacturing technician. Evenings Monday through Thursday are nonexistent, but 3-day weekends are good. Just a heads-up.

Also always looking for gaming buddies via Steam! (see some other section below for a better idea of which games)

***

Profiles and messages are fucking terrible ways of actually meeting people. I very rarely send out messages here, and I prefer to use the IM feature to get to know anyone. If you see something you like here, in which case congratulations on your impeccable taste, we should at least use the IM service a few times and then meet in person, because how else are you supposed to actually get to know anyone?
What I’m doing with my life
Crushing my enemies, seeing them driven before me, and hearing the lamentations of their women. Sometimes, even in that order!

As far as money goes, I build power supplies for airplanes, missiles, and...uh, airplane-shaped missiles?

I really really REALLY want to go to one of the geek cons next year and am in the planning phases of at least one cosplay to accompany it. I know I don't have to have one, and I probably shouldn't break in the first time with one, but it doesn't feel right not having one at least ready.

Tooling around on Netflix, Instructables, and whatever book I've just bought from Value Village. Recommend me a title!

I am also a born-and-raised gamer in varying degrees of casualness: I love games, but I generally prefer playing with my friends! Teamplay is next to godliness!

I play these titles on an irregular basis:
Age of Empires II
Borderlands 1 and 2
League of Legends
Terraria
Minecraft
Star Wars - Battlefront II
Left 4 Dead 1 and 2
Guns of Icarus
FTL
Skyrim
Half-Life
Portal
Democracy 3

However, I fucking love being in downtown Seattle and want to see all the things. I don't care that it takes me half hour to get there and another half hour to find somewhere to park, but I want to see as many sights and do as many things as possible while here. I love SIFF and have every museum in the area on my to-do list.
I’m really good at
I can procrastinate like nobody's business, especially in the process of worrying about the near/middle/distant future and how to incorporate other people into it without appearing particularly selfish about it. Analysis paralysis should be my middle name.

Singing poorly, because I love music you can sing along with but my car stereo's broken and I keep putting off taking it out and looking at it.

Getting in trouble for being a smartass might need to be higher up on this list than it is.

Also, I'm fairly proud of my handshake. And I make a pretty damn good rum and coke.

Most importantly, I pride myself on being a good, or at least passable, conversationalist. I could monopolize a conversation, but that's selfish and gets really boring, really fast. Monologuing is for supervillains, which I am not yet. I promise, if I ask you how things are going, I actually want to know - and more importantly, I want to know what you think of how things are going. I really do care - the whole "extremely flippant" demeanor is largely an act. My friends and companions make me who I am today, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
The first things people usually notice about me
I haven't the fuckingest idea, you tell me. It's probably related to my charming absence of shame, though.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I read a lot of political history and social issue books these days, also Calvin and Hobbes because that's basically the same thing. Noam Chomsky is my jam.

For fiction, I have a huge array in tastes in literature and most of it comes down to the classics of whatever I studied in pursuit of my English degree. The Greek epics will never get old. But I love dystopian stories, scifi, fantasy, and an unhealthy dose of Dune and Lovecraft.

Also, I read a lot of tech/maker magazines and blogs to the point where it would be more cost-efficient just to have a subscription. But it would be too expensive to keep subs to Wired, Popular Mechanics, Servo, Raspberry Pi Geek, and MAKE Magazine.

My favorite Shakespeare play is "The Merchant of Venice."

I also adore the webcomics Questionable Content, Order of the Stick, and Strong Female Protagonist.

I listen to just about all kinds of music except country and rap, I default to classic rock/hair metal because Joan Jett is the sexiest woman alive.

Other bands/performers important to my well-being: TMBG, Jonathan Coulton, Weird Al, Tim Minchin, Steven Lynch, Voltaire, Richard Cheese, Bo Burnham, Infected Mushroom, Glitch Mob, Iron Maiden, Helloween, Combichrist, Marilyn Manson, and Daft Punk.

I also listen to a lot of standup these days, thanks to Pandora. John Mulaney is quickly becoming my next idol after Elizabeth Warren.

TV:
Alphas
Continuum
Eureka
Dilbert
The Boondocks
Archer
Bob's Burgers
HIMYM
Supernatural
Warehouse 13
Eureka!
The Walking Dead

I'm generally addicted to older Disney movies, because the soundtrack for The Hunchback of Notre Dame is absolutely amazing and never gets old. But I like pretty much any kind of movie if it's done well (but I have a soft spot for zombie movies regardless of quality).

Food = I eat everything that doesn't have olives or mushrooms in it. Preferably pasta. Pizza is my go-to, followed closely by "whatever the fuck I'm closest to at the moment I get hungry." Do not get between me and the Kraken rum.

Also, I love eggs but I don't know how to make them in any other form except "scrambled." Please teach me.
The six things I could never do without
The bottom two tiers of Maslow's Hierarchy are a given, so instead I'll list the enjoyment I get out of just pointing and laughing at the idea of listing them. "Hurr hurr I literally couldn't live without oxygen and food, aren't I marketable!"

My education (and also as many opportunities to expand on it as possible)

My fervor for making the world a better place for as many people as possible, in as unorthodox of a way as possible.

A plan (with or without the canal: Panama!).

I'm pretty sure I couldn't survive for long as a member of the middle class of the 21st century without an appreciation for irony.

Finally and most importantly, a healthy contempt for arbitrary authority structures.

Oh, and also a blatant disregard for rules. (Count 'em!)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How do I eventually find a job that will let me work without needing to wear pants. And isn't that what the American Dream is all about?

Puns in the form of jokes. Most of them are bad, but I enjoy every one.

"How many friendzoned guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they'll all just throw a few compliments at it and then complain when it won't screw."

"Why do white girls always travel in odd-numbered groups? Because they can't even."


God's last name. I'm pretty sure it's "Dammit."

Also, a little of everything in subjects that actually matter. I like being at least mildly well-informed on how the world works (or more accurately, how it doesn't).

Politics (especially civil rights and the interference of it caused by religion)

Technology (especially home automation, robotics, and drone tech)

Wealth inequality and other forms of discrimination

What kinds of subjects I would make out of these if I were to start blogging again

Work, school things, and anything related to whatever I'm teaching myself at the time via Codeacademy or any of my dozens of books

Anti-intellectualism. If you want to piss me off, pick a social issue and try to convince me not to care or talk about it because "it doesn't affect me personally." EVERYTHING affects us somehow, and you know what? If you wait until it's banging on your front door to actually think about whether it's affecting you, you're on the business end and it's likely too fucking late to change it. Also as an engineer, technician, and student by trade, how anyone can see a problem and NOT be curious to solve it, or at least understand why it's working as it is, is beyond me.

Also, you're probably familiar with the concept of Schrodinger's rapist. I can almost guarantee you are, whether or not you've actually heard the term. Anyway, I discovered this concept fairly recently, and between this, the Golden Rule, good old-fashioned humanism, and my extreme contempt for the concept of the so-called friend zone and anyone who takes it seriously, I take my interactions with women extremely seriously, no matter the nature of the relationship at the time. I take mutual consent and enthusiastic participation as prerequisites without which no social context has any right to exist in the first place. I refuse to treat other people as my pet projects, and I expect the same courtesy from anyone else regardless of environment. I may be disgruntled and overall lonely, but that is entirely my own responsibility to deal with, without placing even the suggestion of blame on anyone else. TLDR: Social intimacy is a human need to search for, but not a human right to be demanded of others. This is the foundation of all of my relationships.

Also, why the fuck am I still awake. Oh, right, it's because I only get in from work at 3am.
On a typical Friday night I am
Procrastinating while slightly drunk. Cleaning, watching movies on Netflix, and/or gaming with friends. Sometimes all of the above at the same time.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I was in the army a few years back, but I was discharged before I could be promoted even once.

*beat*

Get it? PRIVATE? OH I SLAY ME.

Yep, finest boyfriend material available, right here.

****
Serious note. If I have starred you or otherwise tend to visit your profile more than once or twice, it's because I like you but have no idea how to introduce myself effectively (not least because of how awful dating sites actually are at encouraging people to interact). I am incredibly out of practice at the whole relationship thing, having never been especially good at it in the first place, and because I am entirely serious about not wanting to come off as feeling entitled to your company (as stated above), I am in general initially cripplingly shy/devoid of self-confidence when it actually comes to introducing myself to anyone here. Please, for the love of Cthulhu, feel free to message me first.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 22–28
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
If you know what you want (a relationship, preferably), and you happen to see pretty much anything here you think would make a decent springboard into a conversation, possibly leading into something more involved. And even if you want to bring in some completely different topic altogether! Non-sequiturs are the spice of life!

At the very least, if you have something to say that shows you made it through the massive wall of text above. While a message just saying "hi wats up" is momentarily flattering, I think I've been called every possible spelling of "cutie" with nothing to back it up, and at this point it's about as endearing as having athlete's foot. In the words of Captain Picard: "Engage."