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30 Carbondale, IL Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 22-36
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Online now!
Relationship Type
5' 9" (1.75m)
Body Type
Average build
Agnosticism and laughing about it
Working on Post grad
Doesn’t have kids but might want them
Has dogs
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Apparently I'm a coffee snob, so that's what a friend suggested when I decided I absolutely had to change my username. I may be a snob, but it's good-natured (I hope, anyway). And I'm looking for the Liz Lemon to my Criss Chros. Or the Abbi to my Ilana.

I'm originally from Indiana. I moved to Boston for grad school, but now I'm in Illinois for a second round of grad school. I write this because I feel far more at home in a big city like Boston than I do in a small town. Anyway... I finished my Masters degree in philosophy (in Boston), and am now working on a PhD in the same. I spend a lot of time reading, but I also enjoy getting out and having adventures. When I feel the need to be in a city, I'll escape to STL. I really like the loop (who doesn't?) and finding places to have a unique cup of coffee. I, like seemingly everyone on this website, like running and being active. My dog Lexie is my running buddy.

Both my best friend and my dog are allergic to peanuts/peanut butter. Both are also unable to swim and ride a bicycle (not that unusual for my dog, but for a person...)

I'm a very patient person, and take pride in my habit of always giving others time to speak their mind. I am looking for someone who is also willing to listen to others before judging, and who values kindness, patience, and communication over trying to achieve some normative version of a good life.

It's also become apparent that people I date are sometimes surprised that I turn out to be rather affectionate and romantic. Apparently my profile and/or in-person interactions make me initially seem *very serious*, but once I get to know someone, I become really caring. I dig all the cheesy, sappy stuff that goes along with dating (but without the oppressive gender role baggage). You don't have to be super romantic in the same way, but at this point, that's something about me that probably won't change. If you're looking for a goofy, affectionate, and supportive person, I'm your guy.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm back in school for a PhD in philosophy. I primarily work in ontology and the various reactions to metaphysics that popped up in the 20th century, however I also enjoy other areas of philosophy.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Brewing beer, skiing, playing games that don't involve math, trivia, poker, and multi-tasking.

Getting in trouble on trains in Sweden for illicitly smoking in the company of folks from North Korea.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
(At a certain point, people move from having what they "like" and their favorite things define them to their identity being about who they are and more importantly, what they do. I'm looking for someone with an identity composed of what they do and how they treat others rather than someone who defines themselves by their "likes." That written, here are some of mine...)

Books: A Song of Ice and Fire (R+L=J&M), Kitchen Confidential, Great Gatsby (I fit stereotypes sometimes...), House of Leaves, anything by Chuck Klosterman, Heart of Darkness/Things Fall Apart (I think they should be read together), The Giver, My Name Is Asher Lev, Norman Mailer, and lots of philosophy books and articles

TV: Parts Uknown (or any Bourdain), Seinfeld, Buffy, Californication, 30 Rock, Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Happy Endings, The West Wing, Firefly, Game of Thrones, Community, Friday Night Lights, Archer, Broad City

Movies: The Matrix (The Matrices{?}), La Jetée, Apocalypse Now, Punch Drunk Love, Young Adult

Food: sashimi, sushi, pizza, cajun, anything very spicy
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My dog, (good) coffee, (good) beer, books, a way to write (pen and paper or my laptop), my friends, Notre Dame football, ignoring OKC list limits.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
What we mean when we say something "is" or what it means to "be," time, humanity as a concept , and how we use language to understand/shape the world around us.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Reading or writing--the life of a grad student.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.'re willing to have good discussions about topics both serious and not, you have a sense of humor about yourself, and want to get to know one another (at some point) over a good cup of coffee or a drink.

If you think 808s & Heartbreak is tragically underappreciated.

Also, if you consider yourself a feminist (or at least have a favorable opinion of feminism), shoot me a message--I'm honestly shocked at the number of women I meet who are anti-feminists, and I'm getting tired of facepalming and/or trying to convince a woman why being a feminist is a good thing.

If you are homophobic, racist/bigoted, feel nostalgic for the antebellum south (yes, this comes up), or are very serious about traditional gender roles, we probably won't get along well.