I'm the Egyptian Lover with Slick Rick dropping beats in the background.

Mixing vodka with Skittles & moderating OKC profiles. Yup, they've bestowed the power upon me to look at pictures of dick all day long so you don't have too. Jelly?

I've seen things that can't be unseen. You can thank me with a beer.

Entertaining myself. This profile is the epitome of that.

My glowing personality. I'm like Bruce Leeroy in The Last Dragon. I posses that power, I posses that glow.

Deaf. Dumb. Blind.

The word six first came into English use in 1844. I was flabbergasted when I found that out.

Flabbergasted was first used around 70 years earlier, it has since fallen out of our daily lexicon unless you're hanging with me.

How serious people are taking this profile once they make it this far, if they make it this far. Life is short. If you can't have a bit of fun, fuck it.

Living out the saddest country song ever written. What makes it even worse is that I hate country music.

I prefer tea to coffee and beer to salad. Okay, I kind of like salad... and Kale chips. I am pretty much going to eat Kale chips like an OG till I die. But I will do so with beer. HEALTHY BALANCE.

You like face hair. I'm in my face hair period.

You like the unusual, strange and weird. Also being a fan of the thesaurus is a plus or anything that ends in saurus.

You like the Heights & Montrose. I don't like the burbs, sorry. We could still hang, it just wouldn't be super often.

You want to ride a bike with me.

You are interested in meeting new people, in person. I'm cool with penpals, just make sure to state that early on. Especially if you live 3 miles away. ;]