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ComradeHael

27 Baltimore, MD Man

Man

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–37
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Apr 18
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 4″ (1.93m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly vegetarian
Smokes
No
Drinks
Often
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Pisces, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from two-year college
Job
Technology
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Has dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Okay), Spanish (Poorly), Chinese (Poorly), Swedish (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Sometimes I want to forget all the lessons I've learned from my mistakes.

UPDATE 1/11/13
Seriously considering scrapping this and starting over because c'mon this is getting ridiculous but that seems like a lot of and I think this profile has, for better or worse, managed to create a fairly vivid impression of me.

I'm about to finally get my Associate's degree in Geographic Information Systems or Geospatial Applications or whatever they call it and lately while I've been putting together my portfolio and finishing up I've been really wanting to talk to anyone involved in the field or studying it. So if you're into it, or interested, please message me.

After I get that degree I'm leaning toward returning to UMD Colege Park to finish my Aerospace Engineering bachelors I got 3/4 of the way through half a decade ago. Then I can do the Space GIS I love although I'm also really interested in using it for environmental science and particularly for climate change which has been a growing concern for me lately. And I have some vague ideas of maps I want to make concerning historical archaeology.

Also I've been studying Swedish for a few months so if you know it I definitely want to talk to you. I like learning from audio things and websites but I always get too intimidated to talk to native speakers and that's something I need to work on. So lemme try real quick:

Hallå. Jag heter Joe. Jag är amerikan. Jag talar inte svenska så bra, men jag vill talar med dig. Jag tror inte att jag vill åker till Sverige. Jag inte tycker kallt. Knulla Finland.

Well that's about a month's lessons. Let me know if any of that made sense. I'm hoping at some point I'll know enough that I can pick up enough Icelandic to understand Sigur Rós songs.

Also I've been meaning to brush up on my Spanish which I learned a fair bit growing up in Houston but never use and is really rusty.

In lieu of updating everything, other recent developments:

Newer movies I've liked:
Holy Motors (especially the Accordion interlude)
Looper
Beasts of the Southern Wild
The Dark Knight Rises (something about Bane and his voice I just love an wish I could impersonate)
Seven Pyschopaths (I absolutely loved this one)

Books I've read recently (if you count audiobooks):
America Again: Re-Becoming the Greatness Weren't - Stephen Colbert
That is All - John Hodgman
The Republican Brian - Chris Mooney

Books I'm in the process of reading and switch back and forth between:
Zoobiquity: What Animals Can Teach Us About Health and the Science of Healing - Barbara Natterson-Horowitz , Kathryn Bowers
The Language Instinct: How the Mind Creates Language - Stephen Pinker
1491: New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus - Charles C. Mann

If you have any recommendations of similar books you think I might like please tell me. Unfortunately I'm usually really bad about reading actual physical books so I tend to stick to things with audio book versions.

And I've been looking for a good book on climate change that does a good job of explaining the science and the looming impacts but haven't found anything that really grabbed me yet.

Turtles
I'm planning on digging a pond in my parents' backyard this spring because my mom has always wanted one and as a home for my turtles who are getting way too big for their tanks. Plus I think two of them have started trying to mate. I caught the larger, presumably female, red-eared slider swimming around the tank with the smaller, I guess male, one attached at the rear dragging along. It seemed painful but I've seen him try to mount her a few times more. So if you know anything about making ponds, or keeping turtles outdoors in Maryland, or turtle sex, also let me know.

And finally my new ideal home, instead of something as pedestrian as a zeppelin, would now be a giant space ship designed as a seed ship with collections of many plants and animals. It would not be called The Ark as that is too obvious.

END OF UPDATE
The following is probably madness but it still probably mostly accurate.

UPDATE 12/9/11
I really should like go through this and update things but that seems like a lot of work so my only real update is that my hair is even longer. Oh and I'm back in school. And one of my maps got published which is pretty cool. I'd link to it but that would give away personal information. So instead I'll say hey look at this cool map here

Whoever made that map must be pretty awesome and also handsome but not really in a traditional way. Try not to stalk him too much.

Plus also that going to the Sudan (South Sudan) thing might be back on for next summer. And last time I checked the CIA's factbook page on it it said the median age there was 18. That's so weird. I wonder where all the older people go to retire?

Earlier Ramblings
First of all I wrote all this over a period of many months and my memory only lasts a few weeks so I have no idea what it says and don't feel like reading it. However I still stand by it all completely. Especially the stuff that contradicts the other stuff.

I really like to learn things. One of the things I like to learn is languages though I never get very far in any. Right now I want to learn Icelandic, Basque, Catalan, ancient Akkadian, Mandarin, and Arabic. Simultaneously. Also every other one, dead or alive. Especially language isolates. If you you could help with any of that that would be fantastic.

I like to talk to people who know more about a subject than I do because I'm usually better at casual learning. Right now I'm especially interested in neuroscience, linguistics, and chaos theory, but if there's knowledge I want it inside me. Also I love robots. Both the pleasure kinds and the destroy all humans ones.

Also I've been a vegetarian for 9 years for some reason I haven't quite figured out yet.

I left college after studying aerospace engineering or 3.5 years because it suddenly dawned on me that it is boring as hell. Now I'm going for a degree in GIS because it should be easy to get a decent job and it's interesting. I'm planning on combining it with astronomy and doing some kind of crazy space geography.

Update: Got bored of that, too. Now I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I'm probably going to this group home farm thing in Vermont for crazy people for the next six months. They have alpacas so that should be cool.

Update of update (12/9/11): Bored of that. Back to GIS.

I like computers and animals and computerized animals and could see myself working with any of those. Also I really want to learn to fly. Like a plane. Not flapping my arms. Or actually that, too.

My ideal world involves a post apocalyptic steam punk scenario where i have a self sustaining dirigible with a closed life support system and hanger of assault/defense craft. We would transfer cargo from land to land or maybe be pirates or something. I foresee a permanent crew of maybe 30 or so. 2 pilots for the dirigible (named the Cassiopeia), 8 gunners around the sides, 12 fighter pilots, me (the captain), my XO, a medic, a cook, a handful of engineers and mechanics and various rogues and vagabonds to grow food, make clothes, give the place character. To this end I have begun researching airship mechanics. Thus far I have found that while heated air can make a balloon envelope rise through the air, it is both imprudent and ineffective to attempt this while inside the balloon. Further research is needed.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm going to use this section instead to condemn OkCupid's blatant anti-Robot discrimination. I received this as part of a message from their administration.

"If you're
a bot, ignore this message. You can't really read, so it will
be wasted on you, and you should value your last few minutes of
life since we're going to gut your account shortly. Bad robot!"

They ban members just for being robots! Plus I've seen many people on here with pictures of robots with a red cross through it clearly expressing their hatred of robots. Or something. I can't be bothered to hold my mouse over it to confirm it. Plus a lot of websites have those captchas to block innocent robots from participating. Some even blatantly call them "human checkers." It is clear that the only way to end this kind of discrimination is to destroy all humans.

Also I don't wanna be a dick or nothin' but if this singularity thing pans out you guys are screwed. Just sayin'...

Also I want to join some kind of commune. I don't care much about details so long as it is environmentally friendly without being too Luddite-esque or religious. I just want a group of people to pool our fortunes and futures together. Anyone with me?

At some point I hope an organization my mom is working with will send me over to the Sudan to maintain their computer network at a remote learning center there where out of country educators teach local villagers to teach. I figure the one class I had in fencing will come in handy for the many machete battles I have foreseen. After that it's back to dirigibles.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Not answering the questions posed to me. Shit wait...
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
That I'm a ninja. Wait no, that's the last thing they notice. No I mean they don't notice that at all. Let me start over...

I would guess my height since I'm nearly 6'5". Some people claim I am a blond but I maintain that my strawberry blond hair makes me a daywalker. Also my hair has gotten really long now so people comment on that a lot. I'm also really quiet in person until I get to know you. But when I'm with a bunch of other shy or quiet people I tend to take the leader position. And I ramble. A lot. As you can probably tell. About all sorts of topics you won't be interested in.

Also someone said I smelled like "newspaper print novels and warm sleep." Not sure what that means but there it is.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Movies: Melancholia is the best movie I've seen in a looong time. Anything David Lynch. I don't understand any of it but I always want more. I want to live in that strange universe of his. Never Let Me Go, Che Part 1, Antichrist, Moon, If...., Le Diable Probablement, A Clockwork Orange, The Dark Knight, There Will Be Blood, No Country for Old Men, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Aliens, Alien, Blade Runner, Pan's Labyrinth, The Devil's Backbone, Children of Men, City of God, Inception,Idiocracy, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, anything Studio Ghibli/Miyazaki, anything with robots in it especially if they win. I also love rifftrax.

Music: I am in love with Joanna Newsom

Sunset Rubdown, Elliott Smith, Klaus Nomi, David Bowie, Daft Punk, Kraftwerk, Radiohead, Neutral Milk Hotel, Cloud Cult, Bowie again, Xiu Xiu, Animal Collective, (I went to the same middle school that a couple of the members went to and my best friend's older brother was in their class and was good friends with them, so by the commutative property of best friends Animal Collective is my best friend. I recommend that you be jealous), Sigur Rós, Mika, The Smiths, more Bowie, New Order, Joy Division, Depeche Mode, Wolf Parade, TV on the Radio, Passion Pit,Bauhaus, Sisters of Mercy, The Clash , The Pogues, Tom Wait, the Decemberists, Explosions in the Sky, Roy Harper, The Notwist, Flight of the Conchords, Iggy Pop with or without the Stooges, Muse, Rage Against the Machine, Yes, Journey, and Bowie.

Hell just go to my last.fm page: http://www.last.fm/user/comradehael
Update I have only been using my phone for music lately so my last.fm may not be representative of my current taste. The main stuff is still the same but lately I mostly listen to Sunset Rubdown, sometimes Pumpkins and Animal Collective still. Bon Iver and Elliott Smith when I'm down. And of course Joanna. Plus I'm really digging live Sigur Rós albums.

Books: A Song of Ice and Fire by George R. R. Martin (stuck on the last one because arrghghh Dany), Besides that haven't been doing much reading. I got a kindle fire (it took me like 3 months after I heard about it to realize the pun in the name) recently though and I am much better with e-books and audiobooks so that should change. Past favorites: anything by Richard Dawkins, non-fiction about science and especially space, Gödel Escher Bach, books by Iain/Iain M. Banks, Specutalive stuff about space colonization and mining. Oliver Sacks. Especially if it has lots of equations and charts and graphs and tables.

Mmmm... data. Like I've spent hours looking at different reports from the CDC and other places just for those sweet sweet tables. Doesn't even matter what the subject is. I can also spend hours on wikipedia clicking from link to link. I'm especially fond of reading ancient history and linguistics that way.

TV: Game of Thrones, Dexter (ok now it's nothing but a guilty pleasure that I wouldn't recommend to someone but still can't stop watching), Archer, The Wire, Futurama, Rome, Lost, 30 Rock, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, The Venture Brothers, Community, Also I love nature documentaries, especially if it involves David Attenborough
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My brain (unless it was replaced with a better, robot one)

My spaceship and/or dirigible(when I get one and/or 12)

My 6 turtles (unless they were replaced by better, robot ones)

[STRIKETHROUGH PRETEND PLEASE]
My external harddrive. It has my collection of movies, books, music, and a ton of audio lecture courses on dozens of subjects and languages to save in case the earth is destroyed and I'm somehow not.[/STRIKETHROUGH PRETEND] It died :( Now no one will ever know about human history. [UNSTRIKETHROUGH PRETEND] It's alive again. So my zombie harddrive is back on the list.
Ok I've had and lost about 5 more since then. I'd better find a better way to store data. I'm thinking wax cylinders.

My epee. I have never been in a situation I could not fence my way out of. (I have not been in any situations)

Stars. I like to look at them.

Trees. I plan to have some on my spaceship/dirigible as well.

My hair which is the source of most of my power why not.

My turtle ring which is the source of the rest.

My inability to count to six.

Also I am inordinately fond of cheese.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Science, immortality, revolution, nuclear apocalypse, space, flying, robots, starting an anarchist collective

While the economic benefits of an asteroid mining industry is undeniable (asteroid 16 Psyche alone is estimated to contain enough iron-nickel ore to supply the earth for millions of years), often overlooked are its residual impacts on society at large. The enormous startup capital required to produce these mining operations would require transnational corporations of sizes never before seen. While the inevitable corporate corruption will make for fascinating situations (cf. Aliens, Blade Runner), the most important role of the asteroid industry will be the introduction of the personally piloted spaceships much loved by sci-fi fans. These craft would serve no purpose in traditional space ship to ship combat since with no gravity or atmosphere it would be easy to fire either laser or conventional weaponry with extreme accuracy. However while transferring precious cargo long distance weaponry would be ill advised and it is likely that escorts will be wanted on hand that are able to rapidly deal with developing threats. Basically: space pirates. It's gonna kick ass.

Sometimes I think it would be awesome to have the power to freeze time for everything but me but then I realize transportation would be a nightmare and I'd have to walk everywhere and I'd really only ever use it for pranks.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I really can't tell the days apart very well. Also I really want to be nocturnal. That's unrelated but still.

I'm using this section becacuse it's emptiest. Be honest: ponytail or not? I've long resisted it because I thought it would look weird but it's really annoying when my hair always gets in my face and drinking out of water fountains is impossible. It's not as weird looking as I expected but I still don't know. Someone said it made me look like destruction from sandman (http://media.comicvine.com/uploads/2/26544/731340-destruction.jpg) which is pretty cool I guess.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'll just use this to say I don't really care for the IM thing this has. If IMs are more your thing than mail my AIM is Czarhael, my MSN is czarhael@live.com. 99 percent of Yahoo messages I've ever received were spam so I never even sign on anymore.

Email is joeobrien4@yahoo.com

But really the mail feature here is ideal. Sometimes I'll talk with someone here for a bit not feel like talking to anyone for a few months and then when I come back I don't know if I can message them again because would that be weird?

Oh and I've had lyme disease pretty bad and had to stay in the hospital for a few days and if my understanding of virology is correct that means I am slowly tuirning into a giant tick and will one day latch onto an unsuspecting human and gorge myself on their blood before laying my eggs. Or I would if I were a female. I'm not sure what male ticks do but apparently they look something like this: http://images1.makefive.com/images/200844/6cd46aceb33ad9f4.jpg
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Determinism makes you.

I'd like people just to talk to, especially if they're from different countries but anyone is cool. Even uncool people.

I'm also looking for someone to go exploring with, to hang out and watch movies with, to engineer advanced strains of viruses designed to devastate the world's population reducing it to a barren wasteland with, and maybe minigolf. Also to end sentences with prepositions at with.

Just because I look at you profile and don't message doesn't mean I'm not interested. If anything it means I am and am a bit shy. So if you see me look at you and I don't repulse you, send me a message. Anything. I'll find something we can discuss.

Finally. I hate sections like don't message me if... whatever. I'm looking for friends and I have no restrictions on that, age, geographical, interests or otherwise (vastly different tastes in music maaay be a problem, but surely we'll have something else in common). With the exception of winks, I always reply to messages.