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34 M Portland, OR

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 24–45
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Strictly other
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
English (Fluently), French (Poorly), Japanese (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I am originally from Chicagoland. I've lived in Portland for nearly 12 years and have done much of my adult "growing up" here. I didn't land here with a dream job or a perfectly clear picture of what I expected out of my life. It was certainly challenging, particularly coming from a place where people mean what they say and do what they say they are going to do.

For those keeping score in the Meyers-Briggs end of things, I come out an INTJ. Or less than 2% of the American population. I spend lots of time in my head, find small talk painfully annoying, and don't possess the social intelligence of extroverts. That doesn't mean I can't be social! My work requires me to socialize for 7 hours a day!

I've been to several countries in Europe and Asia but moving to Portland was a major failing forward.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm continually failing forward in order to achieve success in life.

I go to bed every week night at 9:30 and make breakfast from scratch every morning including a cup of tea to be on my game for work by 6 a.m. I am a highly disciplined person, and justifiably proud of it.

I'm failing forward in all aspects of life. Playing music is a big part of that. But so is maintaining my alternative lifestyle. I'm currently preparing to blow a coworker's mind through the sampling of one of Mother Earth's most magical creations: coconut oil.

I play the bass guitar/electric bass and have done so for 19 years. It is without question the greatest instrument invented ever because when it is played with skill it can bring an audience into a concert from off the street! This was a fun performance. "Dead End Street" by The Kinks, with horns. I'm semi-conducting the horns:

Rock and roll...doesn't pay the bills.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Giving good phone. It's a rare quality to be able to maintain a captive audience for several hours on the phone and have them go "Wow, where did all the time go?". Influencing people in bettering themselves. Speaking and singing with my fingers. Taking risks. Not taking "no" for an answer. Making complete and incomplete strangers laugh. Being funny requires a sense of humor, but having a sense of humor doesn't mean one is funny. Being an anachronism. It has nothing to do with playing with fake swords and jousting. The rest of in such tiny screens! I am also the most patient and tolerant person in the realm of crap out there. Maybe it's because somebody has to be. Or I don't feel as entitled as most people. I've become very adept at clashing with non-collaborative (read: egomaniac) singer-songwriters.

I'm learning to fail forward...I'm not really good at it yet, but you can't grow without failing forward.

I've been really good at being lucky.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My kind eyes and face. I am very easy to talk to, which is both a blessing and a curse. Possibly my strong yet introverted personality, which only seems to concern people who do not know me.

Someone said today they recognized me from somewhere. It's not the first time. Coworkers don't believe I'm 34.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Art is highly subjective. As a person with high artistic intelligence it's really not fair to judge others on the basis of their tastes in art. Most people can't even begin to enjoy the music they have because they don't have a good hifi to listen to it on. Most people don't care. So what does it matter in terms of choice of the written word or television?

Some may conclude the above paragraph is me on my high horse/ivory tower about art. It's not true. I just don't believe one's taste in art is reason enough to dismiss that person.

I love this song, though:

Food is really important to me, largely because a complete primal lifestyle change in 2010 combined with a large amount of knowledge gained working in the food industry with a niche food company. All that needs to be said is for people to read the first chapter of "The Primal Blueprint" by Mark Sisson. I hate only one thing in life...wasting food.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Ketosis. A means of getting from Point A to Point B. Merino wool -- wearing that stuff reduces my water consumption big time. My job. My family. Clean sustenance -- including organic pu-erh tea. It's magical. And I need to buy more.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I spend lots of time in my head. It's a curse/virtue of being an INTJ (for those keeping score in the Meyers-Briggs universe). I think about lots of things. My future. How to find someone to connect with. I don't need to be the person in the Heineken commercials, either. What the future of our food supply looks like. How I can get better at everything in my life. How to get out of my own way at times. How to apply what I know without being dangerous.

I think all the time.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
This all depends. Do I have a gig Friday night? What season is it?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I know how to slow down the aging process. The first two weeks are tricky, but after that's it's cake.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
There is a considerable amount of stunted growth in the single-and-over-30 population: those who want to grow through the learning process of developing a relationship are stymied by those whom A) want nothing more than a relationship that represents their status quo without making any real impact or B) like "the idea" of being romantically involved but don't have the courage to allow people into their lives.

I'm in a position where I cannot continue to grow in the way I want to without another person as part of the process. It's not a matter of codependency but a matter of self awareness and understanding my own limitations.

What's so frustrating/interesting about "online" dating is how robotic we all seem to be. The lights seem on but nobody's home. I'm not into small talk. I don't write non-engaging or inappropriate messages to people. I write based off what I have to work which honestly, isn't much with many people.

I'm looking for someone interested in going to the center of the Earth with me.