Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I think about American dating culture a lot. If America's
population is an internal combustion engine (let's face it, we
picked the wrong industry to sustain our economy!), then the single
population and dating culture is what sits in the oil pan. All the
bits and pieces of metal amongst the dirty oil -- that's what
dating is right now.
What's happened is that men and women are now financially
independent of each other. Congratulations! We all now have the
ability to be slaves to our own consumption! The fact that women
don't necessarily make as much as men in the same fields is
immaterial because single men and single women are miraculously
able to afford houses on a single income these days. What does that
have to do with dating?
People are scared shitless that someone who can't consume on their
level is going to ruin their life. No, seriously. You gotta have 12
months of paid vacation per year these days so you can spend 3
months in Bali per year. It's like all of the Gen-Xers are living
like retired people with day jobs and are so bent on keeping a
particular lifestyle that if you don't match up you are going to
ruin their life. I've experienced it. I can tell from people's
profiles. That's why there are so many single people over 30!
And people want to romanticize dating in pre-internet America.
Really? My parents met in the middle of nowhere in 1978 and just
happened to be in the same circumstances at the same time, except
my dad by 21st century standards would have been viewed as a
complete loser: unemployed with uncertain job prospects (though I
was nearly born in a company vehicle) and he certainly had income
potential question marks.
That's what people care about now. Our values are fucked up as a
result of "mutual gender independence". There's nothing wrong with
being "bohemian" and traveling the world and racking up frequent
flyer miles, but let's face it, that's not a lifestyle that
includes another person unless you've cultivated that together.
Otherwise the only solution is to find someone willing to be
stuffed into a suitcase, taken out when needed, and put away when
Most people in America are extroverts: they have a pathological
need to be around people. I want to quote "Chasing Amy" right now
but people are too fragile to see the point... As an introvert,
it's stupid to spend an hour with someone on a Monday night who
doesn't give a rat's ass about interacting with me and getting to
know me and is only in for moments of having their mind blown when
they learn "Get Down, Make Love" is not a NIN song, but a cover of
a Queen song from 1977.
Dating has turned into a series of airport bar conversations
between someone interested in getting to know another human being
and another person interested in getting free information and using
another person for 1-2 hours and that's it. It's a Christmas
Miracle (or not) if two people interested in getting to know one
another and developing a relationship interact. It's not a gender
thing. Both genders and everyone in between suck, and it's because
people are enslaved by their consumption.