I was born in Astoria, OR (that's right, I'm a goonie) and grew up in West Texas. I recently relocated from the metropolitan behemoth that is DFW to the Austin area. I'm a weirdo in search of other weirdos.

I enjoy peanut butter and pickle sandwiches and long walks on the moon.

My day job is mobile product design. I also moonlight as a bartender from time to time. I make loud racket and video insanity under the guise of music/art. I love to travel, and have either visited or been through a majority of the contiguous US states, mostly via touring over the years. Hoping to see Europe some day soon. I like outdoorsy stuff on occasion. I'm also into riding concrete and bombing hills on skateboards, creative video editing, happy hours on the patio, classic arcades, cooking out, dancing around the house with my headphones on at 4am, infusing liquors, mixing creative cocktails and cooking feasts at home, checking out weird noise/avant garde/wtf shows, good times with good friends and the general pursuit of all things awesome. I strive for novel experience. Fuck the bullshit.

Secretly ruling the universe while remaining humble. Being a good friend and coming through in a pinch. Figuring out problems with a fresh perspective. Entertaining myself when it seems like there is nothing to do. Hearing music in everything... it's not uncommon to catch me drumming polyrhythms on my steering wheel to the beat of my turn signal, or harmonizing with the drone of the dryer. I can also do a mean Bohemian Rhapsody and Hey Jude on some karaoke. You've been warned.

I'm tall, dark and loathsome. A life-long friend probably put it best: "You're like Chewbacca. When people first see you they think you're a big dumb scary motherfucker. They don't know that you're actually smart, fun to hang out with and really good at fixing shit."

Read: All things Bukowski, all things Terence McKenna, all things DisInfo. Philip Levine. Cormac McCarthy. Chris Hedges. Fred Alan Wolf. Hunter S. Thompson. Chuck Klosterman. David Icke (watch out for the reptiles!). Any weird non-fiction books pondering conspiracy theories, degenerate behavior, or quantum physics and the nature of the universe and what this "reality" might actually be.

Watch: I don't watch regular tv but I can get down with Netflix once in a while . . . Easy Rider, Stand By Me, The Fountain, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Natural Born Killers, Waking Life, The Neverending Story, Breakin', all cheesy 80's horror, Kenneth Anger, Jodorosky, Wondershowzen, The Walking Dead, Breaking Bad, all things Adult Swim.

Listen: Neurosis, Today is the Day, Dark Time Sunshine, Radiohead, Slayer, PhantomSmasher, Kid Cudi, Nadja, MGMT, Aesop Rock, Mouth of the Architect, Gnarls Barkley, Prefuse73, Crowbar, Unwound, Elliot Smith, Thrones, Deltron 3030, Square Pusher, Rwake, John Coltrane, Prince, Gregory Alan Isakov, Eric Satie, The Beatles, Tobacco, BMSR, Fugazi, Willy Nelson, B. Dolan, Budos Band, Bill Evans Trio . . . basically a little bit of everything you can imagine.

Eat: ALL. Challenge me if you dare, I'm that dude that will gobble down toasted bugs, grilled innards and curdled blood cake just for the experience. I also have a serious weakness for exotic cheeses, stinky Italian cured meats and red wine. And pho. And craft brews. Disclaimer: I balance things out with lots of raw organic veggies, juicing, and gnarly raw kale/garlic/ginger/turmeric smoothies. But don't tell anyone.

Behold, the second noble truth of buddhism: The origin of suffering is the attachment to transient worldly things and the ignorance of the nature thereof. Deeeeeeep, huh?

Imaginary Jesus

Why so many girls have dinosaur names on here . . . Dorkasaur Jr., Clitorasaurus Rex, et al. It's okay if you're one of these, you can still message me.

The fact that we're all on a giant rock hurling through infinite space at untold speeds orbiting a monstrous never-ending nuclear explosion

How the government and mass media control and brainwash us relentlessly in an attempt to create a soft tyranny, an invisible mental prison within each of us which . . . nevermind.

The fact that rad shit is going down somewhere RIGHT NOW and I'm not privy

Bacon. Cheese. Bacon and cheese.

If a tree falls in the forest, could it sue the forest for pain and suffering?

You thinking about me thinking about you in an infinite loop of who gives a fuck. Right now.

the Egg Man. I am the Walrus.

I'm not wearing any panties.

-You can form coherent sentences and come up with something more interesting to say than "Hi".
-You have an insatiable urge to stick it to the man
-You don't have more issues than Kleenex got tissues
-You ain't gotta lie to kick it
-You wanna start a sex cult
-You think you can drink me under the table
-You use more curse words than actual words when you speak
-You like getting naked and setting shit on fire
-You just should. Gah!