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41 / F / Straight / Single
- Last Online
- Yesterday – 2:16pm
- 5′ 6″ (1.68m)
- Body Type
- Not at all
- Agnosticism, and somewhat serious about it
- Graduated from masters program
- Art / Music / Writing
- Rather not say
- Relationship Type
- Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
- English (Fluently), Spanish (Okay)
Music: Father John Misty, Ty Segal, The Clash, The Black Lips, silly pop
music, all kinds of obscure random world music, old New Orleans
funk, The Ponys
Movies: Breakfast at Tiffany's, Shawshank, any film by the Coen
Brothers or Christopher Guest.
Food: French, Vietnamese, sushi, tacos, sugar
After work tonight, back at my apartment, I happened to notice a little bird chirping outside my window. A sweet little thing, pudgy, with a white crest and shiny, teal-black head. He was hanging on a wire just waiting for me to greet him. I sat down on my sofa and pried opened the window extra wide, hoping he might burst into an ornamented, melodious tune, and then he and his friends would fly into my parlor and they'd tie ribbons in my hair, as it happened so often in the Disney films of my youth.
But instead he just chirped, but it was a pointed chirp, an exhorting chirp... clearly he was trying to tell me something. Just then my phone told me I received an email from OKC. Was it a sign?
So I asked the feathered oracle: "Say little bird, you think I'll meet someone special anytime soon? A really great guy, who will watch movies with me and get my weird shit and tickle me until I scream?"
Immediately he stopped chirping and peered at me sideways, to get a good, long look. He then hopped off the wire and flew right into the side of my building.
- Straight guys only
- Ages 35–50
- Near me
- Who are single
- For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
A few considerations if you'd like to message:
*If you have photos of your penis on your profile, or send me photos of your penis/nude body, I'm not going to respond. I'm sure you're a totally stable human being, but it's just too jarring and completely freaks me out. I'm totally cool with nakedness, just not before I get to know a person.
* I have a healthy dislike of LOL and OMG, when I see these neo-acronyms in print I automatically remove IQ points, I don't know why I just do. One of my Luddite quirks.
* Remember, there's a real person behind this profile. Please don't IM me at 7:00 am on a Saturday. I haven't had my coffee yet, and might not be in a super sexy mood.
* It's really strange when (grown?) men write direct sexual propositions to me as an ice breaker. I understand the impulse to say crazy shit to a stranger, but it likely won't make for a good start to anything. Such submissions will probably just get passed around my office in a memo entitled, "Look at what this crazy motherf-cker sent me." You've been warned.
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